Brain cells just gone?

Question

Ok theres this guy that has been doing drugs for a very long time.He keeps telling his family that he is going to quit but never does.he does things to hurt the ones that really loves him;Especially his wife I don't think that he's even aware that what he is doing is wrong & hurtfull to his family.What i need to know is how can I help his wife through all of this that is going on.She knows that he loves her dearly but when he does drugs they seem to take over his mind .Should she excuse his behavoir knowing that his brain is fried from the drugs that he has taken?She has tried everything in her power to help him to get some help but he refuses the help.Divorce in not in her plans.She sticks with him for better Or for worse and worse it is.Please help me to help her & her family.Thank you in advance Mrs johnson@n1

Answer 1

Well first of all i think that he has to help himself, but until then his wife should sit with him and the family so that he can see and understand that it is really hurting them , ask GOD for prayer and help on the situation and also she need to let him know that he is lying to himself about it, maybe he will listen and understand but u should tell her to take them out in public when she does it and keep a notebook handy to write down the date he make descions and later constantly refresh his memory about it!

Answer 2

Well, this is kind of a bummer. Seems that the number of fat cells we develop as kids and teenagers determines how many we'll have for the rest of our lives. They found that the number of fat cells -- called adipocytes -- is set during childhood and adolescence for both lean and obese people. They also learned that fat cell turnover is fairly high, with close to 10 percent of them dying and being replaced a year. Scientists already suspected that the overall number of fat cells remains constant throughout adulthood and that that number appears not to be influenced by how much you eat or exercise (when you lose weight, your fat cells shrink but don't go away; when you gain, they fill up with fat and expand). THE NATIONAL FAT QUIZ Question Number One. You are fat because: a. You eat too much b. You don't have the strength of character to push yourself away from the table c. Your unmet emotional needs force you to find solace in comfort foods d. You are a lazy slob who doesn't exercise enough e. None of the above The answer is "e." Think about it. How could it be any of those other things? Obesity is a national plague. What happened? Did suddenly everyone turn into losers? Did everyone all at once develop these characteristics and that is why eight out of ten of us are overweight? No. It's none of these. You −− and most other people, Americans today −− carry too much adipose tissue because the national diet is an unnatural diet. It has nothing to do with you and has everything to do with the "foods" we eat today. Want to make one dietary change that would get rid of your fat forever? Eat nothing that comes in a box. That's it. Instead, make the bulk of your diet fresh vegetables and fruit. Stay away from the middle of the grocery store. Instead buy most of your foods in the produce section and the dairy section. Following that one simple rule will have you living at least 80% of the natural life style that you were meant to live. Following that one simple rule will mean inevitably that the surplus fat on your body will melt away and disappear. Now then, if you have room for not one but two simple suggestions, and you want to speed up fat loss, make sure to add a soy−based protein powder to your diet, something along the line of Natural Life Protein Plus. Including this in your diet boosts the level of growth hormone in your system and this hormone is probably the most powerful fat burner in existence.

Answer 3

The #1 thing she should do is not enable his drug use. She should not excuse his behavior, she should not cover up for him, and she should let him take his lumps. She should place her monetary assets where he can't get to them, and she should place anything she owns of significant value under lock and key if it could be pawned. Love him, yes. But consistently, always, let him reap any and all consequences for his drug use, and do not ever give him money or otherwise help him use drugs. If he falls asleep on the basement floor after a drug binge, she shouldn't even put a blanket on him. If he gets arrested for driving under the influence or for possession, she should allow him to remain in jail and not bail him out. Etc. The name of the game: don't be an enabler!

Answer 4

People with poor self-control rarely get better without losing everyone and everything in the process. Even if they give up "drugs" or "gambling" or whatever symptom of their problem (poor self-control) they have at the time, the lack of self-control is a core character issue, and it usually pops up in some other area of life. In short, if he has this drug problem, he most likely has a host of other associated problems, and they aren't going away because he stops doing drugs. You need to understand that much before you even begin to see the real problems.

Answer 5

She has to know that there is nothing she can do for him. He is an addict and addicts will only get help when they are ready. That could be tomorrow or never. She also cannot continue to enable him in any way. That means never excusing his behavior or bailing him out of jail. It also means she needs to safeguard their money and their home from him. He will always put his drugs first and their finances last. Though I appreciate the fact that she is trying to adhere to her vows, I'm sorry but abuse and addictions are deal breakers for me.

Answer 6

Has she tried Al-Anon? They will help her cope with a person with an addictive personality. They may even be able to help her talk to her husband so that he can get the help he needs.

It's nice to hear she wants to stay with him "through better or worse." Al-Anon will help her to sort out when his actions hurt her so she can make a very logical decision on what to do for herself.

Answer 7

The best way you can help her is just by being here friend and listen to her when she needs someone to talk to. You can change her life situation, because no one is willing to make a change. He will continue to do drugs and she will continue to stand by him. Your wanting to help, seems like a lost cause for this woman and her family, because they don't want to change, you trying to help, will just look like interference.

Answer 8

He's a drug addict and he's behavior is one of a drug addict. The very best thing you can do for your friend is encourage her to go to Alanon and to learn how not to enable him. She can't help him, he doesn't want that. But she can help herself and being with people who understand addictions and are dealing with having addicts in your life.