???????rite now i am a little down what should i do ??

Question

ANY JOKES
OR WHAT EVER IT TAKES TO MAKE ME SMILE
PLEASE

THANKS TO EVERYONE
YOU ARE ALL REALLY HELPING :-)
=-=-=- I FEEL BETTER ALREADY :-)

Answer 1

I'm sorry to hear that. I had a great day because someone complimented me on my parking. After returning to my car at the mall, I saw a tag under my windshield that said "PARKING FINE". I'm so glad they give feedback these days.

Answer 2

"Hello?", "Hi honey. This is Daddy. Is Mommy near the phone?"

"No Daddy. She's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul."

After a brief pause, Daddy says, "But honey, you haven't got an Uncle Paul."

"Oh yes I do, and he's upstairs in the room with Mommy, right now."

Brief Pause. "Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do. Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy that Daddy's car just pulled into the driveway."

"Okay Daddy, just a minute."

A few minutes later the little girl comes back to the phone.

"I did it Daddy."

"And what happened honey?" he asked.

Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser and now she isn't moving at all!"

"Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Paul?"

"He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too. He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window and into the swimming pool. But I guess he didn't know that you took out the water last week to clean it. He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he's dead."

***Long Pause***

***Longer Pause***

***Even Longer Pause***

Then Daddy says,

"Swimming pool? .... Is this 486-5731?"





Young man asked an old rich man how he made his money.

The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel."

"I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents."

"The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37."

"Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars."

Answer 3

I love you....Please smile for me.

Also, when I am sad, I smile, and im surprised in the change of feeling.

Answer 4

a vampire goes into a bar and ask for a cup of hot water. the guy hands him a cup of water and looks at him strange. the vampire take a pad out of his pocket and says am making tea................

the pad is already used.............. with blood from a girl's period

Answer 5

a million jumping jacks.

Answer 6

Talk to Buk, he's weird, but funny.