True "Two-Spirit"?

Question

Why do lesbians in particular insist that women who are bisexual identify as lesbian? I would think if you've been oppressed and discriminated against you would be mindful of doing this to others. Is this to make them feel "more comfortable." I had a lesbian friend say to me recently, "You're in that gray zone." Gray zone? Being bi-sexual means just that. There's no confusion on my part. I was married to a man once, brief , big mistake, but I realized that I'm not the "marrying type." I've also lived with two women.

I am attracted to women and men. I prefer the sisterhood, commonality, spirituality, and social structure of women, irregardless of whom they choose to have sex, partner, live with or love because of my matriarchal upbringing. Men, after a short time, bore me because of their tendency to be one diminisonal and lack of emotional depth. (Generalization? Sorry my experiences)

I always say, "I'm not lesbian, but I'm not exactly straight either."

Oh, by the way, I'm almost at the half-century mark, so there's no "confusion." I've known I had the attraction for both since childhood, and definitely adolescence, but often allowed myself to be "pigeon-holed" into a category to be accepted.

The joy and freedom of being "50" is you "come into you own!"

Answer 1

I know how you feel hun. I'm bi and have been for about 15 years. I was before I knew what it was. I just knew that I liked boys and girls. I had to look it up in a dictionary... I know I'm a geek! :) I always say I'm about 60 percent gay, up to 90 percent depending on who I'm looking at!
A gay friend of mine said to me a few days ago "I don't understand you bi's you're living with a man, you're happy, you're straight." I responded "yeah I'm happy with him, but I really miss the @#$&*." Not writing down what I said!
The sad truth is that straights think we're just pervs and gays think we're riding the fence. But we're making head way, just like everyone is. I just remember to live by the Wiccan code: do as ye will but harm none.
Best of luck to you!

Answer 2

I hear ya there, not that I agree completely...but that's probably because my experiences have been different.
But I still get what you're saying.

I personally identify as "Gay Female" I am bisexual, I have been married to a man, although briefly as well, but have also been in rich and fofilling relationships with both men and women.
For more than ten years I have been with my current partner who happens to be a woman. I don't call myself a "lesbian" because I'm not. I know that if (gods forbid) anything were to happen and my partner and I split up, that the chance that I would find myself attracted to either a male or a female is about 50/50.

I prefer the company of women, but I'm not exclusive. I adore the men in my life and cherish their experiences as well.

I'm definitely not straight...but did for many years pretend to be on the assumption that if I tried hard enough I could "cure" myself of my "bent."
It took me years to figure out that there's nothing wrong with being "bent" and to honor that part of myself.

Answer 3

I am also like you... been married (also brief) ...been in a long lasting lesbian relationship that was for 6 years... and now I am single. I don't say I am a lesbian, I prefer bi-sexual. I believe as you do, it doesn't matter what the sex is of the person I fall in love with... what is meant to be is....
I am proud of you for speaking out...

Answer 4

Okay, this is what I don't get about you supposed "bisexual" women. Throughout your question, you refer to men only negatively...
being with a man was a "big mistake",
"men...bore me",
"I prefer...women"
Then you glamourize the traits of women, and seem to be quite proud of your attraction to them.
So....why again are you *not* a lesbian?

Answer 5

I know cause you are still trying to see what u are.

Answer 6

be thankful