2007-06-02 00:44:28 · 7 answers · asked by magpiesmn 6 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Well persons arnt per say getting annoyed by my talking or anything like that. Its more I feel like im just giving more information then I maybe should and instead let the other person figure out what exactly I mean themselfs instead of trying to spell it out word for word. I guess im perceiving myself to be possibly sounding like im trying to talk to the person im talking to like they are below me or something by saying to much. But its hard to tell if my perception is accurate or flawed.
2007-06-02 00:53:27 · update #1
listen to others speak...also, try to notice if the person you are talking to is getting a bit annoyed. then remind yourself to give other people a turn to speak!!
well, try to give the info short and simple. you don't want to insult the person's intelligence. i'm sure the person you are talking to may give some indication as to whether they follow what you are saying or not! if they don't follow, then you can talk a little more!:)
2007-06-02 00:48:08 · answer #1 · answered by becki 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First let me say that I too am a "detail "talker. Over the years I have been critisized for what some may consider a charecter flaw, as a result, I have been forced to give this a considerable amount of thought. I came the the conclusion that I am actually a great story teller. I know that for me personally, when I ask someone a question, I am truely interested in what they have to say. It bores me to hear "one word" answers. I like to be entertained. So I tend to give wayyyyy too much information when asked a simple question. It took me realizing that in my "using up" all of the "air space"(in other words, not giving others a chance to elaborate) I was in a sense being rude. That was one of the reasons I had to cut back on my lengthy stories. Another way was to look at the face of the person, or persons that you are talking to. You will(with practice)see if there is a genuine interest in what it is you have to say. And finally, it took me hearing the phrase "they don't care" one too many times to finally curb my desire to go on and on and on. Don't get me wrong, there are those out there who do love to hear the details in your answer or story, but save that for the truely interested. As far as sharing too many details about the personal stuff, you are probably an open book, and very trusting. I have found that people who don't share in this way tend to feel less important, thus the one word answers, as if I wouldn't be interested....The funny thing is, I AM! Thats why I'm listening. I would never want to make anyone feel as though what I have to say is more important, or that my story is better(ever hear the "top this" expression?)
Now to the basic step by step process of breaking the habit . When you wake in the morning, be with your own thoughts, and then tell yourself that today is going to be a "listening "day, that you will keep your answers short and to the point using few words. And then really really listen to what is going on around you...Others talking as well as the sounds in your environment. You might be very surprised to find that the more you practice this, the more others will ask you if every thing is ok, it will be hard NOT to go into great detail on how you are practicing the art of listening, STOP yourself from doing that as it defeats this whole process. I now love to listen, as much as I love to talk. I now chose my word wisely, and actually have those who are truely interested ask me to go on.
Good luck with this and please feel free to share the details with me of how it all works out for you.
A fellow talker
2007-06-02 01:53:25 · answer #2 · answered by blugrl_on_rckgrv 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop and think before you open your mouth to speak. There's nothing wrong with being talkative as long as you are thoughtful of the others you are with. Give everyone a chance to speak and say whats on their minds and give an opinion on whatever the conversation is about. If you find yourself being the only one saying anything, it may be time to be quiet for a few minutes. There's nothing interesting about a person who talks and talks and talks but never listens to anyone elses problems, feelings and opinions. Just be aware of yourself and others and show interest in other people by asking them questions and giving them a chance to answer. Balance is key. I think as long as you pay attention to what's going on around you and the people you are with, you are fine.
2007-06-02 02:13:53 · answer #3 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I find that I have the same problem. I LOVE to talk. Something I try to do when I think i'm talking too much is ask the person I am talking with a question. Nothing like, "You know?" but something that will get the other person to share a similar story.
Sometimes though, you just gotta bite your tounge. lol
2007-06-02 00:54:14 · answer #4 · answered by chichiwvu 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Start listening
2007-06-02 00:47:39 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
COMMNICATION is important
but LISTENING is greater.
instead of openning the mouth.
open the ears.
best
2007-06-02 00:50:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just to think about ur self.......deeply. u will get what u want....
2007-06-02 00:58:41 · answer #7 · answered by Naeeem A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋