Old friend who wants to reconcile may have alterior motives.?

Question

My best friend from college recently called me out of the blue. After we graduated he just basically started blowing me off. I saw him last 16 years ago. He moved out of state and we lost touch. I tried finding him off and on through the years but to no avail. He recently found me very easily which made me wonder why he waited so long to make contact.

I learned in his initial phone call that he is currently unemployed and is going to be in my area visiting his brother. I figured out from his email address that he is involved in a pyramid scheme and I believe that he is going to try to recruit me. I believe that the only reason he contacted me is for this purpose.

I'm supposed to meet up with him tonight but don't want to. I'm uninterested in his "opportunity" and don't want to drive 40 miles to hear a sales pitch. I'm peeved that he contacted me under the guise of friendship to make money from me.

If you were in my place, how would you get out of it? Or would you go?

Answer 1

Dont drive 40 miles to see him, meet at a mutual place, and if he offers you an "opporunity", just change the subject. If you still upset with him, I think you should be honest, and ask him why he didnt contact you (but dont come off as really rude). I've been there, in my situation, I just stopped communicating with my friend I always had to revolve her but nvr made time for me until she had something nice to share in her life. It was very annoying how self-involved my friend was. Anyway, best of luck, if it doesnt work out, you have nothing to lose cuz its already been 16 yrs.

Answer 2

It sounds like you are not really vested in this friendship; you sound bitter that he blew you off after college and didn't try to contact you sooner than he did. So there is resentment already brewing on your part, which is natural. If you go and he pitches you, you will feel hurt and burned again. I say give him a call and tell him you can't make it, don't lie by giving a lame excuse, you just can't make it. Tell him you understand that he is working this scheme and if that's what he wants to talk about you're not interested. Tell him you would, however, like to meet to rehash old times and renew your friendship, if he is interested. Be honest and upfront with him. You have nothing to lose. Good luck!

Answer 3

I probably wouldn't go. I agree that if you do, you'll probably be sitting through a sales pitch. Funny that he contacts you now ya know? Just tell him that something came up and if he's interested, stay in touch via email or phone calls and see if he sticks around to pursue the friendship.

Answer 4

I know what you mean. I think in your place I would blow him off and in a very simple way: not showing up but without a previous call to let him know I won't be there. If you just blow him off without a call he will get the message and he will know he can't use you and he won't call again. If you call him to give him a excuse he will try to schedule so the best thing is not showing up and not calling. It is rude but he deserves this for trying to use you.

Answer 5

Make him come to you. Don't drive for him. He blew you off, blow him off. And tell him the truth. It is good to see you after so long. I just wish it were on different terms, and you are not interested in whatever he is there to sell, unless that is really what you are looking for.

Answer 6

I'd go, let him start the pitch, and then be upfront.
"You know, I was really excited to catch up with you, and find out how you were doing. This thing sounds like Amway, and I am definitely not interested. It was great to see you, hope your family's doing ok, y'all take care!"
You'll be the bigger person.

Answer 7

He has alliterative motives, your right not to go meet with him, avoid him, tell him something came up, if your gut tells ya to stay clear do it. good luck.