Here's my question...my Fiance is 15 years younger than me (I'm 39) and I really haven't told my dad just yet......How do I tell not only him but the rest of my families? Don't want to freak them out, but their love and support is a great value to me......
2007-06-07 15:43:56 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Age doesn't matter at all. Don't worry about the age difference and just don't mention it to anyone (not even Dad) . It isn't or shouldn't be something they need to know,nor your age either.
Family forget exact ages to some degree and they don't need to know his age. If any one mentions he looks young, simply agree that he does look very young! You will find that age is just a number. It doesn't convey any important information about you or him. Are you young at heart? Is he a mature man? Do you love one another? Do you intend to help one another to suceed in your life's goals? You sound if you feel guilty because he hasn't been alive as long as you. He just wasn't born soon enough, but you found one another regardless of that obstacle. Let your family grow to love him too, before forming preconceived ideas about his mental capabilities. Ditch the guilt, be happy and your family will be happy for you. Introduce him proudly and with love to your dad and the rest of the family.
2007-06-07 16:05:44 · answer #1 · answered by silverlasha 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just a thought have you told this guy that having kids is something that you may not be able to do at your age. Does he want kids?. How do you like dating someone that is young enough to be your son?.
Most guys do want a family and I think it cruel to place this guy in a situation that he may not have that option. I'm not saying that love has an age gap meter I'm just trying to make you see that marrying a guy this young may screw up the rest of his life. You are nearing 40 and he is just starting his adult life would you think it fair if the roles were reversed. I do know that a lot of women later on in life are having kids but even after the age of 35 you increase chances of the baby being born with birth defects and other problems. If you are scared to tell your family maybe that is your conschence telling you that this engagement is wrong!.
I hope you are thinking this through and not just doing this because you have never married and now is your chance.
Good Luck and God Bless I feel that with you asking this question you are unsure if you should go through with this wedding.
2007-06-07 15:56:33 · answer #2 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They'll be happy that you found someone! It's difficult enough to find someone to love, why worry about the age difference?
How do you know they will freak out? They will probably just say the obligatory things that express that they care about you. They'll say:"Are you sure?", but in many variations. You have to give them that much and that's just something that you'll have to patiently bear.
As for the age difference: women have a highre life expectancy than men. So by marrying a younger guy, you'll put yourself into an ideal situation of growing old together.
Congratulations to both of you!!!
2007-06-07 16:33:47 · answer #3 · answered by Nina 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I married a woman that was a few years older than me. The age difference "appeared" to be a bit greater because I look a few years younger than I am and she looked a few years older than she was. As a result, people tended to perceive a larger age difference. My approach was to laugh off questions from people. My other approach was to defend the woman that I loved, and I made it clear that she was the woman that I was going to marry.
Everybody in my family was supportive. Good luck.
2007-06-07 16:23:03 · answer #4 · answered by Randy 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Before you tell them, let them know that even though what you have to say may shock them a bit, they should know that their suporrt means soooo much to you. If they love you (which I'm positive that they do lol), they won't care that he's 15 years younger than you, as long as you're happy.
2007-06-07 15:46:56 · answer #5 · answered by Bre 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they do not approve would you not marry the person.I would hope you still would.There support would be of great value I know.But if this is for real then what really matters is your happiness in life.As long as what ever you do in life is not against what you believe then go for it and be happy.
2007-06-07 15:48:37 · answer #6 · answered by john_brinkl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your dad's input may help a bit, but suppose he says no, it's over. I have been married three years to a wife 30 years younger to myself, so let YOUR heart guide you. Your dad wont be spending his life with him.
2007-06-07 15:49:15 · answer #7 · answered by steak 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOVE<3
is love babe.
if you love him you love him.
of course i do not know your family.
if their strict start with just telling them your seeing someone.
then eeze your way to the most sensible person and
have them slide it through the family.
so they can almost get use of the idea.
it's a long process but if you want your groom
to have a good relationship with your family that's your
best bet.
congrats :D
2007-06-07 15:50:00 · answer #8 · answered by Juni<3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well personally I think age is really not a big factor. Your parents and family should be happy and understand that you found someone who will love you unconditionally.
2007-06-07 15:53:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just introduce him to the family and see how it goes.
Tell them how much he means to you and I'm sure everything will work out
Good luck
2007-06-07 15:47:04 · answer #10 · answered by JJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋