Hidden phone calls, hidden and late night computer times, better dressing, less affection, short phone calls w/out I love u often, not home often, lashes out often, lies when confronted about computer time, does not like me near him for phone calls. We relocated across the country and my depression/solitude has taken a toll on the marriage, I feel guilty about that. I also had suspicions that he would want someone else that I expressed it, so perhaps I made this a self-fulfilled prophecy. But after he abandoned me on a long weekend for "business" and just gave me obligatory calls and I found missing condoms - I really think it isn't my imagination. How do I get him to tell the truth? If this is true after he has been so difficult and hurtful on top of it, I want to leave, but I don't want to hurt him, just leave amicably. How do I do that?
2007-06-02 22:12:22 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
1- get work if you dont have one
2- be sure you r financially secure
3- look to the mirror and see how beautiful and worthy you are and you DONT need a man to live
4- face him of what you think
5- if he is cheating leave him and let him work hard to get you back
6-if he doesnt work for you dont worry it is better like this because there are a lot of men who wants you but you have to build your self esteem
2007-06-02 23:17:02 · answer #1 · answered by Silent tear 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My gut feeling is that he is cheating on you. Don't feel guilty as you do not make someone cheat on you. He is an adult and knows what he is doing. We all have our choices and it is up to each individual to make the right choice.
You can't make him tell the truth. He may just deny it or he may give in and tell you the truth.
Don't over think and try to convince yourself that maybe he isn't. He wants you to be confused.
I am so sorry he did this to you. Hugs to you. You will be fine.
2007-06-03 08:25:23 · answer #2 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi, I'm quoting this answer directly from http://www.cheatinghusbandsforum.com
Seems to really apply to your question. Hope it helps!
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Well in my opinion, it is either 1 of 2 things:
1. He is falling out of love with you.
2. He is cheating on you.
Start collecting evidence quietly without him knowing. If it is happening, you will one day confront him. There is nothing worse than those stupid lies, one after another!
This is where the evidence will come in. You will nip the denial right in the bud. There will be no room for lies.
Good Luck
P.S. If he has fallen out of love with you and NOT cheating. You have hope of reviving your relationship if that is what you want. But, you need to check all the evidence out first.
2007-06-04 13:26:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, its very obvious he is cheating...I was skeptical until I read the missing condoms part, that prtty much would have told me all I need to know. Why worry about hurting him? You need to worry about your self because cheating men don't seem to worry about hurting anyone else of bringing home a STD. Just leave.
2007-06-03 06:31:55 · answer #4 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweety i m afraid he is cheating on you....well y do u even care about this person??if he is cheating on you do u think that he deserves any concern of you?he didnt not think that he would hurt in the worst way..anws go up to him and pretend that you know for sure,and ask him like for eg: So what is her name?Is she better than me?Does she make you happier?if thats the case just tell me so you can and this ridiculous thing that i used to call a marriage,and just walk away without saying something more...u ll understand for his look and his behavior what the truth is if for eg, doesnt come after you when u ll turn around to leave tat means that yes...he is cheating on you...
Hope i m wrong but if i m not,just have in mind that for him to do that to you mean he didnt love you enough so just move on and never look back.an never think that this is your fault because yes **** happens in marriage but that doesnt mean u should go and sleep around,thats just dishonest!
2007-06-03 06:58:27 · answer #5 · answered by nch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl ...Leave him now.
You cannot "make " someone quit lying to you,but you CAN leave them.
Make it short,swift and without warning..Otherwise it'll backfire.
Maybe after you're gone for awile he'll leave the other person for you.
Do not beat around the bush.
Split...scram...go..and don't look back until he begs you.
You deserve better and that s the onlt way you'll get it.
Good luck.
2007-06-03 05:31:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The signs are all there and at this point its time to confront and there is no nice way to do that, and just remember it holds true once a cheat always cheat, you deserve to be happy and shouldnt have to deal with that.... good luck
2007-06-03 06:16:43 · answer #7 · answered by Renee 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't need all those signs to know the truth, you think hes cheating? that's how you know. U don't wanna leave him??????? you might hurt little fellas feelings??? HA! honey life's to short to care for someone who seems 2 not give a **** about you. i know you hurd it before, to the left to the left..... i dont think there is anything any of us could say to you 2 get u to grow those balls to leave. good luck
2007-06-03 05:24:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
there is no way to do that amicalbly. i say just leave. if u really want to know whats going on then leave for a few days for him to realize whats going on and then ask. there really is no other way to find out whats going on unless u call cheaters and have them tail him. but to me it sounds like u'd be much better off leaving and finding somewhere u actually feel safe and wanted. good luck!
2007-06-03 05:18:38 · answer #9 · answered by shutupndrive 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry but you are living in denial. You sound much too nice for him. I sure hope you don't have children 'cause I hate to see kids hurt, but you deserve so much better.
2007-06-03 06:17:38 · answer #10 · answered by QuantumB 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋