please help i just found out that my 13 year old is being bullied by some kids at her school which apparently started over she was supposed to have said something to a teacher about 1 of the girls, last week she has 20+ kids following her around would not leave her alone and she was very scared, i have told her that i am going o contact the school as this is not on, but she said i will make things worse, what should i do it hurts me to see her like this.
2007-06-03 20:21:07 · 10 answers · asked by mumstheword 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Deal with the biggest mouth and the rest will go away by themselves. Bullies are only bullies when they have backup, but if the mouth falls the others are lost for what to do. She may get into trouble for fighting but the threat dies very quickly and the punishment from the school is worth it. My son was bullied at 10 and with my permission (not the schools) he jumped up oneday as he was pushed, grabbed his attacker around the neck in a headlock and punched him hard in the face several times, small children do very little physical damage they dont have the strength for it. But the fear factor is enormous. He spent a week in detention with extra work for fighting and was almost suspended but he has never had trouble since. He is 20 now and is still respected by his equals. I am against violence and do not invoke it in any given instance. My fighting career is defensive and designed to create comfort and assertiveness in any individual. There comes a time when enough is enough, turning the other cheek only gets that one hurt as well . Cop the hard yards and end it immediately. Give her lots of cuddles and understanding when its over.
2007-06-04 01:25:13 · answer #1 · answered by flipknuckle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello, first of all I am so sorry for your situation. I can relate because I am a teacher and I have witnessed bullying and of course studied the effects of it. Don't let your daughter become the victim anymore. Give her the confidence and strength to overcome this by talking with her-one on one- about how she should approach it. She is only 13, so simply telling her to hold her head high, ignore it and to also have her look the bullies straight in the eye and tell them "Get a life" or "Stop thinking about me so much. " It is best when you give the child words that can make them feel empowered again. I have mixed feelings about the whole thing because as we all know bullying is something that runs deeps and it is hurtful for everyone involved. It may get slightly worse at first, but I would STRONGLY recommend communicating with the school. Your daughter is understandly afraid that things will get worse, however, if the school is doing their job, they will do everything they can to ensure that doesn't happen. Another option would be to contact the parents. Again, another touchy subject. However, sometimes the consequences at school may be mild compared to what they will experience at home. I would do my very best to empower your daughter and protect her from this hurtful and awkward time that all adolescents experience at one point or another. I would also use this time to point out to her what has been proven about bullies. They are the children with the lowest self esteem and I would use this also as an oppurtunity to point out the way teasing feels. Your daughter most likely will not be on the other side of this situation and that has to make you feel great as a mother! :) Good luck and I hope everything works out in yours and your daughter's favor.
2007-06-04 04:45:36 · answer #2 · answered by Deanna 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Get her some kind of self defence training. Any kind - even if it's just you and her in the back yard on a mat with some boxing gloves.
One thing that would send a message to all the kids involved would be for your daughter to make an example of one of them.
When the school or parents of the little ***** come complaining, don't feel bad. You did try other methods.
One thing thats best to teach your daughter is to stand up for herself. This lesson will do her some good in the future too.
2007-06-04 07:43:55 · answer #3 · answered by psycho_majic_666 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well now--given that this sounds more like terroristic threatenings, and not just bullying, the school, police, and even further up if needed, needs to get involved pronto. O/W, your 13-y/o could wind up more than just scarred--more like seriously hurt or even disabled, or killed ( sorry--but this is serious here). Get Help Immediately!
2007-06-04 04:44:38 · answer #4 · answered by Mudcat007 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
hmmm....this is tough to solve.why dnt u go nd speak to the principal of the school?dnt mind ur daughter askin u not to.u hav to.this really works but the problem is that the kids will still have hard feelings for her.try changing her school,which will be easier now,cause i am sure she doesnt lik the school anymore.
all the best.
2007-06-04 03:49:44 · answer #5 · answered by Love My Crazy Hair! ★☆★ 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Teach her some smart a** comments to shoot right back at the little jerks, and if they still bother her consider moving her to a different school or class.
2007-06-04 03:26:05 · answer #6 · answered by ~~*Paradise Dreams*~~ 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Teach her how to fight... in roll her in some martial arts class... there is no way she should be afraid of some little 13 year old punks...
I bet if she beat the crap out of one of them... that crowd would dissolve faster than you can blink.
2007-06-04 04:22:11 · answer #7 · answered by Infamous Twit 6 · 4⤊ 1⤋
i would go to the school and talk to the dean... theres a no bulling policy in school now. ur daughter shouldnt hate or fear school. its there for her to feel safe and learn...
2007-06-04 08:44:05 · answer #8 · answered by kitttkat2001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Another School. MOVE HER!
2007-06-04 09:33:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Contact the police. Tell them thatt your daughter is fearing for her safety. They will contact the children's parents. Also, get a restraining order against them.
2007-06-04 03:26:59 · answer #10 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 2⤊ 3⤋