Should I remarry the one who cheated and lied?

Question

My ex-husband cheated countless times. We have been divorced for 3 years and he wants to remarry. I'm not sure if I can trust him ever again, but I've noticed that he's changed and grown up a bit.

Answer 1

GIRL, WHY PUT YOURSELF BACK IN A CIRCLE OF PAIN. After my ex cheated and got 3 women pregnant while we were married for 13 years, I swore I would never give him the chance to do it again to me. I divorce him.

Yes, if he did it several times, he will do it again. Men don't grow or get mature 'out of this habit'. During therapy, I learned that some people cannot stand to be alone, although they cannot stand to be faithful to one person either. So, what they do is marry that good woman that loves them dearly and have her at home, and cheat on the side for the variety they desire and cannot help. Yes, they cannot help it...it is a part of their personality makeup to always get the initial butterflys one gets in meeting someone new. They are also selfish people~~in general. They will work, but don't think you will get all their money to pay the bills. They will never be able to compromise on this.

Please look at what you are getting in ANY relationship, not just what you are giving. We love because of how we feel about ourselves in a relationship, it has little to do with how that person feels about us....THUS THE REASON WE GET STUCK WAITING FOR A CHANGE THAT IS NOT GOING TO COME.

GOOD LUCK.

Answer 2

You have got to be kidding. Are you a gluten for punishment or what? Didn't you learn your lesson the first time around. I suggest you don't make the same mistake twice. It will be worse this time around. Are you that insecure with yourself that you cannot stay single or find someone that will treat you right. He is a loser for cheating and lying and if it has taken him 3 years to change a little then that is too long. He should have done this changing while you were married.

Answer 3

I think the first thing you need to do is to be honest with yourself. The first time he comes home late or is unaccountable for what are you going to think? Is it worth the aggravation? Are you really going to be happy? If you were married or together for a long time, there's always going to be feelings and possibly love still there, BUT is it love or for of being together, having someone and not being alone or is it real love where you can give him your unconditional love. If you can't go back into it unconditionally, then I'd say no way.

Answer 4

NO for one thing are you asking to be treated like crap again.
The other thing is that they have proven that people who get a divorce and then get remarried it has about a 95% failure rate!. The only way he has changed is he know's how to manipulate you better and has probably mastered his skills in
the cheating game so he doesn't get caught.

Answer 5

Has he been to counseling?? How long have you dated again??? I would be leary. What does your heart say? Your gut?? Make sure you date for a while. As tempting as it may be to get back with him, date and take it from there. If you have been dating, I would say it would depend on if he is willing to go to counseling or has been to counseling. Make a decission. Pray to God to see if it is the right one. If it is, you will not have any doubts. If doubts keep coming after you pray then your decission may need to change

Answer 6

You should try couples counseling before getting involved with him again, just to be sure. You don't want to go through the hurt all over again. Be careful. He might have realized his mistakes, or he might be just the same as before. Only time will tell. If you still love him it is worth a try.

Answer 7

i definitely wouldn't make it legal again. i would be really careful... and read up on some other questions in here... they talk about cheating alot. growing up isn't a bowl of cherries... it's just a mere line to what's on the other side. that is your quest to search him out, and where you would like to go. i wouldn't let my feelings show fully... keep them under lock and key until you know what is gonna come out of this. i would think long and hard about the choices you make... it could be the same story all over again.

Answer 8

i would not remarry the man. i doubt that you will ever trust him again (even if he has changed somewhat). the point is that he hurt you deeply. those memories don't go away. the reactions to those memories are deeply engrained in your psyche. do yourself a favor. move on, and be happy..no more drama, too much risk, too little gain.

Answer 9

Been there, seen it, carried out it. She for sure keeps coming back simply by risk-free practices ingredient and as long as you save taking her bull she would manage to maintain dishing it out. I took my ex back thrice as quickly as when I divorced her. i became attempting to do the honorable ingredient simply by little ones in contact and that became a grasp mistake. Get her out of your life detect a woman which will handle you desirable yet be certain you get rid of the emotional luggage from her in the previous you do and pay attention her coming around once you initiate seeing human beings simply by fact her purpose would be to interrupt that relationship by making use of hook or criminal. as quickly as a cheater continually a cheater. i are conscious of it hurts now yet once you take a seat and picture approximately it the harm is from what she did and not from her leaving. you're extra useful off devoid of her. additionally talk on your daughter as she is bothered by making use of all of this to enable her understand your relationship together with her won't replace because of this. Be open and truthful together with her and don't say propose issues approximately her mom in front of her save it on your "i ultimately have been given rid of *****." occasion.

Answer 10

He's lonely and realized he messed up. Over and over and over.
But what do you want to happen? Are you hoping he's changed or do you want him to have changed? Were you happier when you divorced-did you date? Did he come back when you began to move on? If he did, he's scared to be alone and wants what's familiar and safe.