Pregnant - Why does everyone think I am going to be at home with the baby?

Question

I am in a role reversal marriage. I am the breadwinner and my husband is home performing the homemaking role. There are a lot of reasons for this, but right now it made sense for him to be home. Siunce my earning power is high, we agreed that after the baby is born, i will take a short maternity leave - then he will stay home full-time. Why does everyone assume I will be the one to do it?

Answer 1

There are a lot more stay home moms that dads. If this is what works for you guys then it is great. My cousin is a stay home dad, and he is involved with all the groups for kids to play. He says the only thing is that he is the only guy, but he's learning a lot about woman.

Answer 2

LOL, people just assume that since you have HAVING the baby that you actually want to BE WITH the baby. Most people automatically assume that the man isn't having the baby therefore isn't as tied to the baby and can leave it each day. Most people assume that a mother's primary role is to be a mother. How silly of them.

I know, you are choosing not to do this, but at least understand where everyone else is coming from, and by the way, you might be VERY successful having a house husband.

Answer 3

I'm in the same role reversal you are. And i had the same pressures when I was pg with my last son. Just tell people that it is in the best interest of the family for you to work, so after a short leave, you will return and your husband will stay home. Most won't know what to say and will shut up. others might try to convince you otherwise. Just kindly ask if they are pregnant when your family became their financial burden. :) Good luck! The role reversal works well for us.

Answer 4

Because it's more common... Is it not? Look around: in 99.9% of all cases, if one parent stays at home with the child, it is the mother, not the father. Assuming something that is predominantly common is the only way we can function; otherwise we'd have to re-evaluate everything we know on an hourly basis, leaving us no time to do anything else. There's nothing wrong with being different; but if you're going to be different, better get used to the wrong "assumptions", because it ain't gonna get better.

Answer 5

Because people still think that stereotypes are real. And stereotypically the female stays at home and takes care of the kids while the male goes off to work and brings home the bread.

Answer 6

Traditionally the woman stayed and did the household work. But it has changed SO much I can not imagine anyone assuming you'd do it. Rather I do not know why they would question why you'd work full time & him at home. I think it's great and wish you luck in your marriage and work.

Answer 7

I personally think it's important for kids to have a stay at home parent, and if it's the husband, I think that's terrific!

It's really up to you and if you would rather go back to work, then you should go back. Only stay home if you feel like it's the right thing to do. Many men stay at home with their kids.

Answer 8

they just assume that you'll be staying home because that's the usual traditional role in a family. usually the wife is the one staying at home taking care of the child. it doesn't mean you don't love your child any less it's just a little sterotype people put on families.

Answer 9

B/C it's just the normal thing. Don't take offense to it , just correct them. There is nothing wrong with Role Reversal Marriage. Dad's love is just as great as mom's!!!!

Answer 10

Most people think this because apparently the stupid British, where unfortunately America came from, that's what happens. Most women don't work. They stay home with the kids. My opinion, correct them every time they say that. It maybe frustrating, but they'll catch on that that's what's gonna happen.