Men or Ladies, what do you find is the hardest about being a single parent nowadays ?...If you?

Question

need to vent, please feel free to do so.
I promise I will read all the answers completely.

Your answer just might save someone else some heartache or give them some tips.

This question is very hard to pick a Best Answer on.
All the answers are very deeply felt.
Sometimes a serious question doesn't get enough exposure.
Probably need a Celeberity to ask this.
I have chosen my Best Answer only to be fair to all of you.

Answer 1

I was just having this conversation with a close friend of mine. The absolute hardest thing is knowing that I am going about it alone. When I had someone, it was very much a comfort in just knowing there was someone to help carry the weight with me. No matter what happened in my life, I had someone who was willing to stand and take some of the punches with me.

Now, going about it alone, there are times I feel just that - alone. My son has been going through a difficult period. No matter how much I try to lean on someone it just wouldn't be enough because there isn't anyone here at night touching my hair and saying to my face that everything is going to be okay.

I do what I have to do and I make it just fine. I enjoy sometimes not having to walk on eggshells around someone else when trying to do right by my son (as in a past relationship). I also enjoy being the only one he feels he can turn to when things get hard for him.

On the same note, I sometimes hate that I'm the only one he can turn to when things get hard for him because I don't understand. I'm a woman. Although I try, I cannot replace the male figure he needs in his life.

Now, does this mean that I'm going to jump up and 'grab a man' in order to make it better? Oh hell no.. I'll keep doing what I have to do and I'm very certain that the rewards will be in the result of raising a decent man.

**edit** Another answerer mentioned having a father that isn't helping. That was probably the best thing I ever did for my son was not involve his father. Before you jump down my throat - his father was a one week fling and already had a 13 yr old child. I let him know my son was born but he said he would call me back and didn't. I had a choice right then whether I wanted to go after him for child support and force him to play daddy to a child he didn't want who's mother was someone he wasn't in love with.. or.. I could leave it and let my son make the decision later in his life when he chose. I chose the latter. It makes it harder but at least he doesn't have a part time/no time father.

Answer 2

Being a single father living in a state that favors the mother is the hardest part for me. I have no recourse to get my kids other then to prove she is a negligent parent. So I am stuck paying big money that I don't make enough of for my kids to live with her most of the time because fathers don't have as many rights here. She also has not tried to get educated to get a better job which makes it harder on me. I know the laws were made to make deadbeats pay for kids they didn't want to support, but it screws the guys that are there for their kids, and the state legislature is to weak to do anything about it because they don't want to lose votes from women.

Answer 3

I'm a single mom and raising two boys was not fun but I enjoy seeing them grow. Sometimes I feel sad that I could not give them everything they want but on the other hand it's good because they grew up understanding the difference of having just enough. There are grown up now and become a good person, never been in trouble.

Answer 4

Finances, never having time to do everything or having alone time to regroup or relax, being the only one to discipline and always feeling like the bad guy, missing adult companionship. But, I wouldn't trade it for anything else in the world. I love being a parent and the single part of it shows me my strength, independence and motivation to be the best example for my child and to ensure she has everything she needs to live a happy and healthy life.

Answer 5

As a widowed parent, the hardest thing for me to deal with is all the "parent specific" activities. My son badly wants to be in boy scouts, but many of their activities are centered around father/son time.
In addition, people judge me for needing a night during the week for "ME" time. I spend every day, morning, noon and night with my son. I can't just leave him home with daddy to run to the grocery, or visit a friend, I don't get a break. I need ONE night for myself. This does not make me a bad one. It makes me a SANE mom.
I'd like to add 2 things.
1. I LOVE being a mom!!! My son is wonderful
2. I LOVE SHAZ :)

Answer 6

Well, I'm feeling a bit inadequate lately. I don't know how to fix certain problems my daughter is having and I miss the sound judgement and patience my husband had in times like these.

Answer 7

well being that i have been one most of my life i would say the financial part but i guess the hardest part is when the other parent chooses not to help out emotionally and be there for their child, so you end up feeling like your trying to fill both shoes

Answer 8

Well driving the kids to school and having a job at the same time. Its really demanding but very rewarding

Answer 9

I'm sorry this isn't a proper answer to your question, but i have to seriously commend all the single parents out there, because even with 2, it gets hard!!

you single parents amaze me.

Answer 10

Yeah, same as the guy above me, and, having the final say in what your kid does, no one to confer with, then when anything goes wrong, it's all on you.
and the lack of sleep.