I have been married for 3 months, but I admit that I love and miss my ex-boyfriend TOO MUCH. We were together for 4 years, but my ex stalled so much and always changed his mind to get married, that it was hard to assume we would ever get married. He hurt me alot when he always changed his mind.
I moved back to my country because of Visa issues, and starting hanging out with an old boyfriend. After 5 months of dating, he asked me to marry him, i wasnt sure but said yes. I didnt want to waste anymore of my life being single and "waiting" for my boyfriend to marry me.
I know my ex is devastated (we never officially brokeup, and I feel guilty) and loves me so much. He tried to stop the wedding and came to my country but I was too confused to change my mind. I love him too and miss him. I am SOOO confused. I THINK I am happy, but deep down I know I should have waited for my ex, but the reality is that I am married.
What should I do? Will my feelings change?This is terrible.
2007-06-02 07:07:44 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Forget your ex and do all you can to work things out with your husband. You're suffering from "Buyer's Remorse" -- did I make the right decision, did I do it too fast, etc.
Be happy -- make your husband happy.
2007-06-02 07:11:59 · answer #1 · answered by merrybodner 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you need some time and space to think, by yourself - which, let's face it, you should have been doing before. It really isn't a good idea to do something as important as marrying, when you feel that confused and haven't really broken up with your ex. But I guess you know this now. Well - could you take a couple of days to go somewhere quiet and think things over? Is there anyone you can talk to who could give you some help based on knowing you, as we of course do not? I am sorry you are going through this - it sounds awful. But I would not doing anything else in confused rush - take your time, and list your options and the consequences of those options - maybe in a journal.
2007-06-02 14:13:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is so terrible. I feel awful for your husband mostly. You too.
You know what the right thing to do is. You have to do it, no matter how hard it is. Passion/feelings fade and change. They aren't stable. But your integrity, trustworthiness, and choosing to love your husband is. You need to get your ex out of your life so he doesn't ruin your marriage. You married this guy, you can't leave him and hurt him like that. You need to try to put your energy into your marriage and your feelings for your husband will grow. Love is a verb, a choice, not a fleeting emotion. Hopefully your ex learned a lesson so that when he does meet the girl for him, he won't take it for granted and wait too long.
2007-06-02 14:14:47 · answer #3 · answered by Mrs. Eric Cartman 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you where on the rebound when you met and married. This is something only you can decide, where does your heart lye? Take some time alone and try to figure that out. I guess we never know what we have, until we lose it. Good luck to you whatever your decision is, I know you will make the right one.
2007-06-02 14:23:49 · answer #4 · answered by Pengy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop all contact with the ex. If he was the one for you he would have married you when he had the chance. Your husband loves you and deserves your full attention. If you focus on your husband's good points and remember that he really loves you, you should stop feeling so confused.
2007-06-02 14:13:03 · answer #5 · answered by Aloe-ish-us 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Frankly dont u think u r cheating ur husband? I mean what is his fault besides marrying u? How would u feel if u were in his place?There r certain decisions in life that one has to take whether one likes it or not.As for ur ex.........all i can say is that he missed the bus.An honest suggestion.............let the past be just that,the past dont mess up ur & ur husbands' present & future for that.Get along with life,fate never intended u to be with ur ex. anyway.
2007-06-02 14:20:00 · answer #6 · answered by surendra s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a tough situation. I think it would be best if you put thoughts of your ex out of your mind and tried to focus your feelings and atttentions on your husband. I believe the feelings for your ex will fade in time.
2007-06-02 14:13:38 · answer #7 · answered by Melanie J 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only you can answer that question; you need to start by being completely honest with yourself, and with your husband. Without total honesty, you have nothing. Best of luck to you and your decision about your future!
2007-06-02 14:12:35 · answer #8 · answered by grandm 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ah man that is a tough one 4 now u have to live on Ur decision and hope that ur ex will ever 4give u
2007-06-02 14:13:26 · answer #9 · answered by vernon b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You got to get over your ex. You are married make it last.
2007-06-02 14:12:40 · answer #10 · answered by greentea 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋