I am 6 weeks pregnant & I dont know what to do?

Question

I have already asked this qusetion but i still need help... Anyways i am 21 and i was with my boyfriend for 6 years, we broke up 2 weeks ago cuz he wants to experience different things in life and i kind of do to. I found out last week that i am 6 weeks pregnant. When i told my ex his 1st reaction was get an abortion, & he is also not ready in his life right now to have a baby. So i have been thinking about having the abortion but i dont know if i can do it. Its not the babys fault that this wasnt planned & the parents arent ready & the parents arent getting back together is it? But i also dont know if i can do this on my own. I just dont think i can live with myself knowing that i had an abortion or knowing that i put a huge hold on someones life that i care deelpy about (the ex). Any nice advice would be helpful... Thanks...

Answer 1

Honey, no one can make that decision except for you. I know it is a very tough situation to be in. I have been there myself, so I know what you are going through. I would be more than happy to talk to you if you would like. You can email me if you want. Good Luck.

Answer 2

Well, being a Christian, I am prolife. However, I also do not judge people for their decisions. This is a tough call... I would advise you to not have an abortion, because I know someone who did 20 years ago and that is still all she thinks about. As others have said, there is always adoption, and many people are willing to have open adoptions where the birth mother can still participate in the childs life and/or the child always knows who the birth mother is. I am not a single parents but I do know it would be hard, but it can be done. There is a reason for everything so sit back and take your time to decide what you think would be best for you and your child.
(Just as a side note, my sister-in-law got pregnant when she was 17 by a guy she hasnt talked to since... Her little girl is 3 years old now and the doctors tell her she will probably be her only child because she will probably never get pregnant agian. Im not in any way trying to scare you into keeping the child, just weigh all possibilities because you never know what will happen down the road!)
Good luck in making your desicion and I will keep you in my prayers!

Answer 3

No one can really tell you what decision to make in regards to what you should do. It is your life and your body. No matter what choice you do make it is not going to be an easy one. You have to look deep within side of your own self and ask whether you could or could not live with the choice of having an abortion or to give the baby up for adoption. If you do go ahead and keep the baby; right now is the time to start working on a budget, if you have not already done so. It will be long financial struggle if you are the only one paying for the expenses and whatever road you choose it will also be a long emotional struggle as well. Coming from experience I have travel down that road before as well. Twenty-seven years ago I had a family members who tried to tell me that I should go ahead and have an abortion; for they thought I would not be able to handle rising a kid financially. Yes it was rough for the first eight years of having to manage a budget on my own. I cannot say it will be the same for you or if you might meet someone else who would also help to care for you and your unborn child or not. The future is uncertain; your child may turn out to someone great or may turn out to be someone not so great. Email me if you want to have someone else to talk more about this.

Answer 4

If i were you i would at the very least go through with the pregnancy and give the baby up for adoption. there are so many women out there that can't have babies that would love yours.
I was 19 yrs old when i got pregnant with my son, i had him at 20. It's not easy, but as long as you have family and friends to help support you emotionally and maybe some financially i think you will be fine. As i said above though if you are truly not ready for a baby i would go through with the pregnancy and give it up for adoption. Maybe your parents would want to raise your baby for you. There are many options. Just don't have an abortion. As you said, it's the not the baby's fault. You will have to live with the guilt for the rest of your life, the fact that you killed your baby. It can cause depression and ruin your life.
Can you honestly say that you could not feel guilty knowing the process of an abortion? Killing your innocent baby? I pray that you make the right choice. If you need any suggestions, ideas or support feel free to write to me. [e-mail] use yahoo answers as the subject.

Answer 5

I have been in a similar situation and come out the other side. In my case, my boyfriend and I hadn't been together very long when I got pregnant. I ended up living in a hostel on my own, we were still together, but I found out he had another woman and when I confronted him, he told me he didn't want to be with me anymore. It was so difficult. I had a very lonely pregnancy...I now live alone with my daughter, who is 12 weeks old. I'm not going to lie and tell you it was easy. But if you decide to keep the baby....you will get through it....because you have to. There will be times when you feel you can't handle it and perhaps you made the wrong decision. But you will cope.

You need lots of support, ask for help from friends and family....and possibly his parents too, if they're willing....

I know exactly how you feel, and it will get worse before it gets better. Sometimes, when my daughter cries at 3am, I sit up crying with her because, it is so difficult on your own. I often wish I had a man around to help me. It's not always much fun raising a baby on your own, but if there's someone who can take the baby and give you a break now and then, that helps a lot....perhaps your mum. If you don't live close to relatives or friends, then I would advise you to seriously consider moving closer, even moving back home if you can....you are going to need all the help you can get.

Goodluck, think carefully and make the decision that is right for YOU, think long-term and know that you are not alone.....

Danielle (21) and Jaya (12 weeks) xx

Answer 6

Please consider all of your options. I was 21 when I got pregnant very unexpectedly and I considered abortion & adoption. If you have even the slightest doubts about having an abortion then I would not do it if I were you. There is always adoption. There are millions of people that are not able to have children that would make great parents. Please don't let anyone pressure you into making a decision that you are not comfortable with. This is your decision no one else's. I know for me personally, once I saw my son I knew everything woud be just fine. All the way up to his delivery I questioned if I had made the right decision. Now I have a 10 month old son whom is the love of my life....and yes I am a single mom @ 22..it can be done...GOOD LUCK.

Answer 7

Dont have an abortion, you will regret it for the rest of your life. If you think that you are not ready to have a baby you can always do open adoption. Their are soo many couples out there that would love to have a baby and cannot because of medical problems. With an open adoption you can pick the parents out for your child and all kinds of different things.. Also you can talk to your parents if you are close with them. And if you do decided to do this on your own i know you can. Yess it will be hard at times but you will find the strenght to get through this. Good Luck!

Answer 8

It will be hard but I would keep the baby.

I wouldn't be able to live knowing that I had an abortion and I would be able to deal with giving my baby up to someone else either. i would always be wondering what if?

If you have a good family around you they will help support you during this difficult time. But I think you would regret not keeping this baby.

Also, don't think of it as you putting someones life on hold. Although it wasn't planned and it was an accident, your ex is a part of this too. It is partly his responsibility.

Answer 9

I'd say that the your ex doesn't deserve the consideration you're giving him in this equation. It's early days yet, so don't do anything rash. Can you talk to your mum or friends? Whatever you decide will be right for YOU, not him, not the unborn baby, but YOU. It's not the end of the world if you have an abortion, and I wouldn't let comments like 'you'll regret it for the rest of your life' figure in your decision making. I expect though, deep down in your heart, you already know what you want to do, and whatever the decision is, it's the right one for YOU. Good luck.

Answer 10

Abortion is a major event...it is the loss of a child unnaturally....it would be a strain on you physicallly and mentally if you are not prepard for it....I would say dont do it...it sounds like you wouldnt be able to handle it ...I would instead look into adoption....this turns out good for all involved...you can hand your child over to parents that will love it and be able to support it physically, mentally, and financially....but has a young mom I will say this...an unplanned pregnancy is not the end of the world....You do find ways to make it work....Babies are a gift from God....I would not change my unplanned child for the world...he makes my day everyday....It is a wonderful feeling to know that you created this living breathing child....I would not worry about the ex...if he doesnt want it he can always sign his rights over...but you can also make him pay child support....he in no way can make you have an abortion...it is YOUR choice not his....Just think everything over very carefully!!!! Good LUCK

Answer 11

You are right... this isn't the baby's fault, but you could go ahead with the pregnancy and then give the baby up for adoption. There are plenty of people that are going to stay together and would love to have a baby, but can't. Don't get an abortion. You need to think of the baby and how much joy he could bring another family!! Good luck with everything!!