....do they so often feel like the whipping boy for all that bad men have done and do? Very rare is the feminist who doesn't want to occasionally describe a sexist scenario she experienced that day.......and then she'll get mad if he's not just as outraged as she is. Even the most enlightened heterosexual male is still a man, so he'll sometimes get an earful about how his testosterone impacts her. If a feminist is with a man who is kind and smart enough to recognize equality for each gender, why isn't that enough?
2007-06-14 01:03:41 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
That would be irritating scenario however, not all (not even a majority) feminists are like that. You are making generalizations about people that you don't really know and it is unfair and incorrect.
2007-06-14 02:14:53 · answer #1 · answered by ecogeek4ever 6 · 8⤊ 1⤋
Being a feminist in a relationship with a smart, kind man, I can tell you that this isn't the case. I don't take things out on him, because first of all, I'm not angry with men. I'm not even that angry. There are some things that I would like to see changed, but outside of the internet, I don't talk about it that much. When I do get pissed off about something and feel the need to complain, if he doesn't agree with me, I don't get upset. He is a smart guy and I find his opinions to be very interesting and insightful, even if they are different from my own.
2007-06-14 05:59:48 · answer #2 · answered by ☭ 4 · 7⤊ 0⤋
You need to separate yourself from the behaviours of others. It is the same way that I feel outrage at the racist and homophobic acts that are committed everyday. I feel angry that these injustices are occuring and I can feel empathy for the person telling the story and how this must feel as if their gender has little power and how this may impact their opinion of some men and the system that has encouraged this kind of action.
When I listen to stories of different kinds of abuse I have to distance myself from the situation and be a listener and a observer. You can comment that that situation is yes terrible and you handled yourself well in this situation and point out the resilience this takes. I would think that if this women began the relationship with this kind of constant conversation a smart, kind man would probably decide to date someone who provided him with the kind of diologue that didn't make him feel uncomfortable. I realize that their is a great deal of injustice going on in this world but nobody should dwell on it constantly or else they would live in a constant cloud of depression. Carpe diem.
2007-06-14 02:45:08 · answer #3 · answered by Deirdre O 7 · 9⤊ 0⤋
Very interseting because I think women are prone to settle for the same reasons that are metioned above, however pretty much everyones objective is to ultimatly not to be alone, die alone, and to have a witness to ones life.Before I was married I had a fear of being involved and getting hurt . and now that I have married my worst fear is that one day I might be alone, with know one. Its basically the same type of fear so you really are in a no-win situation. The goal in life is to appriciate every thing that you do have and enjoy whatever positives are in ones life. For example, though your friends are complaining of married life, they do love the fact that they are not alone and that they have a companion. As for you, you appriciate the fact that you have the freedom you have, but dont want to be alone to have a companion. So another good question to ask is why is what we do have in life never good enough and why do we all look for more?
2016-05-20 00:39:20 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All feminists would not expect you to listen to their daily, sexist predicaments.
This scenario must hurt you very much, though.
A discussion like that is not too conducive to a fun date.
Have you discussed it with her?
Maybe let her know what you have written here.
"I like and respect women and you in particular, but I don't feel comfortable talking about specific Feminist struggles". There's nothing wrong with having boundaries, even when you are a very nice guy.
As for the posters here who accuse Feminists of being shrill and too verbal in their struggles, that is exactly what has been said about "Uppity Black people" since before the Civil Rights movement.
Change requires a lot of effort, and people's discussions help further change.
Good luck
2007-06-14 06:58:35 · answer #5 · answered by Croa 6 · 5⤊ 3⤋
because they have a vested agenda. They seem to blame men for all their problems. If their life doesnt turn out to be the way they wanted, they just want to vent their frustration.
The fact is that we are now living in a female dominated society, legally and otherwise.
The feminists see red in everything !! Recently, a delegation of powerful feminists and met the prime minister of India and asked them to separate the "Child" part in the Ministry of Women and Child Develoment, as it reflected sexist tendencies !!
So, feminists want all the perks of being a woman (hold the door open !!) and they claim that their rights are being withheld (will anybody ask them, what their rights are ??) and they want NONE of the responsibility !!
The agenda of feminists is not equality. It is to oppress men and blame them for everything they are not happy about !! It is about domination.
2007-06-14 11:23:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋
A truly kind and intelligent man would actually listen to a woman's problems. Such men, I assure you, do not feel like whipping boys.
2007-06-14 15:06:06 · answer #7 · answered by Theodore H 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow. Nothing like taking a (possible) personal experience and generalizing it to all people everywhere.
Whatever, man. If your girl's a drag, then dump her. Don't try to utilize your bad experience to criticize a political and social movement.
I'm a feminist. Most of my friends (male and female! Imagine that, a male feminist!) are feminists. Most of my feminist friends are also currently in heterosexual relationships. The dynamic that you describe does not happen in any of their relationships, or mine, for that matter. Your not doing anything but playing to the old stereotype of feminist as man-hating ball-buster.
2007-06-14 10:04:04 · answer #8 · answered by sparky52881 5 · 0⤊ 4⤋
Hold on there Sport....I don't think that the situation you describe is an exclusively 'feminist' trait. There are many, many women out there who are equally brutal to men...and it has nothing to do with feminism. When alot of women find themselves with a 'kind' man, it doesn't take long for them to take advantage of that kindness. They will find a way to manipulate it and use it for their own purposes.
There are also many good and decent women out there, who would LOVE to find a good and kind and smart man - who would show appreciation and love, and reciprocate that goodness. But sadly, we seem to see alot more of the manipulative sort these days....
2007-06-14 01:40:29 · answer #9 · answered by Super Ruper 6 · 7⤊ 3⤋
Sounds to me like this kind man didn't know what he was getting into by being with a feminist in the beginning...then again the feminist should not assume a man is also as effected as she is by other male behavior....ponderous indeed....I believe it is best to just agree to disagree sometimes..=)
2007-06-14 01:49:15 · answer #10 · answered by *toona* 7 · 2⤊ 4⤋