My father was recently told by his doctors that his lungs were so black if he didn't wuit smoking he would die very soon! On top of that he's diabetic and doesn't follow any of his guidelines oe even attempts to take care of himself. I've tired to get him to quit and to stop eating sugar and to take care of himself and he says he doesn't care.
So what should I do? He's being totaly selfish and ignorant, i don't think he realizes what I'd go through if he dies, I'd have to take care of the house the bills and my baby sister.
So if he wont make a change for his kids when I ask him what can I do? I'm just...I don't know what to do anymore. :(
2007-06-14 14:26:24 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Start openly planning the most difficult details of his FUNERAL including the list of people to call. Be sure to make all the choices he would not want.Have him spinning in his grave before they've even dug it.
Maybe he'll start listening when he starts thinking of how certain people wil have to remember him, since he obviously wont consider your feelings.
I know that is harsh but its obviously harder on you than on him. you have to flip that around.
Good luck
2007-06-21 11:40:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know there are very serious diseases that plague people. I'm not trying to say that smoking and diabetes are more difficult than other health problems but they are definitely near the top of the list. I know people who absolutely cannot stop smoking, no matter what. I also know people who struggle with diabetes. A friend of mine is diabetic and she struggles with food choices every day.
I can see how this is like a double dose of 'difficult' for your father. Have you suggested hypnotherapy to him? Maybe his insurance would cover part of the cost. It is extremely stressful to handle both of those conditions.
2007-06-21 18:58:33 · answer #2 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for your anguish. But the man is going to pass away sooner than later and you need to step up your thinking. You will always need to deal with the bills. At this time, give him quality of life, think of the time left with him, and cherish it. Love him, as each day may be his last. Is it better to kick him out in the streets, and still have the bills you will have? Is quitting smoking/sugar now going to save him? No, be at peace dear heart. And strengthen you resolve to do what you will have to do on that bleak day.
2007-06-14 14:36:34 · answer #3 · answered by Nifty Bill 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My heart aches for you. Unfortunately, his poor choices have probably already determined his fate and there really isn't much you can do for him.
Turn to God, because He will guide you through this. Ask Him for strength, wisdom, and patience. He loves you and will help you with whatever you will have to do. Know also that your dad loves you. He can't fix now what a lifetime of bad habits has done to his body. Let him know that you love him and keep encouraging him to change his ways, but don't take it personally if he can't.
My prayers are with you.
2007-06-19 07:25:27 · answer #4 · answered by leslie b 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tyr to seek help from relatives or what about your mother i take it she is not around coz u didnt mention her. but try iof you can talk to her .your dad is being selfish and needs to be told that he has you and your sister to consider, but also keep in mind that in his condition he is very ill and this will play a big part in his decisions to act the way he is. hopefully you will find the help to chang his mind in the way he acts .good luck
2007-06-14 14:34:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think all you can do is just be there fir your dad right now because he is going through something even though it makes you mad he is still your dad and i know sometimes we can just lash out at them then that is what we call been disrespectful and you don't need that so just hang in there because that is your dad regardless how mad he is making you right now.....
2007-06-22 06:24:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you can get him into counseling there isn't much else you can do. You might try talking with his doctor, it could be he needs to be on an anti-depressant since he is being so self destructive.
2007-06-14 14:32:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's not much you can do for an addict. He has to decide for himself to quit.
If he dies, you will have a big responsibility, but I have a feeling that you can handle it. Calm down.
2007-06-22 07:17:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call a suicide hot line and use apostrophes when appropriate.
Both of those are life savers.
2007-06-22 06:26:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
set him down have all of you guys ask him to name all the things he can lose if he dosent quit smoking.
2007-06-14 14:31:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋