How can I get my children age btwn 15 and 17 to put studies before their comp games and friends? Pls help...?

Question

I've explained the importance of studies and given them enough freedom to play their games but it seems that they are taking advantage of the trust I placed in them. Not taking school works seriously but playing attentively at their games.How to knock sense in them?Pls advise how to put across my concerns hard into them? Thank you.

Answer 1

my parents have the same problem with me

tell them that if they don't study you're going to take away their computer time/games/anything at all necessary... and PLEASE don't be afraid to actually take it away from them. most kids nowadays, esp. teens, don't think that if their parents say that kinda stuff then they'll actually do it, so if you do then it'll certainly get their attention! and i'm sure they'll listen

good luck

Answer 2

First step: turn off and disable the computer by whatever means is necessary. Step two: Gather up all the computer games and parts, and put them in a box. Step 3: Store the box of games in an inaccessible place (such as a storage unit away from home) whose location is known only to you and your spouse. Step 4: call a family meeting and explain to the children that since they have been abusing not only their privileges but your trust, they have now had that trust and those privileges taken away. In addition, I would also explain that this situation will continue indefinitely until the kids get their grades where they belong, and until they can show themselves worthy of trust again. The kids need to understand that the use of the computer to play games on is a privilege, not a right, and it must be earned and then maintained by correct behavior and self discipline. At 15 and 17, these kids are more than old enough to understand this concept. I would expect a lot of complaining, yelling, and even a few tears at first- it may take awhile before they realize that you are serious about this and mean business when you say schoolwork comes before games. The kids may also try to sneak in a game when you aren't there ( say at work, or at the store) which is why you need to make sure that the computer has been disabled and will not work, no matter what they do, BEFORE you tell them what is happening.You can bet that they will look for the games- and be pissed at you when they can't find them anywhere. Finally, I would expect that your kids may try something like going to their friends' houses to play games there, and that problem has a simple solution. It's called grounding- and calling the parents of your childrens' friends, explaining the situation, and asking the other parents to help you enforce the ban. Who knows, some of them might even get the idea to try this with their own kids, and that will work to everyone's benefit. Good luck, and I hope this helps you.

Answer 3

You make them. At there ages they should be able to be trusted to do there work. But since they want to act like little kids treat them as such. Make them sit down at the table when they get in from school so you can watch them do there school work. If they don't make good grades remove the games ground them form friend both in person and no phone calls either. Be there parent not there best friend. Show them what happens when they break a trust

Answer 4

They aren't ever going to choose studying first and they will always take advantage of your kindness if you let them. What you need to do is take away the controlers and limit their game playing and tv watching.
They may yell, cry, complain whatever, but they study first then they can play later. It may not be comfortable to lay the law down but you need to be the parent. If you have to get in touch with their friends parents to help in this matter do it. They will be upset but you are the parent. You can do this. Good luck

Answer 5

T.R.O.U.B.L.E.,,,,,,,
You are in trouble now mom.
you need to remove the computer and games from the home all together or this could get physical quick.
if the studys keep up to your standards for a couple of months then you can re introduce those things S L O W L Y...........

IT ONLY WORKS IF BOTH PARENTS STICK TO THE PLAN.
teenagers are a tough headed breed,i am sorry for you .

Answer 6

What I did was require the work to be done before the play. I think that kids get away with what we as parents let them get away with. I think that the games, phone, outdoor/indoor play, etc... should be earned and I think it should be earned through hard work in school and studies. I think you should take away the fun, until after the work, and stick to it until the end. I think it will change things. It did for my kids.

Answer 7

well u be in the same boat every parent is
this is a well know thing a bout us still attending edu
and i probably shouldn't divulge this info put i passed this year with a b so ill squeal (good karma)


alright so you want a 15 and 17year old to stop put n friend and computer games ( gods gift to those younger than25)
be for studies ...................................... I'm sorry trying not to laugh.........they wont study unless u make them study worst case scenario you ave a procrastinating dyslexic with
A.(attention)D.(defficit)H(hyperactive)D.(disordre)adhd
which basically means he can stare at a blank wall and keep himself entertained for HOURS NOT 1 NOT BUT MORE LIKE 4 (THAT ME WEEEEEEEEEE)
SIT DOWN DRINK SOME COFFEE BECOME AT PEACE WITH GOD OR BUDDHA or the one u worship and then ask him/her y u what did u do to deserve this
then walk out side find ur circuit breaker and turn off every thing but the lights washer dryer and cooking appliances
sit them down and force feed them the knowledge

Answer 8

haha I had the same problem...
until I realized that my mom didn't care if I ever talked to another person online, played another game, had a social life, etc. =)

basically, take away their computer privelages until they study. or, however long they spend doing homework, studying, etc, give them the same amount of time on the computer and vice versa. So if they decide to spend 2 hours on the computer before studying, make them study for 2 hours after that.

Answer 9

These are all good ideas--the pdoc tells us to find what they love and use it to manipulate them into doing what they need to do.

But as another mother, I want to be sure you've had the "what you're growing up to be" lecture. If they grad high school, maybe they can work at Wal-Mart. To get any kind of job that pays enough to eat, you need a 4-year degree. No degree: look forward to digging ditches & swabbing toilets.

Getting good grades and taking school seriously IS important.

Answer 10

make it worth there while to do there homework offer a reward of some kind for example if they get good marks on their report cards bye them a video game they have been wanting or anything you can think of and if that dose not work take them past the local soup kitchen and show them what happens when people make poor choices in life its kind of harsh but some kids need a reality check from time to time

Answer 11

Step one:

Unplug all games.

Step two:

Place them in a box.

Step three:

Take said box out of the house to a place they cannot find.

Step four:

Say "The games will come back when your grades are up." Or they have done a certain amount of homework. Or whatever benchmark you want to use.

Step five:

Repeat Step four until they stop asking.

Step six.

Don't say anything else.