How would you feel if your child grew up to be a "nobody"?

Question

Is it "normal" for parents to expect their children to grow up and be "successful" career wise? Shouldn't you love/support your child regardless of if he/she is a waiter/waitress or a doctor?

I guess what I'm wondering is...is it a part of a parent's "job" to make sure their children make it monetarily? Or is it something else...are expections healthy, or just something lacking in parent's life and they are projecting to children?

Answer 1

a parent can only say & do so much for a child .When it all boils down the child is the one to do what they can to live up to their parents expectations.If the child doesn't want to become sucessful that's the childs choice.Just except the child for being the person that he/she is.That's all you can really do.

Answer 2

It's important to direct and guide your children and give them a good foundation, (ie; faith, finance, good sense, and common sense) mixed with lots of love and cuddles. Ultimately though, they have to make their own choices.
My oldest sd is in college ... but I let her know if she decided to have a paper route we'd still love her the same.
There is a fine line in life. It's important to love your kids, no matter what. However, that doesn't always mean we're going to love what they do or don't do.
Hummmm, comparing you to others is not a part of what I'm talking about here. Every person has their own drum beat.
Forcing a child to do something or having a child get involved with some activity with the wrong motives is also incorrect.
Lastly, don't compare your kid to yourself and attempt to live vicariously through them.
Hope all this helps.

Answer 3

very deep question... yes, I think all parents project themselves into there child as a sense of, "do over" and try to help their children be what they couldn't be or as good as they were.... is it healthy.. too a point but it can also be degrading if it is put onto them that they are nothing unless they do this or that or make x amount of $..

How parents act, or you perceive them to act or be is dependent upon those events that had sculptured them in their life and their mental capacity ie... people who lived through the depression put money under their mattress or buried in back yard and not in the bank.

so when you talk of parents, you are reflecting yourself into someone that has their own prejudices, ideas, life experiences that are not necessarily the most affirmative source for inspiration and guidance.... possibly the best thing a parent can do for us to succeed in life is to allow us to become independent of them and from them, to stand on our own two feet regardless if we are a waitress, plumber or president. To have a 30 year old adult sucking on the mama's teet financially or for mental support is wrong...

good question...

Answer 4

I'm not a parent yet, but I would probably be disappointed, because I'd try to raise them to be successful, and I'd think: did I do something wrong? However, there is a difference between for example being a dancer and being poor or dropping out of college and working as a waiter. I wouldn't be disappointed if my kid ended up poor but doing something that required work and talent, but I would be disappointed if they gave up and ended up doing nothing.

Most of the time kids with good backgrounds end up successful--basically the environment and parents' ideals do a lot for a child.

Answer 5

of course you should love and support them but it's understandable to want them to be successful. i have an older brother who's 32, with a little girl of his own, and still sucking off my parents who are in their 60's - whole other topic. i'm not sure what was expected of him, if anything. pushing them towards a specific career might not be healthy but giving them the desire to be successful and take care of themselves monetarily, that comes from a place of love and concern. i want to know my girls will be okay, not waiting for an inheritance check, if something happens to me later in life. i'll always worry about them but i'd rather it not be over money.

Answer 6

I would feel as if I had failed as a parent. Money does not equal success. Happiness does. So, if my child was happy earning a living doing what he loves, I would consider us to be "happy, successful, somebodies." The greatest gift you can give a child is your love and support along with a sense of pride in who they are.

Answer 7

That is a difficult question.
Of course you want your child to be self supporting and
sucessful but that does not always happen.As long as
you know that you did every thing possible to give your
child a good start in life the rest is up to them.
You can not beat yourself up if your child makes the wrong
choices in life.

Answer 8

No matter what a person chooses to do they will never be a nobody. It is a parents job to accept their children for who they are and support them on the journey

Answer 9

I actual have a monkey one i bought from objective. it is not a leash nevertheless. that's greater like a backpack with a string related to it. i've got in basic terms used it as quickly as and it replaced into at a crowded place. My daughter would not have a behavioral project to warrant a harness yet she has a bent to wander away whilst she sees something exciting. We plan on taking her to Disneyland quickly and that i will def. %. the harness for her so i don't lose her. various mothers and fathers who has particular desires infants makes use of them. i think of human beings ought to easily keep their impolite evaluations to themselves. If it replaced into considered abused then the manufacturers would not be able to sell them.

Answer 10

i have been thinking about that too. i think if a child fails in life it is parents' fault - they didn't teach him/her how to make it in real world, didn't teach how to be persistent and successful. i would be devastated if my children end up unemployed. it is like i lived my life without any perpose so it makes me a loser. if children are losers parents automatically become losers too