Should I go to my husbands ex-wifes house for a birthday party for their son. The woman has never spoken to?

Question

me. She always addresses her issues with my husband. I do not like her, she says and does some of the most stupid things. She believes she is the only good parent. I fear that if my husband spends time with her and their kids together he will miss that environment and want to go back to her. We have been married for almost 2 yrs.

Answer 1

don't worry he hates that crazy *****, but they are his kids. go with him and make nice at least for the kids sake. it can't be easy for them either.

Answer 2

You married your husband for better or worse right? You knew he had an ex-wife and a son with her, right? Divorces don't happen because things are going good in a relationship and you've only been married to him for two years. I'm sure she's still threatened by your relationship with him. Whatever she does, they are her issues, not yours. If they do start to affect your marriage, talk to your husband about it. You are his wife now and he needs to stand up for you if she is being disrespectful. You don't have to like each other, but you all need to be civil.
If you are worried about your husband wanting to go back with her just by spending time with his son and his mom, you need to look at why you feel that way. He did marry you, and chose you. If that isn't enough, then why not? Has he done something? Said something? If not, you cannot spend your whole life worrying about the "what ifs." Because if you do your marriage wont be a happy one and it wont last that long. Enjoy it and have fun together. If he has said or done something, then talk to him about it. If there's more going on, it's better to deal with it now, before it gets out of hand. When you married him you became a team, and you both need to act like it, no matter what. That's the for better or worse part.

Answer 3

If she says and does stupid things, then why are you afraid that your husband would want to go back to her? Does he like stupid people?
Stop worrying about the past, and start taking care of the present. Your husband's son is YOUR son. It doesn't matter where the party is held, you need to be there at YOUR son's birthday party. If you think you will have a problem dealing with your husband's first wife, then don't deal with her. You're not there for her anyway. You're there to help celebrate your son's birthday. Do so with a smile on your face.

Answer 4

OK if your husband is going you should go because sometimes the ex invite you to things that she know that you can't say no because these is her and his son that is involved there so i guess that she is trying to do something stupid that day that make you get mad with your husband and Thais right what your thinking just follow your heart and why she have to address her issues with that's not right if he is with you they don't have to spend time together for what if he want to see he son the court will give him the days that he could see his son OK i hope these could help you make up your mind believe me i know what you're going throw

Answer 5

I sense that you are not real secure in your marriage and also that you fear any kind of interaction with his ex. First, if this is the only birthday party for your step son, you need to be there, it is not about you, it is not about his ex and it is not about your husband, it is about your son. Unless you are specifically not welcome, you need to go if your husband goes. If you are not welcome to go, then your husband needs to not go and the two of you need to have another party for your son. She has no reason to speak to you as long as your husband will handle things with her and that is fine. You are the other woman, like it or not, you are and will always be. The best thing you can do is be there to support your son, smile, have a good time and even if she is not nice, you need to rise above that for his sake.

Answer 6

Were you the cause of their breakup and divorce? If the answer is yes, then do not go.
If not go with your husband and act nice, smile and try to relax. You may want to tell your husband prior to going that you are uncomfortble but want to go with him and see his son.

We have experienced the same in our extended family. The ex-wife and new wife are not compatible, however on those rare special days they both are on their best behavior. We always make sure we do not spend more time with the ex-wife than with the new one.

Answer 7

I wouldn't go. If your husband divorced her and you have been married for almost 2 years I couldn't imagine why he'd want to get back into a relationship he wanted out of. I think he is going for the sake of his son and not for the reasons you fear

Answer 8

I think you should definitely go. You need to go because whether you want to or not those kids are also a part of your life. She needs to understand that you are a part of his life and therefore she must respect you and accept you. Don't even think about him missing the environment because I guarantee you he does not. All he misses are the kids and that's why you need to be a part of their lives whether she likes it or not. If you go to the party then she'll get the point that you are here to stay!!! Good Luck

Answer 9

According to what you said, why are you even considering it? No. You should not go. Send a card if you want, or better yet, you and your husband take him out on your own.

Answer 10

I doubt he will want to go back to her. There is obviously a reason they broke up in the first place. However, your presence cannot MAKE him not want to go back to her if that's what he's thinking. That is totally out of your control.

Answer 11

Did your husband marry you for your self confidence, strength, zest for life ? Go, be the better woman. Ignore the intimidations.