I'm always trying to help others in feeling better if they feel down or feel stressed etc. but when I feel like this I can't help but to feel sorry for myself. I try talking to my mom or my friends, but they don't really help me feel better.
It really puts me to shame about myself when I see the majority of people I know in relationships, having babies, getting married, moving, travelling, and pretty much bettering themselves. (don't get me wrong...I admire them for it)
I'm 25 yrs old and I still feel like such a little kid.
I have been single for 2 years now, and I feel like I'm not gonna find a man who will make me happy. My attitude right now is "there's nothing I can offer a man so why should I want a boyfriend, if I can't even be happy with myself"
I'm trying to keep myself busy: listen to music, trying to learn how to play acoustic guitar (and so far, I have learned a tad) and I'm trying to meditate, but I still can't overcome this sadness I feel inside.
2007-06-06 16:40:01 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Thank you all for your kindness. I couldn't pick a best answer because they were all wonderful.
Your comments really brought a smile to my face....thank you all again :-)
2007-06-06 20:50:43 · update #1
First of all, it is good that you try to help others. When it comes to the self, we all have something that we wish to better. Everyone's lives travel at their own pace; you may be on a cycle in which your are improving your self, however, you feel so down and depreciated that you can't see the improvements that you are going through. You stated that you have been single for two years. Is it by personal choice or do not give other people, in this case a male, the chance to see the good in you? Since you feel you're not good enough, you close yourself off from others. Which makes others apprehensive about approaching you. You might be the sweetest, most considerate person, if so, let others see that and embrace that. I' m not saying to be kind to others for your own gain, but be who you are and let everything else will take care of itself. I hope this helps.
2007-06-08 02:51:39 · answer #1 · answered by Victor 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
aw, you have so much ahead of you. Just think of how much you have ahead of you. You sound like and extrmely nice, compassionate person and and man would be lucky to have you. for some people it just takes a little longer to find the right one. I noticed all the things that you are doing to keep yourself busy are by yourself. Go out with some friends- join a book club- or take a guitar class.
However it is true that before you make a man happy you have to make yourself happy. consider speaking to a docter about taking anti- depressants. I know it can be frusterating but one day you will have a husband and an beautiful family. I would worry about work now to help better yourself and the rest will just come to you.
The world needs more people like you.
smile =]
2007-06-06 23:48:42 · answer #2 · answered by yo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry so much about it. It'll stress you out. Sometimes the harder you look, the more difficult it seems to find the right person. Sometimes they come into your life out of the blue. I met my last two girlfriends by chance and although things didn't work out for whatever reason, I haven't lost hope. Just be yourself and continue being the good person you are. You'll attract the right guy sometime soon and he'll be in your life before you even realize that you didn't have to try that hard. Don't think you have nothing to offer, I would love to have a girlfriend that cared for people as you do. Chin up, embrace the world...your life is only beginning.
2007-06-06 23:56:14 · answer #3 · answered by ro 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's always easier to comfort someone else when they are going through a stressful time than it is to deal with it ourselves. It's alright to feel sorry for yourself for a day or so but that's it. Focus on your self, improving your self esteem & self respect. If you feel like you have nothing to offer anyone, that feeling radiates from you so you have to change that feeling. Think about your good qualities as a person. You do have a lot to offer someone & when you start to believe in yourself again, someone will come into your life. This was a hard lesson for me to learn as a guy. It's true though. Change your attitude about yourself & everything else will change too.
2007-06-07 00:53:35 · answer #4 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's time to stop worrying about other people and start thinking about YOU! It's great that you are trying to play guitar. Keep setting goals for yourself! Try to accomplish any dreams you may have. Once you start finding things you like and enjoy and you do well, you'll gain more confidence in yourself. For me, I always wanted to go to college but couldn't due to health reasons. I became very depressed. I decided being happy for one more day was more important than knowing how many more days I'd have. So I enrolled in school. I learned that I can do anything I put my mind to and guess what, it improved my health dramatically! So if it's the guitar you want to learn, learn it and master it! And don't stop there, you can do what ever you dream of and do it well!
2007-06-06 23:51:51 · answer #5 · answered by PhantomRN 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
First you are not a robot, everyone has ups and downs.
Second, your brain has the right idea but your hearts not in it.
You don't need a mate to be happy or whole, but of course love is what we all desperately crave.
Yet the fact that you are focusing on your inner journey is a good sign that your brain is winning the battle.
Give it a little more time. You might meet the love of your life tomorrow or next year, just make sure you're ready.
2007-06-06 23:51:30 · answer #6 · answered by Soundjata 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The "sadness" is feeling "hopeless" otherwise called "depressed." Alot of people are just like you and love to make others laugh, enjoy life yet when alone crawl into a corner. First thing to remember IS, that you are not "hopeless" and you need to get "out" of too much thought in "yourself." I know you said that you try to keep busy, play music, or listening to it, even mediatation. I, myself, don't ALLOW myself to get in this "corner." I do much of what you do and have played quitar for the last 44 years, listen to music, and get wrapped up in my work but when I feel like the world is closing in I seek out COMEDY on TV or Tapes of the 3 stooges to get me OUT from within MYSELF. Sounds stupid, I know, but I found out years ago that LIFE has many complex situations in it and many times some of those complexities throw us off balance to where it seems everything is all wrong and nothing seems to be going right. So I throw all of it a CURVE, "by" wrapping myself up in the STUPIDITY of MAKING myself LAUGH and get out of these inferior feelings and emotiions which come on from time to time. Try it sometime, you may find out, as I have that I don't have TIME to be DEPRESSED or wrapped up in inferior THOUGHT....
2007-06-07 00:06:21 · answer #7 · answered by Theban 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all you can't cheer yourself up because nobody ever takes or listens to their own advice..LOL but true! Everybody has something to offer, it's not for you to decide. Give a man a chance and he will see something in you that you have to offer. Don't be so hard on yourself.
2007-06-06 23:49:58 · answer #8 · answered by confused 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well... maybe its coz ur spending more time thinking about other people. You should take some time and rest and think more about your self...then when your happy you can make other people happy again... try and fill in the hole of sadness in you. play, Have fun.
2007-06-06 23:49:23 · answer #9 · answered by always_askin 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Imagine yourself at a grand feast, where everyone has hands at the end of arms which are much too long to feed oneself with. The solution? Everyone feeds each their neighbor.
2007-06-06 23:46:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋