lately my friends don't want to hang out with me, it seems my boyfriend doesn't love me the way he used to (its been eight months together). My friends don't like him, they don't even know him but all they care about is that i'm not spending as much time together (in my opinion -- very self centered). I don't know if i still believe the values of my religion any more. I just got grounded from going to my boyfriend's house because of some of the things we do there (found out my mom saves my msn conversations). I'm grounded off msn for the time being. This summer all i'm doing is babysitting two kids with possibly no connection to the outer world. I just don't know where to go from here. Please ... any advice? It just seems like everything is going wrong. What would happen if i ran away?
2007-06-04 15:44:24 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Roadtrip!!
2007-06-04 15:46:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Boy you really are bummed out on yourself!! Hold your head up!!!! Sometimes it seems like everything is wrong with everything, but it can't be everybody and everything else in the world it's not possible! It has to be ourselves. You are just bummed out and if you just hold tight and wait everything will blow over. Besides if you ran away, you'd most likely be very hungry and have to sleep under a bridge on the cold ground in the rain with a bunch of other homeless people. Maybe have to turn to , I don't even want to say the word Prostitution, but that's what happens when you are at the end of a rope, you become desperate and will do anything cause you think you have too. And here you have this life with just a little dent in it right now that you won't even notice in a few days. Just go and have yourself a good cry and empty yourself of all your worries. You'll feel better, it almost like a good wash job on our soul. No hold your head up and look around again. It's not that bad, you have a family that loves you or your mom wouldn't even bother worrying what you do (think about that) you'd do the same if it were you own daughter. As for as your boyfriend, you are young you r relationships will have many ups and downs I MEAN MANY!!!!, as for friends you 'll probably meet hundreds of potential friends in your life, if they move on then you have to to. But I'll bet it will all be OK next week maybe even tomorrow!!!! You still have your religion that's why your conscious is bothering you! Or you simply wouldn't be worried about it!!!! Just have a little talk with the man upstairs he is still there watching you, your just confused at the moment.
2007-06-04 22:47:32 · answer #2 · answered by char__c is a good cooker 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you've hit a growth opporunity. When things like this happen to me, what I usually do is look back at how I've been doing things and look forward to see where I want to go. Then I look at what I'm doing currently.
When things go wrong it's a sign that it's time for a change. What's going wrong, what direction is it pointing you in and what do you need to do to find happiness again? Are your friends self-centered or are they able to see that your boyfriend's influence is hurting you? Does your boyfriend not love you the way he used to because you're giving him too much of what he wants? Is he getting his jollies then moving on? Is that what your Mom found on msn?
Take some time to really think things through. Are you being used by your boyfriend? Have you changed that much? Have your friends changed? Maybe babysitting for the summer won't be such a bad thing. Maybe you can use that time to work on deciding exactly how you want your life to be and getting your priorities sorted out. You can do this without anyone else's influence since you'll apparently be cut off from the outside world. Then when you emerge at the end of the summer you'll be the person you want to be.
What would happen if you ran away is that you'd starve and be living on the streets. You may end up being a prostitute in order to make enough money to feed yourself. You'd be scared s***less and you'd wish you were at home with your snooping Mom who obviously loves you enough to make some hard choices on your behalf. Stay home, think things through and take the opportunity you're being presented with to move forward to a life that you will be able to enjoy. Life isn't all that bad. What you do with it is up to you.
2007-06-04 23:33:57 · answer #3 · answered by innerradiancecoaching 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok so heres what you need to do.. Take a deep breath and step back from everything. Try to deal with one problem at a time. If you tackle all of them they will win and all of these "little" problems your having will seem so bad you will want to do something drastic and crazy like.. umm RUN AWAY! Ok im not your parent nor anyones for that matter so lets break it all down.
1. Your friends probably dont hang out cuz they dont like your b/f as you said. Find out why, maybe its something simple that can be fixed, or maybe they see something that you dont.
2. Religion, talk to someone that is involved in your religion, let them know your doubts, your concerns, the only way to stay rooted in your beliefs is to be around people who believe the same things.. so maybe look at who your hanging with as a possible problem with that.
3 Your grounded for doing naughty things with the b/f. Well i say good to your parents for caring about you, bad that they are spying on you. hmm tough call but im going to have to believe that if all you got was grounded then you got off light, it may seem like forever, but its not the end of the world, take it in perspective. And DONT become a teenage mother.
4. Babysitting is a connection to the outside world, right now your just feeling overwhelmed. Do not make a mistake like running away. It will only make your problems worse than before.
Goodluck and remember always put things in perspective and always take time to take a deep breath and look at the whole picture
2007-06-04 22:55:00 · answer #4 · answered by Its Just Me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First thing I need to tell you is to not run away from home! Unless you have decent job and you have finished school or if your over 18 yrs old. Now your mom is probably just trying to protect you over the things you have been doing over at your boyfriends house, plus you gave her a reason to save your msn msgs. and your friends, you can always find new ones. right now i dont think you are missing too much out there. Just hang in there the world is not ending out here. After a week of being a good girl you should ask your mom if you can go out again and maybe you have earned her trust by then. good luck
2007-06-04 22:52:34 · answer #5 · answered by ~OLI~ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your world is spinning out of control.
This is normal at this time at your life- but I am sure that this declaration does little for you.
Ever hear of a mid-life crisis?
This is when an adult has to come to terms with the changes in their life, and sometime they adjust in strange ways.
(buys a sports car, cheats on spouse, quits job, etc)
Change happens throughout your life.
The 2 biggest changes are when you are on the door step to adult hood, and this "mid-life crisis"
People make a huge deal about the midlife change and often forget about the changes into adulthood.
You are making a transition from a child to an adult, and your role in the world is very very different.
You are starting to understand things that are making life spin out of control.
You may have found out that:
1.) You are very capable of things, but no one will believe you, and are still treating you like you know nothing.
2.) The way the world is- the way the media (Movies, commercials), school and parents say it is- it is NOT how it is.
3.) Things that were "Certain" are not as certain anymore. People you thought knew everything are making obvious mistakes, and you find they are human after all- just like you.
You are in a place where your values are transitioning away from where your family and friends expect you to have them.
(Your friends sound more immature and have not learned that one must "spend" one's self in order to make intimate relationships work.)
You already know what would happen if you ran away. I know you are not seriously considering this, but this statement from you is one more of frustration then anything else.
There are a lot of ways to "Find" your self.
There are temperament tests
http://www.keirsey.com/
Read philosophy
2007-06-04 23:08:09 · answer #6 · answered by There you are∫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U dont need to runaway!!! Please dont, that is like the most temporary relief and it just ends in more depression and problems, I have tried it. Its just really immature! You sound like you are in high school, your whole world centers around friends and thats about it. Which is totaly normal because theres not much else to do, you live with your parents and their rules, you might have a dumb job, might have a car, etc. But you dont have a lot of options so the only sense of freedom you get is with your friends. And when you either dont feel like you have any close ones or feel betrayed by them, it can be very depressing. But you have to be logical about your situation! First of all, it will pass. This feeling you have wont last forever and life can and will get better! After adjusting to that mindset, you have to focus on other things, like yourself lol And i am serious! Make some serious goals for yourself and with your free time in the summer its perfect! For example, get into shape so when school starts up again you can look extra hot and of course you will have better health! Get really tan...read tons of books on subjects you love! Study something that interest you! Take this opportunity to help youself! Also you should work on reestablishing your relationship with your family, they are your foundations! But bottom line, its not the end of the world even if it seems like it, and that is just typical of high school life and you must recognize that there is so much that you have ahead of you and dont let this temporary low bring you down!
2007-06-04 22:59:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's a scary world out there, things WILL get better, because with every 'down' theres an 'up'. It is hard to live at home when you feel like an adult-but remember, that won't last forever either. Save the money you make babysitting!
Maybe your friends would come back if you didn't have the boyfriend. Good Luck!
2007-06-04 22:52:36 · answer #8 · answered by island 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Life is a little bit difficult at times. Running away seems tempting... of course it does, if you're focusing on running, you're not thinking about the problems you're trying to get away from. But, unfortunately, they eventually catch up (they're just as fast as we are :)). I promise you it gets better, and if you hold strong now, you'll see that you'll be better prepared for the next set of problems that life sends your way (which you'll be able to handle once they come, too). If your friends are truly your friends, you should feel comfortable sitting them down and working through things. Remember, one day at a time and deep breaths. Find a hobby you enjoy so that when life gets a little tough, you know you always have that to fall back on and that there's always something that makes you happy.
2007-06-04 22:55:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
well first of all dear you don't want to run away!!
you have your whole life ahead of you and you may not feel like things are going the way you planned or even had hoped for ,but your mom IS looking out for your well being ,if she didn't care she would allow you to do what you want!
as far as your fellower r I'm not sure if things are going sour or not? you need to talk to him and see.
Your friends may seem jealous and self centered to you now ,however they miss their Friend and perhaps they see you loosing YOU and who you are in this relationship!
A healthy realtionship for all areas is not giving up one person for the other!
By all means DONT Give up GOD !!!!
He IS and Will be your very best friend always!!
Get back to church and the things of God!
2007-06-04 22:54:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you ran away, I'm sure your parents would call the police and they'd be out looking for you. So scratch that off your list. Secondly, sit back and take a deep breath. It's not really that bad is it? Just got to take things the way they are going to be. Talk to your friends and have them air out what they want to say. Repeat that process with your parents and everything else will work its way out.
2007-06-04 23:29:30 · answer #11 · answered by Double L Loser 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋