i have a boyfriend....at first i was very very inlove with him that im willing to take risk just for him...but now...that feeling is gone...but i show to him that i still love him because i dont want to hurt his feelings...should i leave him or should i learn to love him again?
2007-06-06 19:58:54 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
try loving him.. or maybe talk to him about it? talk it through.. at least a shorter pain is much better than a longer pain
2007-06-06 20:01:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes us women,,,and I guess sometimes men, we fall short of being sure of what our hearts want. We get confused and start thinking we're falling out of love, then BAM we wake up the next morning and we're like WHOAH what was I thinking. I used to dump my boyfriend all the time. We've been together for 2 1/2 years and in that time I've bailed on him 3 or 4 times. I was feeling unsure, and sometimes just overall not "feelin'" him. Then I'd dump him....a week or two would pass and I'd be crawling back. Now were doing great! We don't have this problem anymore, I think I was just going through a phase. Anywho! In your case, if it's been a long time that you've been feeling this way, I say dump him. If you have to convince yourself that a bad idea is a GOOD idea....it's a bad idea. And don't make that mistake of hiding the truth of your feelings just because you want to keep his from being hurt.
Let me leave you with this one piece of advice: "People say that the truth hurts. Hell no, it hurts even more if you do a whole bunch of foolishness to try to avoid it".
*Quote courtesy of Tyler Perry aka Madea
2007-06-07 03:07:56 · answer #2 · answered by glittereyedg 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure that you are no longer in love with him? or are you just not feeling the same spark and excitement that you felt during the "honeymoon" stage of dating? Because there is a big difference. If you fall into the second part ("honeymoon"stage is over) then you should talk to him about finding ways to spark things up again, it does not necessarily means that you don't love him anymore its just that you need that excitement that you two had when starting to get to know each other. But if you know that you no longer are in love with him and do not see him as a boyfriend anymore then you should talk to him and break up to him because you will only be hurting him more by pretending to be in love with him. also you are hurting yourself for making yourself stay in a dead end relationship. But in the end it is up to you. your life .. your choice. Good luck! hope that help a little bit.
2007-06-07 03:07:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all write down why you like the boy. If you find that difficult then you might have a problem. You have to realize that people change and part of being in a relationship is keeping up with each other. If you two can't satisfy each others need or you guys are tired of each other then let it go. If you don't want to hurt the guy then you have to. You'll be wasting his time and yours, because in the end you guys are going to be separated. It's not going to be easy, but be true to yourself. Better now then later when you end up marrying him and having three kids. What are you going to do then?
2007-06-07 03:07:43 · answer #4 · answered by Queenz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl, i think if u r having to ask someone else. U must still have some kind of feelings still. you know. so i think that if u really feel like it's over, then just break it to him gently. U guys can always be friends Right? but if u still think u have a little love left for him give love another try. But bottom line no-one can make the decision but u. Good Luck
2007-06-07 03:05:25 · answer #5 · answered by pretty eyes 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You never have to "learn to love" someone that you have fallen out of love with, unless YOU want to make things work and possibly are married.
The reason for dating is to strengthen your heart and excercise your "loving" instincts. This is a good experience because you have learnt to recognise when things have died inside you. Be kind, stay his friend if he so wishes, but do let him know how you feel and that you care for him and do not wish to inflict hurt on him.
I'm sure he will hurt no matter what you do to break things off, but he will hurt more if you lie to him and pretend, because sooner or later you will find someone you DO have feelings for and it will cause a lot more trauma.
Be gentle, be kind, but be truthful.
2007-06-07 03:09:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is a sensation produced by the brain. The brain releases levels of adrenaline dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin, which act similar to amphetamines, stimulating the brain's pleasure center and leading to side-effects such as an increased heart rate, loss of appetite and sleep, and an intense feeling of excitement. This usually occurs in early relationships. However after time, the body calms down. If he is still in love with you at this moment, then leaving him at this moment can be unhealthy for his mental state. In this case, you should wait until he calms down. If not in this case, then I suggest you leave him without devastating him. Let him down easily. This gives him time to adjust to the shock and makes him feel less sad.
2007-06-07 03:07:30 · answer #7 · answered by acesilver1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did not say how old you are or how long the relationship has been going on. Obviously there is a problem with the realtionship. If you do not feel that there is a future for you with this guy, then it is best not to waste your time or his. Move on and find someone that will make you happy and allow him to do the same. It is only fair.
2007-06-07 03:02:38 · answer #8 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't learn to love a person, one thing is make sure that you don't love him, maybe the love isn't gone, and your just use to him,
but if you are pretty sure that you don't love him, then tell him straight out, i don't think are working out between us, and tell him how you feel, because he's going to feel even worse if he finds out that you just been with him, because you feel sorry for him.
2007-06-07 03:02:25 · answer #9 · answered by MILLHOUSE 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey been there, done that, got a t-shirt. my advice, is to do what u think is best. what does ur heart tell u. no one can make up these choice but u. remember this is something u r going to have to deal with the rest of ur life. try talking to him. let him know how u feel, the key to great relationship is honesty. talking we will help u out. if he loves u he will understand.
2007-06-07 03:22:40 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Qer
U r not yet serious for the final fiance isn't it. If so look out for some one more interesting. Why to bluff some one or to lie to yourself. It should be the time for U to pick and see then choose the best one.............best of luck
2007-06-09 13:39:07 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋