English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

When i was about 5,6, or 7, i was molested by my uncle. I havent told anyone in my family or friends about this, simply because i know they wont believe me. To be honest though, being molestated though doesnt affect me at all. But whenever a guy tries to flirt wtih me or even touch me, i get soooo damn uncomfortable. And im 15 so i should be wanting this almost, if u get me. So i get so uncomfortable to the point where i start to stutter or i start to shake. Since i claim that being molested doesnt affect me, i dont know, could something like far from the back of my mind feel that it is because i was molestated?

I know its a stupid question, but this is the best way that i could explain it.

2007-06-12 12:11:31 · 16 answers · asked by natalie 2 in Social Science Psychology

16 answers

It sounds as though you're trying to convince yourself that it hasn't affected you. Your brain is telling you otherwise. I was molested as a baby, and also as a teen. If you don't release your feelings, you'll never be able to heal enough to have a meaningful relationship. You need to tell someone you trust, and get your Uncle's sorry *** locked up. If you don't do anything it'll eat away at you. Especially WHEN he does it to another child. Think about. It won't be an easy road, but you need to heal.
God Bless all the little children.

2007-06-12 12:27:12 · answer #1 · answered by corsinofour 2 · 0 0

This is not a stupid question, and you're right to ask it.

You're also right that something from your past like being molested can affect your present life. If a man you trusted when you were younger betrayed that trust, then it can be very difficult to trust all men/boys from then on. The fact that you become really uncomfortable whenever a guy starts to flirt with you indicates that there is some (maybe many) aspect(s) of this incident that you haven't recovered from, even if you aren't currently thinking about it or consciously reacting to it.

I do understand that it's hard to tell your family about something like this. And if you think that they won't believe you, then you're probably right not to go to them for help. But you should still reach out for help. Try talking to your high school counselor or to your pastor if you go to church. Either of these people will be able to help you get the help you need to recover from what your uncle did and move on with your life. And please remember...what happened to you was NOT your fault.

2007-06-12 12:23:10 · answer #2 · answered by Nerys 4 · 2 0

One it's not a stupid question it's a very good question. I am 52 and was molested at age 9,17,21and 36. You don't forget it. That is probably one of the reasons that you're uncomfortable around young men. You should talk to someone that can help you to learn to live with it. You may or may not ever get over it, that's very difficult. but you can learn to live with it and to have a good life. But if you don't find someone to talk to than it will crop up again in your life and crop up again in some other way until you do. Go to a counselor at school and they should be able to direct you to some help. Please take care of yourself. It will be better for you in the long run.

2007-06-12 13:28:33 · answer #3 · answered by Kathryn R 7 · 0 0

I think it has, especially since you immediately mention it. I really suggest you talk to some counselor or some adult that you really trust. You would be surprised how many women have suffered the same thing. There is a lot of support out there. Like 1 in 4 women has had the same thing or been raped.

I have a friend in her late 20's and she talks about a similar thing that happened to her at age 7. She talks about it very comfortably, but she has some sexual issues that I think she can't recognize. Don't let it get worse.

2007-06-12 12:21:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Awwww, my dear, I wish I could hug you. I know how you feel. I was molested by my uncle, and friends of my mom. When I told her she did not believe me and called me a liar in front of everyone.
It could be that you are affected but it could also be that you are not ready. Don't rush yourself or let anyone rush you. You know already how it feels to be force to. Just give it time. Besides you are 15. You have a long way to go. You should report your uncle to the cops.Maybe it will make you feel better.
Parents are suppose to believe their children or else they are not good parents. If your parents don't get it than tell the school. They will help.

2007-06-12 12:38:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Even though you don't think it has effected you at all, it kinda proves it did when a guy cant even touch you without you getting uncomfortable. No matter how old you get or how much you try to forget it. You'll always remember what happened. There's a part of your brain that stores all information that you've ever learned, but you rarely use it, when boys touch you, it must trigger that memory, so all you have to do really, is just get over it, sorry to be so straight forward about it, but that's the fact. It will be hard, but you'll eventually get used to it, and even feel comfortable about guys touching you again.

2007-06-12 12:19:28 · answer #6 · answered by Nunya B 2 · 0 1

I was abused in every way imaginable as a child. Then as a teenager I was brutally raped, sodomized and beaten. You don't ever forget and yes it affects you and your relationships, especially intimate ones.

The best advice I can give you is to try and get yourself some counseling. These days they have counseling that is totally private even from parents {just in case your abuse is within family}. Try family clinics that also take care of violence and abuse victims.

The issues only become worst as you get older if you do not seek professional help and it also effects with whom you allow in your life and in your bed. You want to attract a wonderful and loving individual not a bum that continues to enhance your non-worth in yourself because what has happened.

You can go on to live a great life with a great person if you love yourself enough to give yourself what you need.

2007-06-12 12:29:23 · answer #7 · answered by Native American Girl 3 · 2 0

i replaced into molested by a thorough relatives buddy whilst i replaced into 10. It has brought about a existence conflict with weight and vanity, yet in no uncertain words could it ever be an excuse for me to harm yet another newborn. That being mentioned, in the beginning i does not permit a preteen babysit in step with age on my own. they are lots extra in all probability to panic in an emergency and much less in all probability to call 911 whilst the area demands it. Secondly, i does not hire a boy to babysit interior the 1st place when you consider that many extra offenders ensue to be boys. it is not honest and it makes me experience terrible to assert it, yet i'm being honest. Coming from a place of discomfort, i does not possibility it. I lady is extra in all probability to the two grow to be promiscuous or sexually nerve-racking, neither of which impacts a newborn different than themselves. yet, there are continuously exceptions to any assumptions.

2016-10-17 01:54:34 · answer #8 · answered by dicken 4 · 0 0

IT IS AFFECTING YOU!!!!
no matter what you seem to think or say....
what you are experiencing when you are flirted with or touched brings up the trauma...
this is called Post Traumatic Stress Disorder.. ptsd for short.
Seek help...therapist..counselor.. you CAN get through this... and have a normal relationship with a special someone after you work through what happened to you when you were a child.

2007-06-12 12:32:27 · answer #9 · answered by running2adream 6 · 1 0

Maybe it's good to seek a counselor. They can help you with strategies to overcome this shaking.

I had the same thing too, except with anxiety. I would shake and worry and Panic and I didn't think it affected me that much, but it did. I got a counselor and met with her once a week every week for about 3 months and I'm as good as new!

2007-06-12 12:20:15 · answer #10 · answered by Justine 2 · 1 0

fedest.com, questions and answers