Would you think he was cheating or........?

Question

was wanting to cheat if you found out that your hubby had profiles on several dating websites? I found out my hubby has accounts on several dating sites and he even says on there he is seaking someone within a 50 mile radius!!!

We have been married for 12 years and I am pretty upset!!! We have had a few minor problems, just like all marriages. But I thought things were fine, then I find all this. Thinking about him leaving me just kills me, I mean I was 15 when we met and have never even dated anyone else.

What would you do? Confront him? Please help!!!

Answer 1

OOOH answer his ad, and see what he says.. make up a fake profile, nice pictures, etc, and you'll find out everything you need to know in your reply.. then BUST HIM.

Answer 2

Oh, wow, I guess you are upset. How horrible.

It is very obvious that your husband needs some excitement in his life. If he is approaching his 40's or later, it is possible that he is having those weird feelings that middle aged men get, sometimes. They have these thoughts that they need to be with someone 'strange' someone 'different'. They feel like they are getting old, etc.

Like you, I would be devastated. I have been married ten years and we have our differences, at times. I would flip if I found out that he was looking around. It hurts to even think about it!

I would sit down with him and tell him that you adore him, that he is your life. Ask him why he has done this and please listen to his answer. Have an open mind. Give him plenty of time to talk it out. Be his friend. Let him pour out his heart.

He may need a more exciting sex life. Perhaps you could explore that area.

If he won't go to counseling, you go. You need to have someone to talk to...a lot! They will give you tools on how to handle this whole thing. If hubby will go with you, well, that would be great.

Don't confront him. Approach him with sincerity, with concern.

I talked to my husband about this 'affair' business. He swears that if a man feels like his wife is his best friend, is not criticized by her, and they have a great intimate relationship...well, there is no way they will stray. Of course, not all men think this way...I guess.

Good luck to you.

Answer 3

Oh my ___, u must be really pissed. Well honestly I don't even know what I would do. But u have to confront him about it. I mean you have put a lot of yrs in this relationship and for him to even go on the dating sites is really messed up. Now that I think about it I think that I would consider leaving him. Before later on u find out other things. Because u are still young. Well Good Luck!

Answer 4

Good grief, yes, confront that sneaky skunk!!! He is seeking someone??? Then he will find someone ; there are a lot of lonely women on dating sites. There are also lots of married men looking for some fun on the side. You can bet these women do not realize your hubby is indeed a hubby. Your husband may just be playing with them on line to stoke his ego, but that still doesn't make it right.

Answer 5

Confront him, but before you confront him print out the ads and have your proof in your hand b/c he will deny. Then he will say that he was bored/curious or some other b.s. excuse. Honey, he is cheating or looking for someone to cheat with. There's no reason for a married man to be on dating sites (plural) if he's not planning on doing anything.

Answer 6

I think he's looking for more than cheating. He's looking to leave. Much the same way someone looks for a new job before leaving the current job. sorry if that isn't what you want to hear and if that is painful, but that is reality. I also hate to break it to you that although he may be physically present, he has already left. Pack up your stuff and move back to your mother's.

a question that seems obvious to me: how did you discover that he was on dating sites? Were you checking them out as well?

Answer 7

I'm not sure you should confront him. Maybe ask a friend to make an account then you are not the one lying by having a fake account. If you confront him and he is cheating he might have some lie already spun up.

Answer 8

Oh hell ya, I would confront him. Don't let him draw you into his lies either, why would your husband have to put a profile on a singles website unless h e was cheating. Even though they might not have met yet, he is thinking about it. That would be like my husband looking at a singles website and telling me he was looking for a girl for his best friend. Come on, do I look like an idiot!

Answer 9

You have a nasty situation on your hands. He has no business being on those types of sights. He might claim he hasn't talked to anyone or done anything with anyone. However by being on these sites, he has cheated emotionally on you. Sometimes people go on those sights just "to see" what they are all about. Your husband shouldn't have that type of need. He is married. Everyone has problems, but he needs to figure out how to work on them as opposed to run.

Answer 10

I would definitely confront him, maybe with a ball bat! You are married, he should not be on dating sites at all, that is cheating. If he hasn't yet, he is thinking of it. Talk to him before it is too late. See what you can do to spice things up for him. After being married for so long, he might be just going thru a phase. Talk to him now.

Answer 11

Yeah, you have to confront him, directly, right now. Don't play games. Ask him what he's doing on those websites. Ask him if he's met anyone or had an affair. Speak in a very calm voice and watch his reactions. Calm yourself down before you talk to him. Talk to him with your brain, not your heart. He might not be leaving you, he might be just curious, but it still needs to be addressed.