I've been paying to put her through school on and off for the past six years. I know she has a lot to do (we have two kids together) but I'm getting soooo frustrated with her taking so long with school, and I really don't feel like she appreciates the sacrifices I make to make it possible. I've been entertaining the notion of divorce for almost a year now, but I don't want to do that to the kids. I think about cheating all the time. I know this isn't healthy, but when I talk to her about it, she says she's doing everything she can. She has about four years left of school, which could easily take her ten, lol. If anyone has any recommendations, please let me know. Thanks.
2007-06-02 11:58:34 · 11 answers · asked by utahbizboy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
College. Bachelors in Nursing.
2007-06-02 12:07:46 · update #1
Since we've been married I've also put myself through school, built a beautiful home myself, and started a successful company....
2007-06-02 12:14:42 · update #2
Sounds like you guys got together young. I'm sure she appreciates you, what is going on? Maybe you two need to get away, even if just for a weekend at a local spot. You need to remember why you guys chose to be together, and rekindle that. If there isn't anything "there" anymore then you need to tell her that is how you feel. Keeping secrets like that is unfair to both of you. Hope that helped you, good luck.
2007-06-02 12:07:32 · answer #1 · answered by cajuncalli 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No answers for you, Buddy, but definitely some empathy. My wife has essentially been dead weight through 18 years of marriage. She has let her looks go down the toilet, easily piled on 100 lbs over her ideal weight, refuses to get any kind of job that pays anything close to decent money, let the kids get away with murder while I was always forced to be the 'bad guy', is slovenly and is a slob, is wildly emotional, can't be trusted with money or credit cards, yet spends my money like a drunk sailor. And she wonders why I've lost interest in her. Help me God!!!!! Situations like this is what affairs are borne of. My putting her through school (nursing school, also) is my 'alimony in advance', which I'd get stuck paying one way another. Once mine finishes school I am sooooooooooooo gone.
2007-06-02 12:55:34 · answer #2 · answered by Charlie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are picking a small "annoyance" and using it as an excuse to get divorced. Do you love your wife? You want a divorce because you have accomplished more than she has? You have two children. Who takes care your your children everyday? This is a sore spot for me because my ex husband wanted someone who was more ambitious. Well, you try raising 3 kids and tell me how much time and energy you have left at the end of the day!
2007-06-02 12:25:50 · answer #3 · answered by Tonya D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are not happy at all and I don't think this is healthy for the kids either. You should do somethings. Does she really study hard? Is this what she really want to do? You have to ask yourself if you really want to keep your relationship or move on with your life
Why most of the ladies don't appreciate the good guys?
2007-06-02 12:18:23 · answer #4 · answered by Natalie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am afraid that if you choose to cheat, you will bring disrespect upon yourself as well as upon her. Honesty is best in this situation. You have a responsibility to yourself to be truthful with you, first of all. Ask yourself about what it is that makes you stay in this relationship. Is it healthy for you or her if you continue on, especially if it leaves you feeling negative. It doesn't mean anything bad about you or her if you find that it just cannot go on. Maybe it is time for you to say, flat out, that you will separate to determine what is best, and do it. Don't allow her to say that she is doing the best she can. Fighting to stay above water is not good for you or her. I had the experience of a spouse choosing to cheat rather than being honest. It will only bring more harm to yourself and to her if you continue without dealing with these issues and in fact stepping away before other problems filter in. She may not be happy, but it is best to be honest. Respect yourself and her, love her enough to walk away if that is what you feel is best at this moment.
2007-06-02 15:20:17 · answer #5 · answered by dancing_in_sunlight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She does understand that you support her and pay her schooling fees but at the same time she's got study, kids, homework and chores '(I'm not saying that you sit around on your **** I'm just trying to get you to understand what she does). Dump the kids at the relatives/friends for a weekend and have a heart to heart talk with her.
2007-06-02 12:18:05 · answer #6 · answered by Acyla 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its sorta a stupid reson to divorce someone. Everyone moves at there own pace, some are just faster than others. And being a mom and going to school is not as easy as you think..
2007-06-02 12:08:20 · answer #7 · answered by Angel V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love her stay if not then you should go. But think long and hard about it. Your kids will be the ones to pay the price. Mine did. He recovered pretty well but it was really tough at first. Good luck with whichever you decide to do.
2007-06-02 12:05:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see where u are coming from. That is a long time to go to school! I hope it's for her doctorate! If not head for divorce court!
2007-06-02 12:05:38 · answer #9 · answered by Tanya W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you mean "school"? Because at first I thought you meant college but then it became apparent that you don't, how old is your wife?!
2007-06-02 12:02:18 · answer #10 · answered by Spazzcat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋