My husband is a Bully and I want a Divorce?

Question

I have been married for 10 years and have been a stay at home mom the entire marriage. I have 3 young sons 8yrs and younger. I want a divorce, my husband demands that if I dont loose 30 pounds (i'm not that over weight, my weight is 150 and i'm 5'7") and have sex with him 4 times a week in various public places that he will make my life miserable. My question is this, how much Allimony can i recieve so i can get a divorce and stay in my home while i go to school so I can provide for my boys. I already estimated I would get about $2200 in child support, With his Gross income being anywhere between $70,000 and $92,000 a year, what can i get for allimony in the state of arizona?

Answer 1

You can get alimony.

Alimony Law in Arizona

Alimony Guidelines.

Arizona does not consider marital misconduct when awarding alimony, but will consider all relevant factors, including the following guidelines:

1. The standard of living established during the marriage.
2. The duration of the marriage.
3. The age, employment history, earning ability and physical and emotional condition of the spouse seeking alimony.
4. The ability of the spouse from whom alimony is sought to meet his or her needs while meeting those of the spouse seeking alimony.
5. The comparative financial resources of the spouses, including their comparative earning abilities in the labor market.
6. The contribution of the spouse seeking alimony to the earning ability of the other spouse.
7. The extent to which the spouse seeking alimony has reduced his or her income or career opportunities for the benefit of the other spouse.
8. The ability of both parties after the divorce to contribute to the future educational costs of their mutual children.
9. The financial resources of the party seeking alimony, including marital property apportioned to such party, and such party's ability to meet his or her needs independently.
10. The time necessary to acquire sufficient education or training to enable the party seeking alimony to find appropriate employment and whether such education or training is readily available.
11. Excessive or abnormal expenditures, destruction, concealment or fraudulent disposition of community, joint tenancy and other property held in common.

Reasons for Awarding Alimony.

A court in Arizona may grant an award of alimony for either spouse for any of the following reasons if it finds that the spouse seeking alimony :

1. Lacks sufficient property to provide for his or her reasonable needs;
2. Is unable to support himself or herself through appropriate employment or lacks the earning ability to support him or herself;
3. Is the custodian of a child whose age or condition is such that the custodian should not be required to seek employment outside the home;
4. Contributed to the educational opportunities of the other spouse; or
5. Had a marriage of long duration and is of an age which may preclude the possibility of gaining employment adequate to support himself or herself.

-From 25-319 of the Arizona Statutes.

Answer 2

alimony is becoming a thing of the past...if you are of an age where you can be employed, you are not going to get alimony. Arizona uses about 11 different factors when it comes to deciding alimony, but the big one is going to be your age...and I'm guessing you are still at an employable age...so don't count on it - at all. Just because you are a stay at home mom doesn't mean you can't go to a temp agency and get a position in an office.

Watch how money hungry you get...it can seriously come back and bite you in the rear end. You seem to be of the impression you will get the kids most of the time, but what if he chooses to change his job, and be more available so that he can have the kids 50% of the time, reducing your child support drastically...and what if because you go tocourt looking like all you want is his wallet, he refuses to pay for anything...including child support for months (it's very common)

You need to think more about how you would do it of you had NO money coming at all...

In today's divorces, 90% of the time the house has to be sold unless one or the other spouse can afford to buy the other out. You aren't in a postion to be able to do that,and hecan refuse to pay your mortgage....OR pay the mortgage in lieu of child support...

You may want to consider trying marriage counseling over divorce...your situation being divorced is not going to be as rosy financially as you think it is...

Answer 3

What an unreasonable demand! Your weight sounds ok for your height.

I am sure tht HIS physique is not perfect. Find something about his body to hate, and demand that he fixes it. Make a big deal about it. Let him know that it is so unbearable that you simply cannot live with it any longer. That way, he will know what it feels like to have his body criticized.

If you do not want to take that approach, then get a responsible friend to talk some sense into him.

By the way, there is NOTHING unreasonable about him wanting to have sex 4 times a week. You two should already have been doing that!

Answer 4

Unless Y!A is jam packed with lawyers you won't get any help here.

Maybe find a family member you can stay with and pack yourself and the kids off while he's at work, then get yourself an attorney who will be able to help you with everything.

If he wants an anorexic hooker let him have one - you're worth more than a jerk like him.

Answer 5

first you need to ask yourself whats more important,money and how much i get or do i want to worry more about my kids and get them into a healthy safe enviroment?being a single parent is hard but whats more important,money or your kids?thats the question you should ask.i would leave him right away.what happens if you stay and your kids start acting like him?not wanting to sound mean on answer but you asked.personally i dont believe in alimony,only child support.think about it.if you divorce someone why should they keep supporting you by going to work when you can work to?i know i know i will get thumbs down but im entitled to my own opinion .

Answer 6

See an attorney. It is not called alimony anymore in most states it is called maintenance. Your attorney will need to prove that you stayed home to raise the children and furhered his career. It will probably be only temporary so you can get an education to support yourself. He souinds like a real pig. Be sure and get a good attorney. Ask around and get the meanest most cut throat one you can find. Protect yourself.

Answer 7

Get out of this situation as soon as you can. I have been in a similar situation and over time you will feel useless and feel it is all your fault. Pack your bags and go whilst the children are still young enough to forget all this. Its your only salvation. Your self respect and sanity is surely more important than allimony.

Answer 8

maybe,u should call SAM (1 800 call SAM) also you should ask him if there are better job oppertunitys in a different state(pick a good one) and that you should move there.pick one were a familly member lives and were there is a good subway and were it is crowded.like new york city.lastly move there and when he is at work or a business meeting,take your kids and leave.put a note saying that you and the kids are going to stay at hawaii and will never be back.either he will forget about you or chace you.

Answer 9

I have no idea but I'm sure you can find it all over the internet or just talk to an attorney. They know all of that. He sounds like a creep and no, you are nowhere close to over weight!

Answer 10

Since you have never had an income in the marriage. You will get enough to support you and the kids until you can become self sufficient. In most cases this is half.