Ex wifes who care only about $$$$ and forget the kids?

Question

I got on a question today and couldn't beleive other people had ex-wifes' almost like mine I am taking " It " ( as I refer to her in private back to court for custody ) We went to the temporary hearing and I got custody of my 13 year old. I am still trying to get my 7 year old and have had my 16 year old from the start. Have any of you had luck with this and what can you tell me that will help. I don't want to keep her from my boys' but she will not compromise and it's tearing up my 7 year old and myself. I don't understand why she is so concerned about trying to make me continue to pay her child support. I always paid it and am current. But in the temporary hearing the judge ordered that I no longer pay her anything. I saw her in the hall and she was balling. At the time I thought she was afraid of losing custody of our 7 year old. But when I offered to split custody and possesion 50/50 she said hell no so I now have to fight for full custody which will limit her time if not for the$

Answer 1

I feel just awful for your kids! What a terrible position for them to be in.

The question you really need to ask yourself is "What's best for the kids?" It needs to be your underlying motivation in every decision you make. Is it better for them to live with you and see their mom on visitation, or is the other way around better? Would they benefit from 50/50, or a modified 50/50 where they live with each parent for several months? Do the three kids need to be together, or is it okay for them to live in different houses?

Once you've been able to answer these questions honestly you have one more to answer, "Is it worth the heartache to the kids to have you both fighting?" That's a tough one, because you have to look at the long run. What's going to be good for them today may not make them good people in the end.

If she truly is motivated by money, offer her alimony in exchange for you son. You could pay her the same in alimony as you've been paying in child support, but get custody of your 7-year old.

It's really a heart wrenching decision, but it sounds like you're keeping a cool head and being logical about it. It's not often you hear of a dad who is so willing to fight for his children. Congratulations to you on being a real man.

Answer 2

In some states, once a child is 12 it is they who decide where they want to live. By the way, if you have two children and she has only one, and if you were both working and earning the same amount, she'd be paying you child support.

Get a good lawyer and keep track of your records, and do what is best for the children

Answer 3

Well if you care more the children you will fight for full custody, show her that you could do it, then she will have to pay child support.

Answer 4

Just be careful what you offer to her outside of the vicinity of your attorney. She could change her mind later. You did great getting what you have so far, and are obviously are good father. Some women are just money centric and cant see past it. Keep doing what is best for your children and you will be the winner.