There is this man that I have known for years on a professional level. We have always gotten along as friends and coworkers. Shortly before I left the company weeks ago, he started to show interest in me and became flirtatious. I did not return the favor in part b/c I was shocked and b/c I knew I would be leaving. Although I really admire and think alot of him. He stepped his game up at first, but since I didn't, he began to slack off and our relationship returned to a professional one.Now that I have gone, I can not stop thinking of him. He may have someone else. That is unknown to me. My question here is not to ask him out or hope that he is single, but how do I go back now, and let him know I am interested after I kind of shot him down gently? I will end up having to go to the workplace, so I'll only have one shot at this. I do not want to look desperate nor do I want him to think he must drop what he has for me now. I just want him to know. it's nagging me.
2007-06-06 16:14:01 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't have time to let him "chase" me or subtly flirt. He has to get the message b/c I can't keep coming up for excuses to go to his job. Thanks for any serious suggestions.
2007-06-06 16:14:09 · update #1
Well,
First of all, check it out, if he is still single then you make your move, otherwise another woman (his wife or gf) will be crying. You won't want to hurt your same gender ya. For this you can alway ask your former coworkers who know him well. If all is clear, you can alway ask him out for a chat and from there, not in a capacity of coworker or professionalism, you can better judge him.
We must understand some people do give us an impression of good that we seem to cherish it after it was gone, no harm getting back and find out what you are cherishing is really true. At least it clear and ease your mind once and for all.
In today enivronment, a girl asking for a boy out is so common, unless you are kind of conservatives type, then I have no said. But what for ponder and missing someone alone, he is reachable, so get on the line and make your move, who knows, you and him may become good lover ya.
Best wishes.
2007-06-06 16:45:46 · answer #1 · answered by butterfly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go up there early during the day around 10:30. Be dressed very nice yet comfortable since you are going to be a little nervous anyway. Make small talk with everyone but show him that you are really focus on speaking with him. I would ask him if he "has a second" & then continue with the conversation on asking how he has been or how the workplace must be different & lonely without you around! (humor works great & a ice breaker) Let the man know that you have been thinking about him & ask him what his lunch plans are & maybe you two can meet around noon for a quick bite to eat & small talk. You don't work in that workplace anymore so take the risk! Guys do it all the time & if it makes it any easier..This is how I got my man at our workplace & he's now my husband & father of our 2year old! I only had an "idea" that he was interested & I took the chance. So go ahead & risk it..What do you have to lose? I will keep my fingers crossed for you so get up there!
2007-06-06 16:35:28 · answer #2 · answered by BG 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should give him a call at work or maybe you can e-mail him, talk to him & ask him out to lunch or dinner & if it goes well, then make more plans for the following week to do whatever (i.e. movies, park, etc). The key here is to keep in touch with him. Start off easy by spending some time with him & let things fall into place. You shouldn't beat around the bush. If you have feelings for him, LET HIM KNOW. Don't assume he's got someone when you don't really know the truth. You are a grown woman & this is NOT High School. If you see something potential with this man, don't pass up the opportunity.
GOOD LUCK!
2007-06-06 16:25:40 · answer #3 · answered by sugarBear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you worked together, did you have his email? If so drop him a line. Find out if he is interested in dating. If you don't have his email come by work when he is getting off and run into him. You should try to find out if he is married and back off completely if he is. If you are friends with some of your old co workers who know him. Ask questions. Find out where he likes to hang out and show up. He can't find you, if you aren't around.
2007-06-06 16:28:12 · answer #4 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wear a skirt, heels and stockings.. go up there and quitely communicate this to him..Maybe a note, something along the lines of... I have been attracted to you for a while but was afraid of interoffice rumors.. Now that I am not working there I still think of your body, your smile, and your lips... lets go out and before the night is over I will rock your world.
2007-06-06 16:22:15 · answer #5 · answered by Money Shot 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Send him a friendly email... Try to establish a personal friendship with him and see where it goes from there.. See how "into you" he really is... Over time it will become obvious what he thinks of you and you of him.. Taking it slow is the key, though, to building something solid...
2007-06-06 16:20:30 · answer #6 · answered by Simian J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's over madame,sadly is like that.Your opportunity is over;you had it and you didn't want it.If one day,you have another chance to meet him,that is another story.For the moment,don't do nothing and stay away from him and working at "your professional level".No phone calls,no emails,no visits.
2007-06-06 16:30:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How many more times are you going to post this?
2007-06-06 16:24:13 · answer #8 · answered by LilyBelle 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
"I have tickets to ......... would you like to join me?"
Dating someone in the workplace... bad idea
Dating someone out of the workplace...good idea
2007-06-06 16:18:31 · answer #9 · answered by lily 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, unless you lost your old work number, give him a call...invite to lunch...and take it from there...
2007-06-06 16:19:37 · answer #10 · answered by john 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋