I have a problem. As a teen girl I've done some stuff, that I'm not proud of. Slept with a few people, and was basically a rebel. I never committed no crimes, but I was a little bit hot in butt. Being that, rumors was started about me. I use to play boys, and they would get mad and talk trash about me. I didn't really care much since I knew the truth.
Now, that i'm older, I don't know what I was thinking. I"m emabarrssed, but at the same time I understand I was a teen and wanted to feel love.
My past has a hold of me, because now when I go out, I feel as if everyone is looking at me talking trash. With that, I have anxiety whenever I have to step out the house, and afraid to meet new people. I'm afraid they might find out about my past. In my world it feels as if people are watching my every move.
How do I overcome this?
2007-06-12 02:10:38 · 9 answers · asked by LoveLess 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
It sounds as if you feel guilty. This does not mean you have to live in regret. I am sure we all have done some things in our lives, especially in youth we see as mistakes, I call them "Mis-Takes", kind of like a cut in a movie where you get to try again to do it better next time. Regret is a heavy load of baggage carried forward into your now. As you age you reinvent yourself all the time, you will never be the same person you were 10 years ago. Look back with no regret, see all the things you have learned as a result of your experiences, they sound many, be thankful for the life experiences and that you don't have to repeat them, unless you choose to. Other peoples opinions of us are just that, they belong to other people. The only opinion that really matters in this life is our own, about our self. Hold your head up high, strut with confidence, be true to yourself, give people direct eye contact. If you did something that hurt someone in the past, say you are sorry for that and move forward. Be all you can be for today! You can never change the past, only your future. Peace and good Luck!
2007-06-12 02:31:59 · answer #1 · answered by gypsey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't unscramble an egg. Everyone has things from the past they wish they could undo. It's good that you can at least be honest with yourself and face it. That's a good start. We feel inferior with others because of the garbage in our lives, and we think that we are the only ones that have it. The best thing to do now is just see how powerless you are to change the past, to feel the regret and remorse, and to realize that the present is the time to start living in a new way. Seize the opportunities to be the new and better person you were meant to be, starting today. When we start living rightly we undo a little bit of the past and outgrow it completely with time.
2007-06-12 09:22:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't let your past drag you down. Instead, be glad you have learned some valuable lessons. As for the trash-talkers, don't give them free rent in your head. You sound as though you have forgiven yourself, when you say you understand why you behaved as you did. Maybe those trash-talkers are also maturing (i certainly hope so), but your own good life does not depend on whether they get it or not. It is no more foolish to play around than it is to talk bad about others. Just let it be, and look forward instead of backward. Rediscover your inner courage. There are plenty of good people out there who won't be judgmental.
2007-06-12 09:29:26 · answer #3 · answered by RE 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a wonderful quote in a book that I was reading, called 'Getting The Love You Want' by Harville Hendrix. The quote says: " Today is not yesterday, and tomorrow is not today". This means that YOU choose where you want to go today, to make a better tomorrow.
Sounds like you have matured considerably. If others hold your past against you, then they are not worth your time. Surround yourself only with positive thinking people who are a good influence and are aiming towards successes in their lives.
No one, including a future boyfriend or husband, needs to know about your past.
2007-06-12 09:46:59 · answer #4 · answered by Big Bear 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember that what has happened has happened. Try as you might, you can't undo it. So "live the present" moment. Don't worry about the world backbiting. People who have long tongues will not stop wagging them, so you don't have to care about them. Just go ahead and carry on with your life as if you are beginning a new day. Think positive about yourself. Dream new dreams. Make new friends. Hang on the old friends who stand by you. You are ruining a perfectly good present by worrying about the past. The past is just that PAST and gone. Good Luck !
2007-06-12 09:18:41 · answer #5 · answered by E Courtney 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No one is perfect, and if they say they are, they are just fooling themselves. It takes real people to admit it! We all have a time in our lives that we are not totally proud of, but we must just get through it and not dwell on it or it can ruin our lives and our future. You are a good person, and you must beleive that about yourself. Dont think about the past, but think about how good your life will be, and have more self confidence that you are just as good as anyone else if not better! Once you beleive that in yourself others will too! Take care!
2007-06-12 09:34:07 · answer #6 · answered by autumn wolf 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Teen years were invented for mistakes, and you should not feel bad for the choices you have made as we all have been there. Those that say they were innocent and problem-free must have been locked in a vacuum somewhere !! Try not to dwell on your past - for it is just that - and use it to describe a place you were once at instead of who you are as a person. We all change as we grow older and for your mistakes, you will become wiser in many ways. Cheers !!!
2007-06-12 09:21:08 · answer #7 · answered by square_dotzz 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to accept the fact the past is the past,and accept yourself for who you are now...Your past is only haunting you,others forget over time....Now that you have changed your ways just remind yourself of that as often as you need to and prove it to yourself by learning from your past mistakes,instead of repeating them...Then you will know within yourself that you have truly changed,and the happiness that follows that will be the impression you give others...Self confidence is an admirable trait to have and you are capable of owning up to that as well..=)
2007-06-12 10:20:47 · answer #8 · answered by legendary~cool 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget about the past and think about the future. We all have past regrets, we just overcome this by creating and making a new beginning.
2007-06-12 10:00:17 · answer #9 · answered by wbsy08 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋