I am a 32yr old woman very happily married, I have two very beautiful children, four yrs and eight yrs old. Here is the deal, my husband is an excellent lover. He makes me feel wonderful, he open doors pulls out my chair helps me out of the chair and very pasionate in bed.OMG he is my night in shinning armor........but I don't want sex. I find my husband very attractive I just don't want sex. I loath at the fact when the time comes when hubby is wanting sex. Not that I hate having sex with him, just sex in general. I went to dr and he said my limbido is normal. So what could be causing the attiude change towards sex. I mean I had always had a pretty good drive but it is gone now. I love to cuddle and hold my husband I love to rub on him caress him but sex I HATE it. What could be causing this change towards sex? Is this normal?
2007-06-09 11:38:05 · 25 answers · asked by stacy j 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My husband and I are very conserative christians we would never watch porn(ewww) or drink or do any thing that would make us feel less of a person. We do not need those things to have a good marriage. We have a wonderful marriage we love each other very much. He is not complaining acualy he is very understanding and very patient. He would never go outside of our marriage he is not that type of man. We understand sex is not the basis of our marriage.
2007-06-09 11:46:20 · update #1
We are conserative people but when it has come down to our sex lives we are both very generous with ourselves. If he wants oral then he gets it if I want oral than I get it and it's not an awww do I have to do it. I'm very happy to do it so is he. Yes I do have orgasims GREAT orgasims I just don't like sex. Oh and yes we have brought toys in the issue I don't like them I want the real thing, my husband.
2007-06-09 11:53:49 · update #2
I'm not on birth control my husband was fixed, he didn't want me to have to go through the pain of being fixed. It is much easier for a man than a woman, so he did it for us.
2007-06-09 12:06:55 · update #3
I totaly agree with Tweety but as for me I think sex is an awesome gift from God to be enjoyed between a married man and woman. I'm not ashamed to say I have sex w/ hubby I don't have a problem w/ sex asking the question on Yahoo should proove that. Not all Christians feel sex is bad. Acually it's a great work out LOL and gets rid of stress you have had for that week. No really sex is great I just don't want it.
2007-06-09 15:23:22 · update #4
Stacy: Mother of Two,married,homemaker,cook,maid,taxi driver.. I think you are tired and need some one on one time with your husband... plus you need to take time out for yourself,go back to school,work... You need to be recharged and excited by life,love, and the art of making love with passion to your night in shinning armor..... If MOM is happy everyone is happy....
2007-06-09 11:52:17 · answer #1 · answered by MJ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It might be that you have pretended to yourself that you are a satisfied participant in sex. Be honest with yourself: are you truly satisfied? Do you orgasm regularly? If not, then that might be it. You don't look forward to having sex because although you are emotionally satisfied by it, it may not satisfy you physically anymore. I could be way off, but this is just a guess. Try switching it up with ne wpostions, toys, etc. Just because you need to bring an "enhancer" to bed, it doesnt mean you are weird, freaky or anything. Try and find someone that is hosting a sex toy party in your area, or better yet...kick the kids and hubby out for a night and host one yourself. You can go online and have a representative from a sex toy company come and host the party. You'll be so surprised the friends of yours that will want to come...no pun intended. They are so much fun and not cheesy or unclassy in any way. You will leave feeling the need to have sex, plus you'll get some great ideas and will get the chance to purchase a thing or two in the privacy of your, or someone else's, home. Good luck!
P.S. The last sex toy party I went to (been to 2) therw were women that were 50 yrs old there! No need to let your age stop you!
2007-06-09 18:44:50 · answer #2 · answered by meggybucks1 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If the problem isn't physical, since your libido is normal. Then the problem is psychological. I hate to say it, but alot of times Christians have hang ups about sex, thinking that it's wrong, bad, dirty, etc.
You have been blessed with a gem of a man. It would be a shame to not express your love for each other in a physical way. Get to the bottom of why you hate sex. The answer is within you. Once you know why, you can work on it.
2007-06-09 22:16:34 · answer #3 · answered by Tweety 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ive heard of women with the attitude. Sounds like you two have a very good relationship. Since you dont like sex, get him off in a way that youo enjoy also. I sure he wont turn down a good bj. Maybe there will come a point when you just cant stand it anymore and you pull him onto you and... you know. :)
For now, do somehting that akes himm happy as well as makes you comfortable. Straining yourself to please him can end up being a bad thing.
2007-06-09 18:44:19 · answer #4 · answered by for me to know, you to not... 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wish I could tell you. Depression or a lot of other problems could be the fault. Seek the advice of a therapist. If you husband is into sex and your not a willing participant, chances are he will be soon seeking sex with someone else. That is just the nature of the beast. My wife and I had great sex until our first child was born. After that I was lucky if I sex once every 30 days. Six months later I began an affair for sex. I still loved my wife but this affair took its toll and now we are divorced.
2007-06-09 18:43:36 · answer #5 · answered by CRAIG C 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like your hormones are changing. Parenthood can do that to women. Just imagine all the changes your body has been through in the last eight years. Changes in hormones from normal, to pregnant, to nursing, and all the way back again.
Have you tried any type of aphrodesiac? There are herbal remedies, like Damiana, that may help. Even a glass of wine or a toke (if you're into that) may help you focus and enjoy.
2007-06-09 18:43:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your doctor was a physician? I think it may be time for you to see the psychologist. If that doesn't help, then maybe you just plain out don't like it and never will. Some women just get bored of having sex with the same person. I wish you the best of luck.
2007-06-09 18:43:12 · answer #7 · answered by Rosie aka Rosie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pray,sometimes things happen to cause us to ask God. What is wrong? Your marriage is going too well,did you think it would last that way before the spirits of darkness would try to throw a wrench in it.....
No desire for the act of sex? The devil is a liar!
All men do not cheat,but soon what they crave, if not getting at home...gets the best of them. There is always some crazy woman waiting to pounce on his intentions. He knows when you are faking, so get a grip! This is a alert!
2007-06-09 18:55:00 · answer #8 · answered by God is love. 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if his breath stinks? does his smell turn you off? does he have habits that now gross you out to the point where it turns you off? and first off you lied you said that you were happily married. If your husband does not turn you on anymore then you are not happy. It is crazy b/c my ex was amazing in bed but after a while little thin gs about him turned me off even if i over looked some of the things that i didn't like about him i still would melt every time we made love but! it got to the point where i just could not stand it anymore. I loved him as a person but call it selfish but i could not take it. Maybe this is your problem and there are some things in your relationship that you are not sharing that is making it hard to give you advice. you went to the doc he says things were fine so spill the beans lady!
2007-06-09 18:46:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I agree sex is a great work out.
Melgirl and my sex life is actually pretty good.
So I'm not exactly sure how to answer your problem.
Could it be possible that you are going through an early stage of menopause?
Possibly a form of depression?
I think as long as you and your hubby be open and honest,
then your relationship should overcome any sexual complications.
2007-06-10 08:17:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋