I've been in a 3 year relationship with a guy who is six years older than me. During the last 3 years, we've had only oral sexual relations about 6 times. I've talked to him about our lack of sex but he hasn't responded. I put on a porn flicked and masterbated in front of him and he was offended. We just get in the bed at night seemingly on opposite coasts. There are guys who are very attracted to me and he knows it but he will not concede and give me compliments or tell me how attractive I am, etc. I compliment him a lot because I believe in letting your partner know that you find them attractive because if you won't others will. But, he will not tell me, he will not give me sex, etc. He is uptight a lot. I know he isn't having sex with anyone else because we are always together. Recently someone sent me a text message stating that they wanted to fu@$ me and he found it and became angry. I didn't do anything but I was like ur mad because someone wants to, but U will not. HELP
2007-06-14 15:41:35 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Talk to him. Has he been sexually abused? Maybe he has erectile disfunction and is unable to keep it hard during intercourse. Maybe he is afraid he is pressuring you because you are so much younger than him. Have both of you had sex before? Maybe he just perfer oral sex. These are the only things I can think of. But the only way to really find out is to sit down and talk to him. Let him know you are concerned. Tell him you care and you want to understand where he is coming from. I hope this helps you.
2007-06-14 15:50:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I mean a guy that isnt interested in sex after a 3 year relationship has issues that you havent discussed. The average guy thinks about sex every 13 seconds so you may need to get a therapist involved if you want to stay with the guy.
2007-06-14 22:45:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure what gender you are. Are you male? If so, some gay males don't like anal, I knew a bi guy that didn't. He may think it is dirty. Why don't you ask him?
No matter what gender you are though, it sounds like you need to ask him if he will tell a counselor why, who can then tell you with his permission? Or will he talk to somebody who can talk to you? Or will he go to counseling with you to see if he might start communicating on this issue? You need to find a way to get him to open up and talk to you about it, and if he would feel more comfortable with a therapist, then definitely do that.
2007-06-14 23:08:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy has issues stop giving him oral sex and maybe just maybe hell give in. The only thing I can think of is maybe he needs VIAGRA. The uptight part is because he needs sex to loosen up
2007-06-14 22:45:51 · answer #4 · answered by mmedina96 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is very unhealthy sounding to me, because we are pretty much the same situation(3 year relationship, engaged, he is 6 years older) but the difference is my fiance cant get enough, and if i were to "pleasure" myself, he certainly would not be offended. theres something wrong, it could be physical, it could be emotional or otherwise, but you need to have a serious talk and encourage him to get help or get out, because if it continues, you know it will have to end sometime, youll never be happy, if you were you wouldnt be asking on here.
2007-06-14 22:47:04 · answer #5 · answered by ♥mama♥ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he might have a low libido. He may need medical intervention along with some therapy. If you are willing to broach him with the subject, then maybe you can solve this issue. Communication is the key my dear!
2007-06-14 22:45:29 · answer #6 · answered by llselva4 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Definitely bail out...this isn't normal....
But BTW--neither is being in a "relatonship" with one guy and getting a text message from another saying he wants to fu@$ you......
Say what again? what was that about?
Makes me think there is a lot more to this story......
2007-06-14 22:50:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Staying in a constricting sexual relationship such as this will have bad ramifications (side effects) for you if you stay...and trust me - having sexual hangups is not what you want if the problem is not you....Time for you to move on...Good luck.
2007-06-14 22:47:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you don't state the ages you are but maybe he is having a problem with erectile dysfunction and doesn't want to tell you. I think you shoud sit down and talk to him to try and figure out what the problem is
2007-06-14 22:46:31 · answer #9 · answered by nerakian 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems he has lost interest in you for some reason and these are serious signs. He very well could be getting satisfaction elsewhere or having other issues
2007-06-14 22:45:15 · answer #10 · answered by benayamin y 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋