Serious Question Concerning Sexual Attraction?

Question

I have a serious question, I am not really sure how to ask it or if I am even asking the right question.

If you are attracted to a member of the same sex lets say a male friend you just meet about two years ago and over the course of that time you became intellectually and physically attracted to this person and yet you've never acted on that attraction as in having sex with the person, but you do feel a strong connection both intellectually and physically with this person, does that make you gay?

Why is this happening to me now when I am in my late 20's and not before. I've never experienced this type of sensation about another man before.

Answer 1

perhaps you have just realized what you want if someone you want to date. so you could be straight...on the other hand if you have included thoughts of him in your fantasy life (you know what i mean) then i would say you are gay. the physical attraction i guess would have to be more defined. if you mean that you always want to spend time with your friend and you are happier when he is around that could be gay or straight. each person "friends" differently. but all in all you may be gay. and imagine that since you are in your late 20's that really sucks! heck i wonder about myself now and im in highschool and i want that all figured out by the time i am your age!

Answer 2

It happens. They say we're all a little gay under the right circumstances. Your bond with your friend seems to be the ideal circumstance. There is also something called a Platonic relationship, where you have an intense attraction and bond with another person, but you never actually get physical. Some relationships work best on that level. Whatever you do about your relationship, enjoy the warm fuzzies. Some people go a lifetime without ever experiencing them.

Answer 3

It sounds like raging hormones with a touch of narcissism. It is not that unusual to fantasize about a person of the same sex. That does not make you homosexual. Even having sex with a person the same gender as yourself does not make you a homosexual.

Homosexuals are towards their own sex the way heterosexuals are towards the opposite sex. We heterosexual men, for instance, don't just want to have sex with a woman we also love women. We like to be with them. We like to hold hands and buy them flowers. We are romantic with them etc. Homosexuals are this way with persons of their own gender.

In a pinch a heterosexual man could easily hump another man if he is horny enough. Such activity occurs in prisons all the time. But after the lust is satisfied, they have no attraction or even have revulsion of the act. Not so with women.

Homosexuals have no such revulsion. They are truly sexually disoriented. Their feelings towards the same gender is like heterosexuals towards opposite gender.

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Answer 4

since you both obviously feel the same way, be honest and tell him. You do not have to act on anything just yet. True friendship is based on complete honesty. Previous advice are sensible, but if the physical attraction you are referring to is sexual want, then it is a homosexual attraction. If by the same token you are sexually attracted by women, then you could be bisexual. Do not label yourself and just be who you are. By your age you do know what sexually attracts you. Smile and be happy.

Answer 5

I don't think that this makes you gay at all. It's perfectly normal to think of someone of the same sex the way you describe. If you should choose to become sexually involved with this person, that would make you gay or bi. I think that all people question their sexuality at some point, it's normal.