Have a 4.5 month old child who seems to be anti-Pavlovian with respect to eating. How can I help him?

Question

Some more details. I have been told that it is a personality thing that there is nothing I can do about. He gets very intense when it comes to eating, freaks out when I put the bib on him (takes only a few seconds) and reacts somewhat angrily when the bottle is removed for only a few seconds. The way I see this behavior is that the more he does it, the more it makes his belly upset.

I don't think it has anything to do with the mechanics of his bottle or the way I hold him, etc. I really believe it is pshychological on his part. If he is gassy, I give him myelicon, which seems to help with that. I burp him often and keep a schedule on his feedings, make sure he his diaper is changed etc. Sometimes it looks like he tries to eat more than he can handle as he will down 8oz. and get upset at bottle removal even AS he is spitting up! Any suggestions would be helpful. Thanks!

Kaci...we try that too, but most of the time he wont take it. Moreover, he seems to want something else - his choice(stuffed animal or whatever) in his mouth 99% of the time! I am worried that things in his mouth can be overkill as well. Illustration: does having something in his mouth all the time upset his belly? Can you elaborate?

zippy... he wont refuse it, I have to stop him. He seems to keep eating as if he feels like: "if I stop, I will never eat again"!

we also try adding a little rice to his formula to make him feel like he is getting 'full', but sometimes this also does not work.

I suppose that I should add that he will FUSS if I don't feed him! I wasn't aware that this wasn't clear!

Schedule is +/- 45 mins every three hours, sometimes with more variation; Not THAT strict. If he stops eating or falls asleep, which is rare, I do not continue. I think it is closer to the truth to say that he doesn't 'feel' full perhaps because it runs right through him. I believe it is this 'not full' feeling that makes him want to eat too much or more than he can handle; not trying to go against the research, just giving my observations! I am not sure that feeding him whenever he fusses for something in his mouth is good either, as this is much of the time. As far as just making it a larger problem than what it is, I am just trying to make him as comfortable as possible (his burping sounds like it hurts sometimes and and sometimes it feels he can spit up a whole meal!
I am seeing two sides here and I have already leaned toward the conclusion that he is conflicted between what his mouth wants, versus what his belly wants, and it is somewhat psychological!

Answer 1

HI,

I think that you might be worrying more than you need to, and with a baby this young, that is really normal. I know, I did it.

As for amount the baby is eating, all the research shows that babies will not overeat. The operate solely on a biological level and the only mistake that parents can make is to try to regulate or control their eating in some way. If you give him food whenever he wants it, he will be fine. Children under 3 will not overeat and in fact, given a selection of healthy food only, a child will, on their own, eat a balanced diet, but this is only true if fast foods, sugary foods and candy are not provided, so when he's older, start the day with a filling bowl of oatmeal or eggs and whole wheat toast or yogourt, a banana and toast then put out a tray for the day with the following options: halved grapes, halved grape tomatoes, cheese strings, rolled up meat (not processed), cut up and/or pieces of kiwi, apple, mango, avocado, banana, strawberries, blackberries, blueberries, veggies and dip (carrots, cucumber, celery, red pepper, broccoli, snap peas,etc.), tuna sandwiches, peanut butter and banana sandwiches (half a sandwich at a time) and just leave the tray within his reach at the kitchen table and let him eat as he pleases. He will be just fine and healthy too.

As for the pablum thing right now, studies show you should wait till 6 months to start a baby on solids. Basically, the food is just running through him and not filling him at all because he doesn't have the pancreatic and stomach enzymes to process the food yet, which might explain his need for more food. It's taking up room in his stomach but not giving him any nutrition so his body is telling him he's still hungry. It might also be upsetting his little tummy and, since it is likely that he could be allergic, you should check into that for both the formula and the pablum. This could explain a lot of his behaviours and discomfort. He might be "getting" this which is why he might be responding by getting angry when you take away the bottle. He knows it's the only thing satieting his hunger. I'd drop the pablum and other food and just do the bottle. Also, try holding him while you feed him instead of putting him in the high chair for now. He might respond better to it when he's older.

Good luck,

Sarah

***Just saw your additional notes....your baby is teething, this is why he is putting things into his mouth constantly. It is normal. Perhaps he's trying to chew on the bottle tip, but even so, don't limit his availability of the bottle tip. If you feel he is in discomfort, try the teeth first. If the remedies you decide on don't work, then try the potential for an allergy. It's a game of elimination, but you need to know that it is totally normal for a baby to want to stick anything and everything into their mouth. Not only is it used for teething, but it's a means of exploring and learning about his world. Taste and tactile are most poignantly coming from the mouth at this age. Again, I think it's teething discomfort, which can be pain or just a need to bite down on things. Teeth usually start coming in between 3 and 4 months, so I'm sure this is part of what it is.

Answer 2

1 year

Answer 3

How strict are you handling the scheduling? Every pediatrician that I have ever had any dealing with has told me not to schedule feedings. You are either attempting to feed them when they are not hungry, or you are not feeding them when they want fed. Babies don't do schedules very well....no one ever taught them to read the paper.
Most babies will not overeat, they have no motivation to overeat. Maybe he wants sucking comfort. Have you ever tried him on a pacifier? Possibly that is what he is wanting and overeating at the same time. As far as the freaking out... maybe he senses your stress? That can freak out most babies.

Answer 4

He may be using the eating as a soothing sucking and gets upset with it being taken away. Try a pacifier if you haven't already. This is what I have to do with my little girl because she has a much higher need to suck. She was born early, and I've been told that's one of the reasons for it.

Answer 5

He probably wants the sucking action more than the actual food.

After a bottle, give him a pacifier.

Answer 6

Babies only eat if they're hungry. If they're not hungry, they'll fuss and refuse - it's that simple.