My husband has been acting cold towards me lately. He still treats me with respect but things just don't seem the same. He told me two nights ago that he thought about leaving me before. Right now, he doesn't know what he wants in life. I'm scared he'll leave but I won't stop him if he does. He proposed counseling. Is that a sign that he wants to work things out? What sould I do since I no longer know what to think. I love him with my heart and soul, but I won't let him hurt me. Any sugestions and advice is appreciated.
2007-06-07 23:02:23 · 15 answers · asked by K9Girl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First of all, you need to explain what type of relation you both have. Is there alot of friction? Or things are tensed up?
Your husband seems to be at a stretch, wants to be with you but there might be certain things that are bothering him & have reached the point where he cant hold on any more
He is confused, but as he respects you, then just dont let him go. Try taking a break from routine, spend some time out & try to listen each other; then go for counselling.
Certainly, your relation ship is not that bad & mending ends is easier at this stage.
2007-06-07 23:12:02 · answer #1 · answered by izebergali 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is thinking about it; has seriously thought about it, though he has weighed the options and feel like leaving you might not be the smartest decision he has made in a long time (The reason for seeing a counsellor). Break-ups are never easy especially with children involved; that is if you guys have any, chances are he is seeing someone else who is pushing him to walk from you. Never give him a reason for leaving; let him do it himself with all the guilt and confusion that comes with hurting someone, you "love". Most people confuse possessiveness with love, so at times they can't imagine the person they thought was all theirs is actually happy with other people. Love means not locking someone somewhere they don't feel comfortable in. Try giving each other space, go for vacation somewhere far. Then if he will still feel the same, see someone who can help. Eventually, he might leave you, so be prepared emotionally, right now.
2007-06-08 07:04:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he wants to go to a counselling session with you, then he wants to work it out.
But you really need to sit down with him and tell him how you feel, ask him how he feels and why he has been acting the way he has and get things up in the air before they all explode and turn out worse than they already are.
Spend some time together, go on a romantic holiday to try and work out your issues without work/friends/family getting involved or in the way.
Hope you work it out, i'm sure that you will x
2007-06-08 06:08:02 · answer #3 · answered by Yellow 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well a counselor will help you put all of these issues in a logical easy to understand order. Millions of couples have problems and get professional help--millions don't and wind up destroyed and broken. hey, if it is over it is over--that is life--better luck next time. You will find that the biggest issue in maritial trouble is communication--no talk until it is too late--then it gets crappy and sad. Get a grip--get to the pro for help--if your husband wants to go--say bye bye. You cannot fight the inevitable. So why be miserable--find a nice guy and move on---life is just too short for problems--get tough and insist on a decision from him--got that?? Good luck, lady
2007-06-08 06:12:40 · answer #4 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
at least he is trying to get counseling. That means he still loves you and still wants things to work. There is hope. My friend has to drag her husband to marriage counseling.. So it is definitely a good sign that he is willing to do this. I suggest you go for the counseling. It can really help.
2007-06-08 06:06:02 · answer #5 · answered by Beeg 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
MEN NEED SPACE.
nothing personal.
sometimes men need time to heal from the harsh
life we live. We work hard, without complaining and
need our time to heal without interference.
use this time to make the most of it and go to
a fun sport with your girlfriends without cheating on him.
when u get back from your 2 day vacation, you'll see
he is better now that he has time to heal, and more
importantly, you two will talk alot and spend more time
together.
best to let him heal from the hard work that he does,
not only for you but for all the people he has to deal
with like relatives and coworkers. some dudes are
so stressed out they would strangle someone. all they need
is time to sleep and heal from the cold world that
treats them shitty.
when you get back fully rested so will he be feeling better.
unlike women, men are honest on their feelings,
if we feel like crap it shows, we cannot hide it well.
yet we do our best to fake it and cover up our own pain.
but we are bankin on the sleep we get undisturbed
at night to feel better the next day of bs to tolerate.
laters,
Ric.
Thats why men are not always happy.
sometimes we need our time to heal,
sometimes we shutdown for days, othertimes,
it could be weeks, or longer. Until the sleep is fulfulled.
remember,
its NOT personal.
its our bearlike way of getting our hibernation sleep.
Understand this. before we dated women,
there was a long time of sleep alone done to
heal ourselves before dating.
Then we dated at a fully rested state of mind,
and then women liked us for being fun.
but woman forgot man only this way because
he got sleep. u take away sleep, Man cranky.
women understand. woman smart.
laters,
caveman ric.
2007-06-08 06:19:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yea it is a sign.. he does want 2 make things right so work towards it..try n make ur life wid him more appreciable... de reason tat u dnt want 2 loose him is a gud thing... talk 2 him ask him wats on his mind.. u myt learn many things u dint knw...fear will get u no wher..b positive n work urslf thru it
2007-06-08 06:07:57 · answer #7 · answered by nik g 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go to the counseling! You're very lucky that your husband wants to do this. Make and appointment today!
My ex husband refused counseling, no matter how much I begged him to go. I took that as my cue and left.
2007-06-08 07:53:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
its mid life crisis.. they feel hopeless and they'll start blaming the ones who love them and need them the most as the reason why they are feeling this way.
all the best in the counselling. at least he got brains to ask for help.
2007-06-08 08:01:24 · answer #9 · answered by sweetashess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he does does want to work things out especially if he suggested counseling... give it a go!!Give him a chance
2007-06-08 06:08:29 · answer #10 · answered by Babybear 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋