I want to marry a beautiful girl but she is poor and not a virgin?

Question

For my culture that is defected goods what should I do... My parent's will never aprove.

Answer 1

Hmmm, I doubt you will find many workable answers to your question here, though you seem to be getting a lot of insults.

So many Americans love to tell you that their way of life is the only way to live, yet many if not most know nothing about other countries and cultures, and frankly they just don't want to know. And many of them don't even think about the many different cultures in their own country. Those people insulting you probably know nothing about your culture and circumstances, yet they will happily tell you how you should live your life.

Of course you could always follow their uninformed advice. After all, the American model for a successful marriage would seem to be a short and hopefully happy marriage, followed some time later by a quickie divorce - that is normally how it goes in the good old US of A and many other western countries where about 1 in 3 marriages end in divorce.

Or you could think seriously whether YOU want to continue to follow in the traditions of your family and your culture. If you go ahead you may find yourself excluded, and are you going to be able to handle that? (ignore all the idiots calling you a wussie or a girly man, because they are the real idiots)

My answer is, Try to find people you know in your culture who have done what you want to do, and learn from them what you will be up against if you go against the wishes of your parents and other family members.

I reckon it's vitally important for you to know what you will have to face and be absolutely sure you are prepared to do whatever it takes to stay together. If you love each other enough, you can make it work, even though the odds may be heavily stacked against you.

Answer 2

Most important question; Are you a virgin? If not then she is getting defected goods too. You will make a perfect pair. Are you a man or a mouse? So she is poor, are you rich? Or are your parent's and you are afraid of being cut off. That's what it sounds like. If you are a man, then take the woman you love and be happy. Work for what you want and make your own path in life. You will be happier. If you are a mouse, then worry about what other think and do as your told. Go to your room and hide.

Answer 3

If you truly love this girl then dont let her go. Love is the greatest gift. Mommy and Daddy cant give you what you need your whole life. As far as culture...well cultures change every day. Make the first step and change that culture for your future children. Its a terrible thing to not marry someone cuz she is poor or not a virgin. She maybe poor now but down the road she may not and she doesnt need you to make her rich. Her personality and values make her rich. It might be hard at first but in time you will be rewarded.

Answer 4

Are you living in America now? If you are, you are in a new culture. You can marry whom ever you want. As long as you can support yourself, you don't need your parents approval.

It's better to marry some you love and is "defected", than to marry someone who is pure and rich, but that you do not love.

If that's not a good answer, lie and say she's a virgin. I mean, are they going to check. Have her get a job of her own. Than she won't be poor.

Answer 5

Sounds like you need to elope! Its too bad that in some cultures people are so worried about such trivial things.

Tell your parents that it is really unfair to reject her because of some indescretion in her past; after all, she is "almost virgin" Ask them whether they have ever done anything they later regretted.

Tell your parents that she is rich! She has something that costs her nothing, yet is worth more than gold, she will never run out of it, and the more of it she gives away, the richer she becomes! When they ask what it is; tell them its love!

Answer 6

So many people have the problem of not being with the person they want to be with because of parents and religious reasons. You should not judge anyone on their background or their status because that is just plain wrong. If you like her or love her then get your parents to understand, if they can't then that is their problem. If anything they are suppose to be there for you and support you. Give the girl a chance.

Answer 7

If the girl is NOT a virgin then you must be desperate, most guys would rather marry a non-Virgin, otherwise its like ur part of her sexual experiance as the other guy or guys she has had and its like you also are making love to the guy, you get me! if u make love to her you will feel how the previous guy felt , isn't that a turn off? cant you get another girl, simmilar to your cultuer & a virgin, or u belive u r not good looking enough to get a another girl lol, its true that people should stay withing their own cultuer so the roots, identity, pride dont stop, its more chance you will get on with that person, share same intrestes, humour, mentallity etc.

Answer 8

Tony do you truly love this girl, or you are just attracted to her beauty??
If you love her then you know the answer to your own question.
We are all born Virgins you know so give the girl some credit... do you think she is defective? If you do you should not marry her as you do not respect her.
Can you support both of you?? If you can and you truly love her then marry her, if you cannot support both of you and you do not respect her by thinking she is defective then please do not marry her for both of your sakes... oh and about the parents...how old are you???

Answer 9

The only people who have to know she's not a virgin are you and her. Unless there are others who can tell your parents. Aside from that, I understand that you have your cultural issues, but time's have changed. Her being a virgin, or in this case not being one, is irrelevant. It doesn't change who she is.

Answer 10

Will your parents examine her to see if she is a virgin or not, or is she going around telling everyone she is not a virgin anymore!!!! for goodness sake man grow UP!! Is she educated, does she compatible with you mentally? Do you love her??? Those are the questions you should be asking yourself, or else forget about her before you make both of you miserable!