I feel like an idiot for asking this. My wife was hurt 3 weeks ago and we have not had sex since the incident. I have tried be patient but I am going crazy. I do not know what to do. I told her and she says sorry she is just not ready. We usually had sex 3-4 times a week. This is the longest we have gone since we got married 7 years ago. What should I do. I do not want to pressure her but I am going crazy. Would it be bad to pressure to have sex even if it is basically just for me?
2007-06-14 08:41:27 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Cant she at least give you a hand job? Maybe she can take off her top or bottom and you can watch her and masturbate together? Get creative, you dont just have to have intercourse!!!
2007-06-14 08:44:25 · answer #1 · answered by Jennifer L 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋
You are pathetic your wife was involved in an incident and all you are concerned with is your sex life. Maybe it is time for you to go without for a few months and then you would be able to whine. I think you need to just use your hand and give your wife a break she will come around when she is good and ready maybe she is liking this break. No one on average has sex 3-4 times a week married that long I think your lying for one and well if you ain't you have alot to be thankful for so just grow-up.
Let me see it has been roughly 6 months. Been married almost 8yrs.
Never pressure a loved one to do anything that is selfish and well just wrong!!!
2007-06-14 10:23:30 · answer #2 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was she hurt very bad? If she truly is hurting just be patient with her. Maybe there are some other ways that she could help you out besides having sex... why don't you try giving her a full body massage and see if that gets her in the mood it always works for me! Oh yeah at least 20 minutes worth if you know your wife you'll know when she's ready.
2007-06-14 08:46:09 · answer #3 · answered by Toni R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go as long as need be. Treat her better then that. If u was doing it 4 times a week after being married 7 years u r one lucky dude. Don't miss it up with pressure. Wait for it, it'll come. Pressure now may get it but 4 times a week may never come back.
2007-06-14 09:06:40 · answer #4 · answered by Davweso 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have two answers. The first is what God says... the bible says, in 1 Corinthinans chapter 7 - and I'm paraphrasing - "a man and wife should only seperate themselves for fasting and prayer and then come together again least one is temped to evil". So in other words, the way to keep the marriage going on course is through intercourse. Sex is very important to keeping the balance - most people think sex is just something "fun" to do. It's deeper than that. And when two people are join as one through marriage, that bond is solidified by sex. Now, granted your wife is sick...not sure how sick she is, but if she can't have sex you will have to just wait, hard as it is, and don't cheat. But if she is able to have sex, but refuses, then she's breaking her vows and technically you have every right to get it elsewhere. However, we live in perilous and Godless times and cheating and divorce run rampant. If your wife can't give you intercourse, can she at least satisfy you orally? Or by a hand job (I know, it's not much better than masterbation but if that is all she can give you right now, it's better than nothing, no?). The point is it's not ony a "good" idea for her to give you sex, it's her REQUIREMENT to do so. But, if she can't, you promised to love her "in sickness and in health" so you can't just go cheat now. Give it some time. If you think she's stalling because she just doesn't "want" to have sex, then ask her if you can get satisified elsewhere. I assure you, she'll "heal up" quickly. Good luck.
2007-06-14 08:51:52 · answer #5 · answered by Brandy 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Smashley is an idiot. Being a guy doesn't mean that you must have sex all the time. Easy to see the quality of man she's with, huh? Women "need" sex just as much as men. Away with these ridiculous notions and stereotypes.
Don't pressure her. Not at all. Can you elaborate on what you mean by "hurt?"
I take it that this "hurt" is more emotional than physical. If she's not ready, she's not ready -- period. I know your body is going nuts, but you must respect her feelings and judgment on this. Stimulate yourself for the time being -- and please don't cheat. I'm not implying that you would, I just hope you don't for her sake.
2007-06-14 08:45:18 · answer #6 · answered by hbomb8404 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
All men think the same thing at times "I want a cold beer, and i want to see something naked". If your wife is in too much pain to give you sex, ask her if she can give you a hand job or something along thoes lines. You are being an honest guy and you have honest needs. Tell her that you love her and that you dont want her to get hurt, but you really need some attention in the sex field. If there is anything she can do to help you, Im sure she will. She will apreciate you much more if you are patient with her. Good luck.
2007-06-14 08:49:41 · answer #7 · answered by shadowsthathunt 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
After having gone for 3 months or more (for no reason other than my wife was simply not willing), I would say no, don't push her. I am not saying you would be wrong to do so, although without more details I do not know if there is a physical or psychological reason behind her lack of desire, that is actually hard to determine. Either could be valid though so give her time. She will more than likely come back to where you guys were before the incedent.
2007-06-14 08:49:33 · answer #8 · answered by s1lvermidnight 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it would be bad to pressure her to do something that she is not ready for. I went 8 months and I didn't go crazy. Now there are other things she can do until she is ready, if you know what I mean. Talk to your wife and see if she's game. No, it doesn't involve another woman.
2007-06-14 08:45:32 · answer #9 · answered by kitcat 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't pressure your wife for sex; she will only resent you. Three weeks isn't all that long. Masturbate, if you need to. You had a normal, active sex life before, just be a little patient and it will come back.
2007-06-14 08:45:07 · answer #10 · answered by Yogi 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try almost nine months. When I became pregnant, I had really bad morning sickness and the slightest food odors or cologne would make me want to gag and vomit. I didn't want to kiss him; let alone have sex with him. You may ask her to help you out in other ways. If she cannot physically assume certain positions, she may be able to help out with oral sex. If not, then what about a handjob. It may not seem like much, but it's better than nothing.
2007-06-14 10:05:53 · answer #11 · answered by zoraya6971 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋