child abuse?

Question

Hi.

Is it normal or should i say usual for young children who have been sexually abused to start touching themselves at an early age? Obviously children do not masturbate as they are too young to understand the sexual part of it all most often?

Please do not give any insensitive answers as this is a very serious question and topic and can hurt many people.

thank you to anyone who answers kindly.
x

Answer 1

I was sexually abused when I was eight, and after that I was obsessive about sex and touching myself. But as I got older, I grew almost of afraid of it... Now I think I've found a healthy middle ground.

Answer 2

Very young children can experience 'nice' feelings from touching themselves whether abused or not. Children who have been abused may not begin exhibiting behaviour until they actually reach some understanding of what has happened to them and then it may take many forms. Some become wary of any sexual contact with anyone and some may present as quite normal. Some however go on to be abusers themselves for whatever reason.
Because a child touches him/her self it is not a cause for concern but abnormal sexual behaviour towards others has to be checked.
Best wishes, Mike.

Answer 3

I was abused, and although 'curious' from the age of about 8-9 as to what everything was for, I never attempted to explore the pleasurable side of things ... I didnt know there was a pleasurable aspect.
Basically, all kids are curious. They explore. If you directly say, or give indication that something is out of bounds, they get curious. Often, without so much as a word, just by body language and what is NOT said, adults give a message to children that their private parts are taboo. So kids will prod and poke and explore. They may or may not find it pleasureable, and if they do so, they will continue to touch themselve untill it bores them or they are told to stop and have it explained to them why it is inappropriate. They dont do it to be sexual, its just a new sensation that feels good.
I have seen it documented in medical encyclopedias that even babies maturbate, although in the majority of cases, this is seen only in male children as 'access' is easier. A baby does not know what sex is. This activity is just pleasurable to them, but usually stops if they are provided with toys and activities of interest.
Some children will display sexual behaviour publicly when they know that their parent will react strongly to this. This is a form of attention seeking and needs delicate handling.
Its easy enough to sit quitely with a child and ask A.) why they feel that they want to touch themselves and B.) has any other child or adult touched them in this way.
The best method of getting children of a young age to not masturbate is to simply explain that these parts of their bodies will be something they will use when they grow older and the this is an activity for adults only. Do not get angry or aggressive or the child may come to associate their genitals, and later on in life - sex, with a deep seated feeling of shame.
I doubt being abused will make a child masturbate. Abuse is painful, not pleasure and it is terrifying. It will cause a child to associate their private parts will pain, fear and shame. This means they would tend to avoid touching these areas rather than exploring them.
I hope this helped. This is a very touchy subject and if you feel you are unable to handle it alone, I reccommend talking to your family GP, as they can be very helpful in advising you in this area.
Best of luck

Answer 4

I'm so sorry to hear about this little child, whoever he/she is. No child should have to go through that kind of thing. No HUMAN BEING should ever have to go through it.

It's entirely normal for little children (of both sexes) to touch themselves. It does not mean that the child has been abused; it's just a part of growing up. You're right that they don't usually understand the sexual part, so no, they aren't masturbating. But they ARE very curious to know what they have down there and to understand how it all works. And so they explore. It's rather like a little baby holding his feet up in the air and looking at them intently. He's just fascinated by what he has attached to his body.

I'm not sure about one thing. Do you know for sure that this child has been abused, or are you afraid that he/she may have been abused because he/she is touching himself? If it's the latter, then you have nothing to worry about unless you've seen some other things that are clear indicators of abuse. If you know for sure that there's been abuse, please help this little child find help. The touching itself is not a sign of maladjustment, but a child who's been abused can and will have other difficulties if the abuse is not addressed in therapy.

I truly hope that this answer helps and that nothing serious has happened to this little child. Thank you for being a caring person. :-)

Answer 5

It is natural for any child to explore their own body's, not just sexually abused children, a baby boy can seem to get excited and it is not because he has been abused, it is a normal function in all children.
You may find children who have been abused will be more advanced for their age with word usage and the way they go about things such as touching others and so on.
Even though children do not have the adult words to express themselves they still have the feelings and it grows stronger as they grow into adolescents.
it not just because a child had been abused that they express their sexual feelings, but looked at closely and listened to you can soon pick up the differences between a child who is just exploring their bodies and a child who has been abused as children find it harder to keep adult words out of their language and adult ways are different to a child's way of exploring sex and sexual ways of expression.

Answer 6

Children who have been abused can display behaviour that doesn't fit in with their age group such as apparently inappropriate touching and other language and behaviours.

I am not a 'professional', but i do know several people whose lives have been disastrously affected by childhood sexual abuse.

The most common consequence I have found is that the victims can go through the whole of their lives never knowing what a normal relationship is...and at the same time taking out their anger on the partners they meet and destroying every relationship around them rather than deal with the abuse and the abuser.

The first criminal is the abuser...the second is the family that deny what has happened.

ADDED:

Beware of the deniers like pick me...If you suspect this has happened, find out!

Answer 7

Actually, it is quite common for small children to masturbate---even if they haven't had anyone teach them, they do learn on their own pretty quickly that it feels good to be touched 'down there'. I mean, if they do it excessively, then it does become a problem. Just because a child masturbates does not mean they've been sexually abused.

It is, however, much more common for chilldren to masturbate if they HAVE been sexually abused.

Answer 8

It's not uncommon for children to touch themselves;however, if a child touches him/herself in a sexual way to the point of masturbating this is not common at all. The child should be taken to a professional for help in dealing with any issues that he/she may be experiencing. Most importantly though, the child needs to know that his/her family and friends are supportive through this trying time. Hope this helps.

Answer 9

It would make sense as a lot of pornstars and strippers always talk about how they were exposed to that stuff by abuse at a young age, possibly making them extremely sexual at a young age causing them to choose that career path.

However, I believe it can also go the other way, many times when children are abused they become very aloof and don't like to be touched even when older and have psychological issues regading those things.

Answer 10

It's neither normal nor usual but can happen. Children who have been abused are more sexually aware than others their age through no fault of their own. That said, some kids do masturbate cos they enjoy it and it feels nice.
Get some advice, maybe from healh visitor or psychologist.
Hope that helps x