Why are black women often insulted if, as a black male, you are not attracted to that particular black woman?

Question

I recently had an odd, yet interesting experience with a very aggressive, overbearing black woman who simply thought she was god's gift to men and that i should naturally be attracted to her, especially since she is black. when she realized that i wasn't kidding about not being the least bit interested in her, she asked me if i was gay. i explained to her that, gay or straight, i didn't like overbearing women with attitude and huge chips on their shoulders, regardless of their race or ethnicity. This isn't the first time i've had such an experience with a black woman, but this was a particularly annoying case. While i am black and have no qualms with dating black women, i am not at all afrocentric, and i did not grow up here in this country dealing with these sorts of racial issues. why is it such a huge deal here?

thanks all for your input- though i think you've totally missed my point.

wow, i see this needs a bit more clarification....
(this is fun!) it is not at all about race for me- people in Holland don't make such a big issue out of race, and i was surprised when this particular woman DID. She attacked me verbally, saying that i hated black women, just like a lot of other black men did. This is of course not true, but this woman seemed to think that was the issue at hand. I have dated women from all races (including many black women, two of whom I nearly married), as Holland is very multicultural, and I thought the U.S. would be the same. Apparently a false assumption!

Anyway, I hope this clears up my question, and I apologize if I have stepped on anyone's toes!

Answer 1

Now, it may be that that black woman in particular just thinks wayyy too highly of herself.... (good for you for putting her in her place) but..some black women think that you should automatically be with them because theyre black for the simple fact that in this country many black women feel that other races are "stealing" whats left of the "good" available black men... why this is? im not sure...i suppose these women have some deep rooted issues and insecurities with themselves to begin with and when they see a woman of another race walking around with a "good" black man they get jealous because that woman has what they desire. Its all pretty ridiculous to me but maybe thats just because im confident and secure with myself.

Answer 2

I'm a white woman... and I don't care who you or anyone else dates. If you're "generally" attracted to one race over another, you're just like the majority of people. Look how many white men mostly (or always) date white women. Nobody questions "why" this is. That remark about perpetuating white dominance is ridiculous. That's like saying a black man who dates a white woman is trying to "get back at Master" or something. Gimme a break. It does seem a little racist to me for someone to say they "strictly" date one race, without giving consideration to anyone else simply because of race. I mean, these things are superficial, right? Isn't what's inside a person what matters?

Answer 3

Almost all women get defensive when you are attracted to somebody who looks different. Women are taught we have to be everything to a man. A woman can't take it when a man wants something she can't be.

It's harder for a black woman because she has a unique look. Hispanics, for instance, have features of white, black, asian, indian all mixed together. It's less of an issue. Now that more ethnicities are mixed together, straight up white women will develop a bigger chip about it.

Instead of putting her down, just be understanding.
Aggresiveness is a survival skill. So is confidence. You need to chill. If you want a woman to calm down, then give her what she needs.

EDIT: Nobody said your question was about race. Your question was about why some black women appear insulted. You need to understand a few things about women AND race to get your answer.

Answer 4

Who cares who you date, why would you with all the racist bigoted attitude on here from trailer trash would you trash black women? I am almost positive you are white and trying to aggravate. i cannot believe anyone can be that ignorant and stupid...You need to be a man in control good for you..but who cares..find a passive white or any other color woman for you dear.

Answer 5

It looks as if there are people who believe they're entitled to someone because the person is of their race. Years ago, I came across a couple of black males feeling that it's all right for them to date interracial, but black women are to sit around and wait for them.

Answer 6

I'm sure most black women could care less who you date-I mean honestly-and if you experienced a couple bad stares does that mean you should generalize the wombs that gave you birth? It sounds like you need someone to care who you date, that way you'll feel in demand.

You 'd be surprided how many woman black white and other could care less.

Answer 7

Since you are a black male are you not offended when people ask questions that start: Why do black guys... .? Statements that classify all people in a race, or country, or religion are made by bigots. And your question.....even if you are a black guy....is the statement of a bigot. It is even more offensive because it is against your own race. I think, of all the people in our country who suffer from prejudice, black women have it the hardest. And your statement is offensive, and I am not black.

Answer 8

I am darn goodlooking, but I wouldnt give a rats a55 whether black men find me attractive or not. I have been approached by a lot of black men over the years, but I am not interested in black men.

Answer 9

First off black women believes the same propaganda that white women are spoon fed about black men.... And until that kind of propaganda is stop women of all races will continue to fall victim to bull-crap that many white men have been feeding the world................. Also it say a lot about the mental security that the white man seems to lack, because he feel that he has to save the world from his own black ancestors... Now is that weird or what how do to save all white women from your own ancestors...................................

Answer 10

I wouldn't care at all. Why limit yourself to one time of candy when there is a variety. As they say I also like variety. Remaining only in your race is boring and one should not limit themselves. Don't worry about these women they are projecting their insecurities on you. Do what makes u happy. Coming from a black woman who has no problem seeing black men date out.