Any married people out there think of watching their spouse getting it from someone else? Or does it turn you on to have your spouse watch you getting it?
2007-06-10 20:01:14 · 19 answers · asked by georgia boy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That would break my heart to see & it would make me feel very dirty if I did it....
2007-06-10 20:03:42 · answer #1 · answered by eluvsdmode 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you're thinking of swinging to avoid cheating, then you're doing it for the wrong reason. Swinging, IMHO, is fine if you're marriage is solid and this is something (recreational sex together) that both of you want to do as a couple. But if it's done to avoid cheating then you're saying that there is a problem in your relationship that either you or your spouse are thinking of cheating. My wife and I were in the 2nd boat. She was getting bored with our marriage and rather than confront the issue, I suggested that she could play with others while I was around. Bad move. While it was fun to watch her with other guys, "knowing" that she was mine, the boundaries to our fidelity gradually loosened. She went and had sex behind my back, and I did the same to her. Here we are, three years later, and she left me for some other guy a few months back. Don't be as negligent in your relationship as I was in mine: if you or your spouse are thinking of cheating, or thinking of swinging to avoid cheating, you have a problem. Get help before it's too late. I wish I had.
2007-06-11 04:03:20 · answer #2 · answered by Dick Jones 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
or... it could easily turn INTO cheating if one spouse decides they really dig someone and start seeing them emotionally outside the agreement.
It's happened to LOTS of "swingers"
Be warned, that's all I'm saying. I fyou think suggesting swinging will somehow magically "save" your marraige consider what all swinging couples say "you have to have a LOT of communication and trust to be able to do this, ans some couples still break up"
If you are considering cheating, then obviously communication and trust are lacking in your relationship. Which means "swinging" will only end badly for you. And that bad ending might not be in your favor...
2007-06-11 03:18:07 · answer #3 · answered by Cassandra G 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is both you have to talk about and agree 110% to.You both put rules into place that you agree on following them 100%. If one doesn't want to do it then you don't do it. May your spouse is board with the same old thing in bed.What attracted you both together in the same place,why don't you take her on date night's and treat her special eg have bunch nice flowers waiting at the restaurant table order her favorite drink that you both share.Take her some place where she loves going even you prefer that you weren't there do this from time to time. If you have kids why not leave them at the grandparents for a couple nights now and then.
2007-06-11 03:16:13 · answer #4 · answered by Kaye B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, swinging is never a great idea. It puts a strain on even the best of marriages eventually... swinging in a marriage that is already in trouble is a sure way to get to those divorce papers a whole lot quicker than having a secret affair.
2007-06-11 06:32:23 · answer #5 · answered by joellemoe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in my opinion, swinging is not a good alternative to cheating. Try counselling if you really want to know what's wrong with your marriage and if that honestly doesn't work, then divorce. There's nothing wrong with talking about your fantasies with your partner but acting them out is a very different story.
2007-06-11 03:19:49 · answer #6 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It definately is an alternative to cheating. We should know, we've tried it and it's changed our lives and spiced up our marriage. Read into it first before diving in. It's a different world.
2007-06-11 03:44:56 · answer #7 · answered by ediabullo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Usually one partner has the desire to do this type of thing and the other partner may particpate. Most of the time it ends up with a lot of residual emotional baggage that is hard to shake. Just don't do it.
2007-06-11 04:25:53 · answer #8 · answered by ZenMonkey 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that's weird personnally. I don't really have such a strong sex addiction that I need to cheat or swing. I suggest thinking about what you are after in relationships before doing either.
2007-06-11 03:05:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Swinging is cheating, stop lying to yourself. You should watch the movie "Summer of Sam" it's pretty badass.
2007-06-11 03:05:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Umm is there a difference? I would much rather my husband divorce me then go get with someone else any other way and he is in for a HUGE a**kicking.
2007-06-11 03:07:34 · answer #11 · answered by Yep it's me 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋