My b/f and i got engaged...he gave me the ring and later bought the band to match. Further in the relationship i find out he was cheating, and now we are broken up. He has not mentioned the rings, but should i give them back, or keep them?
The way i see it is...he is the one that cheated and caused the relationship to go sour, so don't i deserve to keep the ring on the pretence that i held up my part of the deal in this? I dont want the rings to continue to wear them though, I just dont think he should get them back. what do you think?
2007-06-15 02:35:44 · 62 answers · asked by knk724 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
the ring is yours to keep.....they are your to sell or do what ever voodoo you want to do to them....good luck!!
2007-06-15 02:38:27 · answer #1 · answered by Wicked 3 · 1⤊ 5⤋
NOT Seeking Revenge:
It's only fair you give them back as they no long mean anything out of personal respect. He dedicated probably 4 weeks pay for the rings to last a lifetime. If you didn't get married, they are rightfully his property
Seeking Revenge:
Sell them for a buck and give him the dollar when he askes for the rings back, or keep the cash and go on a spending spree.
All depends on how you feel about the split and how deep you want to rub the salt into the wound.
2007-06-19 01:47:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If i were you. i would re-considered keeping the rings; the reason.- would be - every time i see the rings on my fingers i get the tape play in my head about the break up, how unfair he was, why did he cheated on me;was i pretty enough; in other words you will have all this negativity playing in you head at all time.
i think you need to heal from this relationship ,need to severed all ties completely form him; give him back everything that he gave you.
start all over again. you have been deeply hurt and abruptly disappointed; in thinking you were going to have a splendid future and a new life with this wonderful man.by the way; you are very lucky to have found out now , not years later down the road . things will be looking up for you, a man like him , is better to have hot coals on your head; he would totally destroy your happiness. you are a very smart lady for taking such courageous decision . you need to heal; go out make new friends, go dancing go to church do something different.
God bless you,
been there.-
2007-06-15 03:06:24 · answer #3 · answered by COCO 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he hasn't mentioned them it's a non-issue. Keep them or sell them or pond them. Or, this is what I did once, I knew where the ring was purchased and our engagement ended before the year was up (most places you can return the ring within 6 months to a year). I also knew where he kept all his receipts. So I got the receipt and returned the ring to the store for a full refund. He had bought the ring on his credit card, but I started to cry when I told the woman the engagement was off (real tears, I was hurt, even though I was the one who broke it, he didn't cheat or anything, I just knew it was a mistake) and she felt so bad for me that instead of insisting I bring the credit card to reverse the charge, she gave me the balance in cash! I went Christmas shopping with the money. So if you can get something out of the pain and suffering he caused you, then why not? Good luck.
2007-06-15 02:57:51 · answer #4 · answered by Brandy 6 · 0⤊ 3⤋
I don't know the law where you live, but I have read that the law states an engagement ring belongs to the man who bought it until the wedding takes place, unless he gave it to her as a gift--like Christmas or birthday. Amazingly, some people have been to court over this. You got rid of the man
(smart girl!), get rid of the memory. Give the rings back; they will not bring you pleasure. And it is the right thing to do, if you read the etiquette books.
2007-06-15 02:43:21 · answer #5 · answered by M S 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
For all of you women saying keep it and sell it - don't be shocked or offended the next time a man calls you a shameless gold digger. That's exactly how you are behaving.
Why would anyone want a lasting reminder of a cheating fiance around their finger? Bitter much? Move past the bitterness, be a grown-up, return his filthy stinking cheater's rings, and get on with the rest of your life.
2007-06-15 03:36:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You got a lot of answers on this one! I didn't read through them so don't know how many agree with me but here goes...
Be the better person and offer the rings back to him. If he is any kind of gentleman he will tell you to keep them as they were bought for you and with you in mind. If he accepts them back, that will tell you even more about him as a person.
2007-06-17 04:57:58 · answer #7 · answered by loving_life 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually this will depend on the laws of your state.
Some see the ring as a gift in contemplation of marriage and as a gift does not need to be returned.
Some states see it as a conditional gift that can be kept only if you proceed with marriage (regardless of fault)
Finally, there are states that say if the groom breaks off the wedding then ring is kept by the bride to be, but if the bride to be breaks it off then it goes back to the groom.
My thought -- shove it up his ***, but that is not a legal answer. I would not want anything in my life that reminded me of the louse.
2007-06-15 02:41:17 · answer #8 · answered by Susie D 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Either way - the rings were a gift. However - if the engagement ended on a good note (if that's even possible) I would give the rings back. But because he turned out to be a cheating bastard I'd keep them and sell them for all they're worth ;)
2007-06-15 02:41:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
I heard somewhere before that if he gave you the rings as a Christmas or birthday or other holiday present then you get to keep them....but, if he just proposed out of the blue and gave you the rings, then you should give them back.
Personally, I don't know what I would do. Part of me would want to sell them - but you won't get that much money.....but another part of me would just want to throw them at him, preferably so he missed catching them and they ended up down a drain!
Good luck!
2007-06-15 02:39:42 · answer #10 · answered by CASEY R 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
this is a simple question...
because he cheated on u you should not give it back... however, as many here said, why keep it? sell it and give the money to a public school that needs the money, or some other worthwhile recipient... you'll feel good and it will be closed and done with...
in general i think this question revolves around the particular case... if the break-up was mutual and not based on anyone having done something harmful, then i'd say return it... why hurt someone who hasn't harmed you? just because judge judy says you can?
bottom line-- if he hasn't harmed you, give it back... if he has, **** him...
2007-06-15 20:18:07 · answer #11 · answered by mongoose11225 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋