My ex was nice,warm,caring,nurturing,compassionet and loving woman i had ever met. We went through a non contested divorce,i gave her everything she wanted.She wanted the divorce,not me.I wanted to work it out and seek counseling etc. But she just wanted out,i think she had been planning it for some time looking back.The papers are signed,i moved out and she has turned into this cold,mean,bit..ch. I don't understand why she has to be this way,we never argued about anything,i just gave her what she wanted dispite how much it hurt me.I wanted her to be happy.I was hoping we could remain friends at some level but its like she never existed.Is this her way of dealing with divorce even though she wanted it.Im confused as to why she has turned against me.Im a nice guy and she knows it.Is this some kinda pay back to make herself feel good. She seems so evil now
2007-06-11 01:56:03 · 17 answers · asked by Rodger M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
who knows, maybe you seem really casual during the break up and that hurt her.
2007-06-11 01:58:54 · answer #1 · answered by Jahpson 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a woman who has it seems for the most part to never knew what to do with a good man. I'm my lifetime I have had 3 great men to come in my life. I had so many issues through out that eventually I ran them away. I've never been married, I have been engaged twice yet I'm still single. I say all that to say that I have really missed out on all that I could have possibly had with one of these three men simply because I was abused an molested as a child. I'm 40 years old and I'm angry because of what a man did to me years ago. He took my innocent and I have never trusted a man period. I wish things could be different for me and I've done things that I'm not proud of. I have never known true love. Do I believe in it yes I do. Yet, I'm working on me now. No more relationships for me. I will give myself a year to find myself to love me as I am. So when you have a good man respect him treat him as your best friend. Trust is always the key in any relationship.
2015-06-07 02:59:12 · answer #2 · answered by Euchelia C 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have absolutely zero insight, I can tell. You have no idea why she divorced you. For years, maybe, she had been emotionally disconnecting from you. Sure, she was nice up to the end, but probably because she's just not a mean person. Apparently, she hoped that divorcing you would make you leave her alone, and now that she's divorced and you're STILL trying to be friends with her, she has given herself permission to give you the cold shoulder in the hopes that doing so will finally make you go away.
She doesn't want you around. She hasn't wanted you around for a very long time. Get the hint already!
2007-06-11 02:09:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Maybe you have done something she can not forgive or forget and every chance she has she'll make you pay for it. It may be aslo that she was just a gold digger int he first place or maybe that she didn't think you'd really divorce her but now that you have and gave her what she wanted she realizes it's too late and she really messed up. It's hard to tell why people do the things they do but if I were you go on with your life and don't put yourself around her so that she can treat you nasty. It's done and over with and the events that have taken place have taken place there is noting left to do now but to concintrate on your future and getting on with your own life... Don't question her motives or her actions she is aware of how she is treating you just don't give her the opportunity any more. Live life to the fullest, date and date many you're a single man and it's summer get out there and shake your booty!!
2007-06-11 02:08:20 · answer #4 · answered by sophia_of_light 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry this happened to you, dude. At this point, you're divorced, you've moved out, and it's time to move on. It wasn't your choice, but it's where you're at anyway. There's no point in burning energy trying to figure out why someone is the way they are. You can't change her and trying to be friends is a futile exercise in frustration and is bad for your mental health, so why torment yourself? Minimize contact with your ex to zero if you can, remember your lessons from the marriage, accept the fact that it's over, move ahead and find a woman who appreciates a nice, decent man in her life. They really are out there. And please don't lose your ability to trust. If you lose that, you've lost part of your humanity. Best to you.
2007-06-11 02:16:54 · answer #5 · answered by Charlie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry to hear your situation.......but as many others have been there...mine alittle more dramatic but over time you will look back and see it was not as great as You thought it was.....my X, I am sure to this day regrets everything he has done to HIMSELF........ not me....for I was not the one to throw in the towel and moved out........(with someone else and now he is stuck again)....only he lost a lot of respect from his own kid....he has turned into a very bitter person.....for yesterday in 3 years I bumped into him and realized Who is that person......he looks awful, a very unhappy person......really did not have much to say to him......for I was not going to waste my time on it..time is so precious.......for today I have become a much more loving, caring ,and understanding person.......yes l may be alone but l sure am not lonely.....l do what l want, how I want ,and when l want......l believe life should be lived without a lot of drama involved.....you will soon feel this way also.....l guarantee it........and you will be much happier knowing you have moved on at your own pace......yup......the wounds are mended and you will experience life in a different fashion for the first time ever.......I would not give up anything now for my life is a journey.......but not ready to reach it's destination.....
good luck with everything......oh and the friendship thing.....forget it.......won't happen....because you will not want that type of friend in your space.......
She is all about "control" and when she knows she is upsetting you she's loving every minute of your energy wasted......so start playing her game Take back your control of your life and just learn as she already has to ignore her........nobody wins in a separation or divorce......it is a great loss for both sides.....
2007-06-11 05:21:45 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are some really angry women in here... No wonder we see all these American guys going for foreign women. Ladies, chill out and take stock... I believe some people are just nasty no matter how nice you are to them and the best thing to do is to stay away from these individuals.
You have all these women blaming the guy even though he gave the woman everything she wanted...
2007-06-11 02:23:45 · answer #7 · answered by Black Ice 71 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She obviously has issues. Continue being nice, DON'T LET HER USE YOU. The relationship is over you don't need to be overly nice to her. The divorce is settled so adhere to it, if you signed anything and regret it now you have to live with it there is no way out. You seem like a great guy, don't stoop to her level just continue being the great guy you are and you will see yourself happy soon. She'll continue sucking at life as normal.
2007-06-11 02:04:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe she wanted you to fight for her. Or she could be feeling like she made a mistake but doesn't want to admit it. Even if you want a divorce it is still hard. She may need some time to adjust. I do feel bad for you however. Give her some space for awhile, maybe she will come around
2007-06-11 02:01:59 · answer #9 · answered by glbenner 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People act differently to stress. Maybe she is pissed off because she realizes now that their are not alot of nice guys out there and she messed up, or maybe, just maybe - she always was a bit.....ch and because you were nice, you chose to ignore/overlook that fact. either way, be happy and move on with your life, you have seen her true colors - is that what you really want in your life. be happy and have a good life, that is the best payback of all.
2007-06-11 02:01:39 · answer #10 · answered by brandi 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If she seems evil, its because she doesn't want you in her life anymore. Let her go, she doesn't want to be your friend.
Why do you want to be friends with someone who doesn't want to be your friend? Do you want to be a friend to every person you meet even though they don't care to be friends with you? If not, then why her, why this woman? Is it because she was your wife and you feel some sort of ownership or something? Let her go.
Why do some of you guys do that?!? When we've had enough, go away!!!! I've had troubles like this in my life and just short of filing charges for stalking; I've managed to get the creep to leave me alone.
2007-06-11 02:05:46 · answer #11 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋