Should i get MAD, get GLAD, or get EVEN?

Question

how about YOU?

is it OK to get Mad .. when?
is it OK to pretent ur Cool though Mad ... when?
is it OK to make other people feel how they make you Mad .... when?

:-)

Answer 1

I think given my choices, I should just get glad. Anger is usually transient and represents a frustrated goal or is an "initial reaction" that lies atop some other emotion.....unless it's pathological or fixated. Getting even?? Well, that will likely involve some retaliation and a lot of drama. So, fine to be mad, but it shouldn't guide your behaviour or stay put regarding something or someone for too long. Usually the anger subsides, we move onto thinking, maybe wobble back to feeling, then we act. It takes a lot of energy to be angry and when it guides behaviour, trouble awaits for not only yourself.

I think if you don't know a person well, it's probably best to pretend you're cool, but really angry. But, as long as you stay calm, speak assertively, maybe add a little humour in to the conversation, you can pretty much tell someone to f*ck off without actually saying it and without evoking a heated argument. People stop listening and thinking when others yell and scream. It just becomes an idiotic, brainless, emotional war.

I think if you know the person you are angry at, you might feel comfortable enough to express your anger in a more "raw" form. If the person knows you well enough, they may know not to personalize it. But, the crux of the confrontation still needs to be discussion.

I think you need to let others know if and when they make you angry. Why should you have to carry the burden? Tooooo much energy and for what reason? A calm, assertive discussion will work wonders to dissolve anger. Once an issue is revolved, anger will dissipate. If a person is not capable of a discussion, then, well, I suppose I'd have to weigh out whether I valued my relationship with that person. If I didn't, I don't think I'd care much about what they thought and probably wouldn't make much time for them in the future. Sometimes it's just not worth the energy to attempt resolution about something with someone you don't really care about, whose opinion doesn't really matter to you, or whose day-to-day functioning does not affect your own. At least, that's how I feel and that's what I think....

Answer 2

Get prepared. Speaking for myself, I think that if someone
is trying to get a rise out of me for an unobvious reason
then I should send mixed signals at least until I have
a better understanding of the reason. I mention this
because you are apparently talking about emotions,
and emotions are usually best kept between friends.
However, you also mentioned mad, so I am assuming
that perhaps the individual who is provoking your
emotions is not a friend(I could be wrong). Knowing
an individual's emotional triggers is a powerful tool,
so handing over that information is not in an individual's
best interest.

Answer 3

It is better to hold your temper than to have to apologize for losing it. But there are times when it's not temper so much as righteous indignation. You have a right to be angry at injustice. You have a duty to fight evil. But in both cases, getting "mad," as in losing your composure, is bound to affect your judgment.

As to the line "don't get mad, get even," remember that vengeance is not the point, but justice is. Vengeance has a tendency to go overboard, tip the scales the other way, and start long-standing feuds.

I say don't pretend to be cool when you are angry, learn to keep your cool in spite of your anger. Use your cool-headed good judgment to bring justice to the wrongdoer.

Answer 4

Whichever works for you in the situation. But if you get mad, keep it to yourself until you can use the energy effectively, knowing how - and until then forget it. It never pays to alert the quarry, or to shoot yourself in the foot. There's no profit in merely getting even - focus on making those who would annoy you more wary of you (best done by helping them shoot themselves in the foot, as they will, because most people repeat inappropriate behavior). With opponents it's best to appear untouched. A laugh, or being ignored, disconcerts most people more than a scowl - but there's a time to affect being at least annoyed, as a warning when they transgress a second time. Never merely react. But with those you count under your tent one must let them know, calmly, when they stand on your toes; and then discuss it. If they're worth keeping, they'll be able to do that without defensiveness or aggression - that's how you know they're worth keeping. One may lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink - and if it won't, and can't learn, let it go.

Answer 5

You will experience all these emotions because they are another process of the Heart, body and soul.

Each one will have many levels taking you from one step to the next. Let yourself feel all of it, analyze each experience as it comes, because they all will.

There is no escape from the grieving process of the heart...

Other wise how else will you find resolve.

I am feeling a lot of the same... Right now it is sorrow and anger.

Time will heal it all, but it is hard to wait, especially when you know it was all in God's hands in the first place. What we are going through is already mapped out, try to find your spiritual center as often as possible.

I know it's in you, I feel you in all your words... I feel your soul, your spirit...

Answer 6

Most people aggravate themselves by thinking over and over about a situation that provoked anger. When you stop thinking about X, the anger abates.

Revenge is cool. Just be prepared for retaliation.

Answer 7

I think it's OK to do all three. I get mad when I do stupid things. I get glad when something nice happens to me. I get even when someone takes advantage of me.

Answer 8

None of the above.

Best is to get revenge.

Best revenge is to have a good life and watch the offender squirming in the mud as a result of their own actions.

Answer 9

dude, do all three at the same time.