my husband told me he was attracted to me because i was the center of attention, outgoing, and noticed. When we socialize with friends thats me that who I am. I'm loud, fun, outgoing, and beautiful which is what he was initially attracted to, but now he gets mad when I'm the center of attention, or am loud and outgoing. How can something have once attracted him now turn him off?
2007-06-07 08:30:07 · 17 answers · asked by All Smiles 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My wife is also the life of the party, Im proud to be seen with her and we almost always have a great time together. Now the other side, there have been a few times when I became upset with her, that was when she got so involved with evryone else that she seemed to forget that she had come to the party with me. We talked it over, she saw my side, now she is still free to run and have fun but does make it a point to stop by every once in a while and say hi to the hubby. Dont know if this applies to your case or not.
2007-06-07 08:37:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well he might feel that you are getting too much attention and you aren't just the girl he met at the party, you are now his wife. He probably thought that you would tone down some, he may be insecure also because you are the center of attention and everyone notices you, while he might more or less fade into the background. As you all get older maybe your physical appearance isn't changing, maybe his is. It could be any number of reasons. Just talk to him and see what he has to say. All the best.
2007-06-07 08:51:20 · answer #2 · answered by TRUTH HURTZ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I see this time and time again... went through it once myself. What attracts them to us - I too am the loud, fun and life of the party type, is great when they don't "own" us. But when they marry us or make us their gf, they get possessive because they know that what attracted them to us, will attract other guys to us as well (and sometimes women too). Once I went out with my now-husband and no less than 7 people (4 guys and a group of 3 women) tried to hit on me. He laughed it off saying "I'm going to have to tie you down when I go to the bathroom". But I could also tell he was "half" serious. Listen, just try to assure your husband that you married him because you want HIM, that yes, you could have any guy you wanted, but you chose him. I think that always makes my husband feel good and secure. Good luck.
2007-06-07 08:42:57 · answer #3 · answered by Brandy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in your corner until you said you were beautiful--that's a rather shallow statement HOWEVER, here's the deal...... he was ATTRACTED to the "wild pony"... he roped and lassoed the wild pony and now he just wants a mare....he doesn't want any OTHER man to get his "rope around you"....and if HE was attracted to your "wild pony", other men will be as well. So, you either have to become a "mare" at parties and be less extroverted OR, stay away from parties....or risk keeping him angry at you... OR.... sit and discuss this with him in a MATURE manner....he's not going to come right out and TELL you why he doesn't want you being the way you are at parties... NO man expresses their FEELINGS like that...they consider that kind of stuff UNMANLY.... (all that macho crap and all)... but trust me---he just worries that some other guy will be attracted JUST LIKE HE WAS.... so curb it down and make you BOTH happy.
2007-06-07 08:38:23 · answer #4 · answered by LittleBarb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Doesnt turn him off, he wants himself to be the center of your attention. Good luck. He loves you, just might want to tone it down a bit, have fun though
2007-06-07 08:33:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This phenomenon happens in most marriages in one way or another. The person doesn't change, but the way the spouse perceives the personality trait changes.
Before marriage: Life of the party.
After marriage: Attention wh0re.
Before marriage: Intelligent.
After marriage: Intellectual elitist.
Before marriage: Has conviction.
After marriage: Is plain stubborn.
Before marriage: Talkative.
After marriage: Blabbermouth.
Before marriage: Brutally honest.
After marriage: Jerk.
Before marriage: Laid back.
After marriage: Lazy.
Before marriage: Loving.
After marriage: Smothering.
It's a bad trap to fall into, and it will take some long, sober conversations to convince him that he needs to get out of it.
2007-06-07 08:38:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Because those are good traits for a single woman. Now he feels that you should tone it down since you are a married woman?
Just my opinion!
BUT, in my other opinion, he should not try and change you! You are who you are! He should just be happy that at the end of the party you are going home with him!
2007-06-07 08:34:38 · answer #7 · answered by me4tennessee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It probably doesnt turn him off, but he may have become possessive, I mean he doesnt want anyone else to be attracted to u, knowing this attracted him its bound to attract someone else. He doesnt want to lose you or feel he has to fight for you. Me personally i think its a good thing to be wanted it lets me know i got something someone else wants but cant have. He just loves you and hopefully its all of his insecurities and not because he doesnt want to be with you
2007-06-07 08:35:37 · answer #8 · answered by Im da Example 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe insecure.
He was attracted to you for just those reasons. Perhaps he feels that you might attract somebody else for those same reasons.
He feels threatened.
You have to make him feel secure within the relationship. Reassure him that no matter what.. HE is your only focus and you aren't interested in anybody else because HE holds your heart in his and only HE is in YOUR world.
2007-06-08 14:31:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
cuz now its attracting others and its making him feel uncomfortable
i m not judging u and all but ur hubby doesnt feel comfortable wit it
yes u caught his attention with lovely personality but now he wants to be ur center of attention
cant blame him
2007-06-07 08:34:34 · answer #10 · answered by simple J 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋