If you were cheated on, would u give 2nd chance?

Question

Just curious.

WOW! Soo many great answers! This is going to be tough voting for the best one. If Yahoo allowed me to give away my points, most all of you would get 10 points of mine.

Answer 1

no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no...

should i continue???

i forgiven before to try to save a marriage it doesnt work.

cheaters and beaters are repeaters...

once they are given a second chance they will do it again and again and again.... they learn to hide it better.

Answer 2

I did forgive. It takes a lot of time and commitment on the cheater and the one who was cheated on. If you choose to try to forgive (remember forgiveness is for yourself), do not asks specifics (you really do not need to know). Also, if you are both working on the marriage do not keep bringing up the cheating, move forward. If your partner (the one who cheated) is willing to tow the line (call when late, come right home etc. and account for every part of they day) until you do not question any longer where you partner is. They you might be able to move forward, if your partner is not willing to go though with this, don't give a 2nd chance.

Answer 3

For me, the bottom line would be why did he cheat. If he isn't getting his needs met at home- and no I don't mean just sex although it is a powerful motivator!- and looked elsewhere than yes, I would give a second chance if I was willing to change whatever was my contributing part.
If it was for the thrill, the danger, lust or boredom than no. It would just keep happening.
It would take strong commitment and willingness to forgive, but I don't know that forgettig would be possible.

Good question- you sparked quite a range of answers!

Answer 4

I did. But, the relationship was never the same afterwards. I never fully trusted him afterwards and was always on-guard and looking out for my own security. It turned from an us relationship to a looking out for myself relationship. I hear that some people actually do or can move on from infidelity, but I think that both people have to really want it and the offender has to really prove some things. Most people just give lip service: I'm so sorry, I promise.... That's not enough. If you find that you are now looking over your shoulder and checking all the time, then this is probably what you'll do all your life. If you're happy living like that, then keep doing what you're doing. But, sooner or later, you'll probably get worn out.

Answer 5

No

One can make many mistakes. But, to forget your significant other, and throw honor and vows and commitment out the window, is to make a grave of mistake. Cheating is a form of stealing, it involves every aspect of a persons personality. Not only are lines crossed emotionally, physically and through lack of honor and respect. I know that many have attempted to renew their vows/feelings/commitments after having cheated.....but, once a person crosses the line the remembrance of it....always remains. We have but one life, and I will not.....would not, compromise the richness of it, by continuing on with a cheater. Our lives are so short. Why waste even a small portion of it on someone that does not honor me in every sense?

Answer 6

It recently happened to me, and I did give her a second chance because I love her.
We're getting engaged soon, we've talked A LOT about everything, and we have plenty of trust on each other.
We've also been going out for almost 7 years.
I also cheated on her a few years ago - and she knows this. It was all (both) a mistake.

Answer 7

Well it would be determined by the circumstances of the affair.If it was a one time deal that could be forgiven. It would of course hurt,but with time could be forgiven. Along time affair I don't know. I love my husband dearly and with all my heart, I think could eventually forgive , but it would shatter me for a while.We have know each other sense high school and he is my best friend. I have always trusted him and he me. Never given a reason not to.And never given him a reason not to.

Answer 8

I was cheated on and took him back believing he had changed and was going to continue to earn my trust back. I was fooled again....but at least if you give it another chance and it happens again you can ALWAYS look back and hold your head up high and know you gave it every opportunity possible. It's not easy getting burned a second time, but it beats wondering "what if" the rest of your life.

Answer 9

Like the saying goes "Once a cheater, always a cheater". I dont believe in second chances when it comes to cheating. Nobody wants to suffer the same heartbreak more than once.

Answer 10

This question is a matter of the heart. It has been said that love is blind,and over and over it is proven to be true.
Yes, If i love the person who cheated on me i would give a second chance to redeem himself but i will not make it easy for him.

Answer 11

I used to say no, never. But then I met a couple that quickly became some of my best friends. The wife had cheated. When he husband found out he went to her, and they cried together. She was very sorry. What he said to her just melted my heart. He said, "Baby, what did I do to send you into the arms of another man? How can I be better? How can I help make us better?" He loves her so much, and I just love them. So I hope I could be as understanding and as loving as he was to her. I hope I'll never have to find out.