We are in a role reversal marriage. My husband stays home and takes care of the house and I work full-time. Lately, I almost find myself making excuses for why he is home. Is there any reason why I should be embarrassed that he is a full-time homemaker? I say this because a lot of people will automatically say, "Oh, when he is going to get a job". Any advice?
2007-06-04 07:37:00 · 40 answers · asked by Claudia 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My fiance is the same as your husband.. I can afford for him to stay home (I work at home anyhow) and he cooks, cleans, takes care of our puppy, cars, and anything else we need or want to do.. I don't see anything wrong with it.. I know how you feel though.. In the beginning, I would make excuses for why he was at home too, but now I don't care.. If people have something negative to say, it's just because they are jealous that they can't afford to do the same!!!!!!! Don't feel bad or ashamed of your husband!! There is obviously something that he does good that makes it work for you guys if he is staying at home and you are both happy with your situation!! Screw everyone else and enjoy having your man at home!! I love having him home all the time, it's great!! But he also knows he is free to get a job whenever he'd like!!
2007-06-04 07:43:00 · answer #1 · answered by idgaf 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Make excuses? be embarrassed? Are you crazy! Thank your husband, thank god and enjoy it!!!
As a stay at home mom people ask me the same question "Do you work?" "When are you going back to work?" I ask what their definition of "work" is. If it is earning a paycheck, then no I do not work. I do however have the most important job there is, taking care of my home and my family, it is a 24 hour a day job and although I do not recieve monetary compensation, it is the most gratifying job I have ever had. It is also the toughest job I have ever had. The mental, emotional, and physical demands are grueling and often times seem impossible.
Should you be embarassed? NO WAY!!! You should be proud and thankful and thrilled that you have a husband who is willing to take on the role. Not many men I know can handle it, I know my husband couldn't. The repetetiveness, the lack of adult interaction and converstation, the lack of quiet. Sometimes you feel like you are going to loose your mind and when you catch yourself humming Barney tunes at the grocery store you know that you have! It is not easy by any stretch of the imagination.
It takes two to run a family and a home, one goes out into the world and makes the money and one stays home to run things there, both roles are equally important. Anyone who thinks that it matters which person does which is just plain ignorant and needs no response, those days are long gone. My husband says "I make the living, and my wife makes the living worthwhile"! (actually I think he stole that from Dr. Phil but I'll take it!) So you make the living and your husband makes the living worthwhile! It works either way!
Give your husband a big hug and kiss and say to those who ask, "Aren't I lucky to have a such a wonderful husband!!"
Good Luck!! and God Bless!
2007-06-04 08:09:30 · answer #2 · answered by Mamalissa 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No excuses for being a house husband, however, I am fairly young and now retired do to some medical conditions . My income is the same as when I was working, actually lucky it worked out to be lateral pay for the rest of my life. Even though I still bring home the bacon so to speak it expected that I will fill my day with household chores and be as active as I ever was. I do have some involvement with some volunteer work with my local theather group as well as other city functions. Although I keep myself busy it never seems to be enough. My wife on the other hand stays busy working, traveling, daily exercise and swimming, shopping and so forth. Evening we are some what astranged , our communication has got worst. We have always lived independently of each other. But now that I am at home I have more time at hands. It would be nice to have her slow down and spent more time together. Theres more to our lives then I have space to write about but we love and respect each other. But life has changed quite a bit it feels as if we re growing apart as a posed to together. Onward and forward .
2015-06-08 04:39:42 · answer #3 · answered by Mike 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So much for women's lib if people are worried about reversed roles. Didn't most women stay home in the old days and take care of the house. We have come a long way since then, so why is it a problem for a man to assume this role?
2007-06-04 07:43:30 · answer #4 · answered by ANTHONY M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As long as you are comfortable with him staying at home then I wouldn't worry... However it is typical for people to frown on men being the homemaker because most all of us grew up with our father having the job and the wife staying home to rear children and do housework.. If you are making excuses for him then you feel like there is something wrong with the situation... If there are no children involved and he is not handicap then there is no reason for him to stay at home.... Two incomes are always better than one honey.
2007-06-04 07:44:23 · answer #5 · answered by HelloPeeps 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I cared, I would tell those that ask when he is going to get a job that he has a job; taking care of his children, his home, and his wife. If it makes you feel better, further explain that you and he came to the decision that children fare better at home with a loving parent than they do in sterile child care facilities...and he was the obvious choice to stay home, since he likes to...and you don't .
Or, you could always do the Dorothy Parker thing, look them in the eye, and reply: "why would you ask such a personal question?"
2007-06-04 07:45:03 · answer #6 · answered by belle_la_donna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not. There is no need to make excuses. If you and he decided that that is what works best for you, then who cares what anyone else thinks. If anyone else makes the "Oh, when is he going to get a job," comment, you tell them that it is 2007, and they wouldn't bat an eyelash if the situation were reversed and you were the one at home caring for the children, so why should they have issue with a man doing it. You and your husband have my deepest respect and congratulations for being strong enough to go against the norm and do what works best for you.
2007-06-04 07:43:19 · answer #7 · answered by elizatash 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No reason why you should feel embarassed, when people ask if he is going to get a job tell them he HAS one, taking care of your home. Or tell them that your marriage works with the roles reversed. I know a number of couples who have reveresed their roles.
2007-06-04 07:54:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be proud, for all those stay at home moms or dads we all know how hard it is to take care of the child. Don't be embarrassed, they don't know what they are talking about. Being a real dad also takes alot of guts and says alot of him. He is a great husband and dad. He wants to be home with the kid/s and that is a great thing and nothing to be ashamed of..
2007-06-04 07:50:31 · answer #9 · answered by Jamezy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not be embarrassed by your husband staying home and taking care of business at the home while you are at work. If you have a PC at home, and if he feels it would be lucrative, he can work from home and make money from the PC, even start a good home-based business. Don't let society dictate to you what your husband should be doing.
2007-06-04 07:50:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋