My son is 16 almost 17 and my hubby had a total FIT because I bought him condoms. He has been dating the same girl for over a year and he said they were close to actually doing the deed and he asked me if I would get them for him. I did let him know how serious it is so have sex with all the pluses and minuses but if he is going to have sex- hey - he is gonna have sex. I saw it as my duty as his mother who loves him to get him the protection he asked me for. Was I wrong? I dont think I was! Im just glad he and I are close enough that he felt he could come to me and ask me!
2007-06-04 05:20:34 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Apparently, the people on this board criticizing you think it would be better if your son came home and either a) told you his girlfriend was pregnant; or b) had a life-threatening STD. Apparently, they would rather risk their children's lives to HIV or Hep-C rather than face reality that their almost-adult children are going to have sex. They need to get their heads out of the sand. Schools are not educating kids about responsible sex nowadays (a quick read of some of the appallingly ignorant questions teenagers pose on these boards proves this). It's the parents' job to do so. I commend you for being realistic and level-headed.
2007-06-04 06:01:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
The reason why your husband is so upset is because he may think by you buying the condoms, you condone your son to have sex. However... as a mom, you should be proud that your son asked you to buy the condoms instead of having unprotected sex. Be proud mom and stick to your guns for... if more kids were open and honest with their parents as your son is with you, we wouldn't have the problems in this world with teenage pregnancy like we do now. However... I wouldn't buy condoms for your son everytime he asks you to. For... each time that he asks, he is leaving you with the task of getting HIM protection. If he wants to be doing such a grown-up deed, HE needs to be responsible enough to go to the drugstore and get the condoms himself. If he's "embarrased" then... he's too young AND immature to be having sex in the first place. Sex was made for marriage only.
2007-06-04 05:35:50 · answer #2 · answered by Operator 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it is smart that you talked with him and explained to him the importance of safe sex and you know he will probably do it but that is all we can do now a days make sure our children are educated on sex, pros, cons and safe sex before they make that choice if your son was way younger like 12 or 13 I would of told you that was not cool and that you needed to discourage them from having sex at that age and tell her parents. But he is almost 17 what are you going to do NOT A THING he is close to being an adult and if he feels comfortable with you that is even better, but at that age if they want to have sex they will have sex and they will find a way to get away with it......I would rather know flat out and know that they are being smart about it then have my child running around behind my back and not even knowing if it is safe or not.
2007-06-04 05:28:05 · answer #3 · answered by nurserenae 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If my son asked me to buy condoms for him and he was 16-17 I would do it in a heart beat. I would feel proud that he wanted to be safe! Look at it like this. You can be frowned upon because you bought them but know that your son will not get this girl pregnant, get STD's or AIDS or you could have told him no and he might have had unprotected sex and put him and his girlfriend at risk. Better safe than sorry, he would have done it anyways. More parents should look at it like this. i think there would be less teen pregnancies. Good for you!
2007-06-04 05:26:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Some people say thats just encouraging kids to have sex but actually I think its way better to be safe than sorry. Theyre going to have sex with or without condoms if they want to and its obviously better to do it with condoms. I think you did the right thing and its nice that you have a healthy enough relationship with your son that he can come to you about this.
2007-06-04 05:27:17 · answer #5 · answered by Amanda 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you were in the wrong at all! Hell I'm a girl, and when my mom thought I was being sexually active she bought condoms for me to carry around, she said you couldn't trust the guys now a days to be prepared so I should be just in case it occured.
I think you are a good mom! Any mom that does that is a good mom. You are not promoting him having sex, you are just telling him if your going to have sex at least do it safely.
You should feel good that your son is that close to you. Most guys are to embarrassed to go to their moms about anything because they think mom's are clueless. So I think you did good!
GOOD JOB MOM!
2007-06-04 06:42:16 · answer #6 · answered by Torey♥ 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think that you did the right thing. First of all, it is wonderful that he has a strong relationship with you and was willing to tell you what he was planning on doing. While you can always tell him to wait, the honest truth is that at his age, they won't... I think that you were right to want him to protect himself from an unwanted pregnancy and STD's. Your husband probably wouldn't want him to come home and say that the girlfriend is pregnant, so he needs to cool down a little and think about what if your son didn't use any protection. Like I said, at his age... they're going to do what they want to wether you approve or not.
2007-06-04 05:44:57 · answer #7 · answered by zeus112999 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
i have 2 sons. so this caught my eye.
Your son and yourself obviously have a great relationship and i commend you as a MOTHER for having such a great open relationship with your son who openly told you straight out that he was about to have sex.
AWESOME! becuase my son whos 12 has questions on puberty and some sex questions (nothing graphic yet thank goodness) but he comes to ME and I always thought coming from an all girl family that going to MOM for sex questions as a GIRL is OK but not a boy! they go to dad! but my son chooses me. I am the lucky one! HAHA
i don't htink you were wrong! :)
2007-06-04 05:27:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Too bad there aren't more parents out there like you who take the time to care this much about their kids. Kudos to you for talking to him about it and realizing there was no changing his mind and getting him what he asked for. The fact that he could come to you with this is a credit to your parenting skills. Sounds like you have a fine young man on your hands and remind your husband that it's either be there and support him with the condoms now or be there and support him and his child and girlfriend when she ends up pregnant! Good for you and I hope my kids can come to me when the time comes - I'll do the same for them (hubby and I discussed this a long time ago and our eldest is only 3.5!)!
2007-06-04 06:07:39 · answer #9 · answered by thejezowskis 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Thank your lucky stars you have such a good relationship with your child. Buying him condoms is way cheaper than paying for an abortion, or antibiotics. People think that by providing condoms it means that you are giving them permission. They are going to do what they want so at least help them protect themselves. That being said, if he is mature enough to have sex, he should be mature enough to buy his own condoms. If he's embarassed. then he's not ready...
2007-06-04 05:26:15 · answer #10 · answered by Jenn 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋