Just because your not married to the mother anymore, you still have kids, and they deserve the same life they would have had , if their parents hadn't divorced. Why should they suffer, while their parent goes off, and has a great life?
And kids very rarely move out at 18, so the mother is still financially helping, and supporting the kids, while the father is free of any responsibility! The kids just don't move out on their 18th birthday! They still need support, untill the get on their feet! They don't just get kicked out on their 18th birthday! And of course the child it WORKING at 18, but not making enough to pay for college, a apartment, food, and all other expenses!
So answer both questions!
Why do fathers hate paying Child support?
Why are the fathers free not to pay when the child turns 18, when the mother is still supporting the kids?
2007-06-04 05:24:35 · 9 answers · asked by Sunday 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Some good points, snack daddy10!
2007-06-04 06:00:33 · update #1
Adelaidi, I'm glad for you you didn't need the child support! Unfortunetly, not all parents can support the children on one income! Some parents stayed home to take care of the kids, so they might not be able to go out and get a good paying job, and not need child support!
2007-06-04 06:30:23 · update #2
Adelaidi, That's lucky for you, you remarried, and buy secondhand clothes! But not everybody get's remarried, and has a new husband to support their kids! I raised my kids for 12 years, alone! And you say, "what about the fathers, feel sorry for them" well I say "What about the kids! Feel sorry for them!" There's all different kinds of situations, and not everyone of them is as great as yours! Alot of single parents and children are struggling out there, and it's both the parents responsibility to take care of the kids, no matter who they live with, or spend more time with!
2007-06-04 06:49:19 · update #3
Not every women is as altruistic as you have written.
I have over heard a friend of my wife talk about shopping sprees and trips she has planned when the "child support" check comes. This mother was NOT spending the money on her child, but rather on herself and then would turn around and complain that she wasn't getting enough. Further more this women drained her own child's college fund by buying herself a car and re-decorating.
I don't believe that ALL men would have any issue providing money for their child, but when the mother mismanages it that is where the problems come into play. If you hand over money to be spent on the child and see no improvement in the child's living situation, but yet the mother is going on a personal vacation to Cancun. I believe that their needs to be a better system in place to show accountability for the money that is set aside for the child maybe a separate acct to which both parents can audit it if they think the money is not being used correctly.
FYI, I also have friends who when they turned eighteen their mother's kicked them out. Some manage to still educate themselves and others are just making do.
2007-06-04 05:58:32 · answer #1 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think most of the father's that don't pay do it for really selfish reasons. They have it in their head that the mother will use the money for herself and not the kids. Some also feel because they no longer live there, it is no longer their problem. I know from my own experience as a child, my great grandmother raised my brother and I and never asked for a dime, well, not until it was time for me to go to college. She took my "dad" to court. Mind you, by this time he was remarried to a woman who had a mentally lacking daughter. He got on the stand and told the judge that I didn't have the mental capacity to further my education, you know, trying to make it sound like I was retarded. He also said he and his new family had too many bills etc. He was ordered to pay support. I went off to Notre Dame and did great. I DID get married my sophomore year and when he found out, he sued ME for the support my grandma was giving me, even though he had never paid a cent until I went to college!
2007-06-04 12:33:12 · answer #2 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why do fathers hate paying Child support?
They don't. Only men who are NOT fathers (in the real sense) and who only have a biological link to the child but are not real fathers do.
A father cares for and supports his child. Teaches them and provides for them a future in which to become what they were meant to be.
A man who is only a biological link to the child is a child himself and has not put away childish things.
Why are the fathers free not to pay when the child turns 18, when the mother is still supporting the kids?
Not true. In a few states, the support continues to age 21. regardless, at 18 the child is an adult. If the mother does not allow or require the child to be self-supporting by that age, it is a choice.
A mother may not make a unilateral decision to keep the adult a child for the purposes of indebting another party. That's why, when the child reaches adulthood, it is considered under law to be self-sufficient.
While there are provisions in all 50 states for continued support (on differing levels such as college expenses) because the child is an adult, they are responsible for themselves at this point.
2007-06-04 12:31:42 · answer #3 · answered by hexeliebe 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i am a divorced mom with children. i get the honor of raising my children, seeing them daily, caring for them when they are sick, seeing their homework everyday, their friends, their triumphs, their trials ect. i do not have to go 2 weeks without seeing them, i do not have to wake up and wonder how they are. i walk down the hall and see for myself. how lucky i am, really i am lucky. their dad.... not so lucky. he has to trust that they are ok. i would not want to be him. it is too hard. i do not ask for child support. if the kids need something then i tell dad so dad enjoys the experience of buying for his children. dad is not a money machine, an atm, a college tuition. he is the guy that cannot walk down the hall to check on his children because mom and dad couldn't get along. the kids sufffer yes, but so does dad, and so does mom. each in their own way. no parent has a great life when their kids are not a part of it.
i am a remarried stay at home mom, i budget, buy second hand clothes for myself, have inexpensive cars, my second husband is a blue collar worker in the lower average income bracket. we make the best of what we have and we have 4 children at home.we feel well off because we have our children close to us. i think getting child support is fine but blaming the fathers without thinking of how they may feel and what they have had to give up is wrong.
2007-06-04 13:06:54 · answer #4 · answered by adelaide 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I know some fathers hate paying child support because the mother don't spend the money on the kids. They spend on themselves. But then you do have your loser fathers that don't take responsibility for there actions. But a true father will take care of his children no matter what. Even if he dont see his kids cuz he wants the best for his kids.
2007-06-04 12:51:24 · answer #5 · answered by Djinn 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
1) Not all fathers/non-custodial parents hate to pay child support. Some do so willingly and with a complete understanding of their responsibility towards their children. Perhaps a better question would be, "Why do some women choose to have children with men who they know will not be willing to support them?"
2) The mother/custodial parent is free to not pay for her child when s/he turns 18, too. It is her choice to continue.
2007-06-04 12:32:14 · answer #6 · answered by Maureen 7 · 5⤊ 1⤋
Some are stupid and don't understand the concept of being a man a nd a father to his children. It's really sad how women get screwed in the process of life. It's also unfair that the kids are the ones who suffer. My only suggestion would be to know the man I mean really know what kinda man he is before deciding to have children with him.
2007-06-04 12:31:02 · answer #7 · answered by mrsknowitall 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is like paying to have your children taken away from you, that's why. Completely agree with Katherine.
If things don't work out, try to make them work out. If they really don't work out, and there is not enough money to go around, then there are real problems, such as this.
Government and the courts should stay clear and not get involved in relationships.
2014-02-15 07:43:09 · answer #8 · answered by Graham 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they may deserve the same life but they wont get it.. their parents dont even love eachother..
and they hate paying for something that they are really not helping or watching grow.. they are just losing money and not seeing what is coming of it..
think from that point of view..
2007-06-04 12:29:57 · answer #9 · answered by I ♥ Brennen 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋