Women,I need help understanding this?

Question

Me and my girlfriend, I'm 36 and she is 37, have been married only once to another and spent most our lives single and not dating much before we met. Things have been going really great until one day she seemed different. Then the next day she would not tell me she loved me and when I asked she told me that her emotions aren't there any more. We have not been fighting and I know she has not been cheating on me. Now, every time she looks at me she feels hatred and she does not know why. I told her that I will move if it will make her happy and she told me she doesn't want me to go and she doesn't want any one else but I can see it in every aspect that she can not stand to look at me and I nor she don't understand why. I have not cheated nor has she.
What is going on with her and has anyone else experienced this problem and if so why????

Answer 1

The problem is hers, not yours. It's naive to think she doesn't know why she feels this way, she does, she just doesn't have the gall to tell you to your face. Move on you don't have to deal with that kind of crap. If she doesn't have the integrity or gall to talk to you about how she's feeling and what's causing it, how do you expect to deal with the problems that are guaranteed to come out of the relationship in the future?

Answer 2

I am sorry to hear that you are going through problems with your relationship. Besides the change you mentioned above in your girlfriend have you noticed anything else? Has she been sleeping more? Has she been eating more or less than she usually did? Also when you said things were great. Was your girlfriend hyper (full of energy), sleeps less, very talkative and extremely happy? If she has had any of these symptoms I would suggest that you get her to her doctor and then a psycologist. These are all signs of bipolar disorder. Bipolar disorder can be treated. Good luck to you and your girlfriend. Debbie

Answer 3

Us women are hard to figure out and we are emotional. It may be possible she does not have feelings for you but is afraid to come right out and say it because she can not stand the thought of hurting you or not having you somewhere in her life. It may also be possible that she is in some weird mood and just does not know how she feels. I would not push the issue too hard for a little bit but just give her some space. Maybe she needs to rediscover herself....kind of step back and figure out who she is as an individual. It is even possible someone said something to her or she heard something and now she is playing mind games with herself and questioning whether or not her choice to be with you was the right one. I would just give her some space. But if she continues much longer you should probably break it off and tell her why.

Answer 4

This is what happens in EVERY relationship. And, this is one of the key reasons why couples want to get married. It's all about commitment and knowing that deep down you love each other and are committed to each other, even when you don't feel like it. Trust me, every couple who has been married for any length of time goes through times like this. Just be gentle, hang in there, and do all those special things, daily, for weeks and months, and one day she will come out of it.

Answer 5

Whatever it is that is going on with her is causing her to hurt you. Stand up for yourself. She's not being honest if she was fine and all of a sudden is changed. Something happened and she doesn't want to tell you. Why stick around for her to figure out how to be honest? She's telling you she feels hatred. Don't wait for her to tell you to go. GO! Find someone who feels lucky to have you. You deserve it

Answer 6

Perhaps she is thinking that your realtionship is a dead end relationship .....maybe she wants marriage and thinks that you will never ask her. I would suggest the two of you either sit down and bring out your true feelings and/or get some counseling to see where you go from here.

Answer 7

Sorry to hear about this.....It must be tough if nothing extraordinary has happened and if you didn't see it coming, either...

I'd say move out....give her space and time to think things over. You do the same---evaluate pros and cons.

But I also think you should both agree that she goes to therapy or counseling...sounds like she has issues she has to address ASAP. (It wouldn't hurt if you had your sessions, too.) I am a firm believer in marriage and on trying your best to make it work----but sometimes you realize life is too short to be miserable. God doesn't want us to be unhappy, IMO.

Good luck.....You will be in my prayers.

Answer 8

It sounds as though she has lost feelings for you. Her reason for not wanting you to go is the same reason that women stay with their abusive husbands; she thinks she wont find anyone else. You need to talk to her and find out if this is the case, and if it is, I suggest you leave her; it is very painful to live with a partner who does not have the same feelings toward you as you have toward her.

Answer 9

She needs counseling and if she is unwillingly to seek help, you need to move on. Life is too short to be with someone who neither cares for you or themselves.

I do not think I could stay if someone told me the things she has said to you. Best of luck to you.....

Answer 10

I ran into this with my x too. Except it all started after we got into a heated fight about 2 weeks after i found out i was pregnant... he said of corse it wasnt his and that it belonged to a guy who had tried but didnt suceed in attacking me, not very possable, but he kept denying itwas his, but i was soo insecure and desperate for it to work i held on to him and listened to this through the whole 9 mo and 6 days until she was born and looked exactly like his mother, ooops for him so he quit. but i still felt a rage inside for him, i finally got myself together and moved far away, but thats what its going to take for her to feel difrently along with meds and counseling, is she bipolar? just bite the bullet and move on...