i have been married 5 years have to young children with my husband we have been seperated before for 2 years off and on when he left me for a stripper! (ok yes and i went back to him like an idiot) anyhow we just got back together 8 months ago and nothing has changed he comes home everynight at 7am-9am and i am so tired of all of this when i tell him i dont like it he tells me i am not his mother that i am just a nobody. when i call him he tells me not to cause he doesent bother me by calling me he calls me a Bit$$ all the time and has been abusive in the past he says that if i dont leave him alone he will hit me again..we never go anywhere together the last time we went anywhere was out to eat 3 years ago he tells me everything would be fine in this marriage if i would just get over it and understand that he is going to do whatever he wants to do (not to mention he belives a woman should pay all the bills and take care of him)
2007-06-01 09:08:31 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Install a pole in the bedroom, a strobe light, surround sound, and tell him you don't take less than $10 in your garter.
2007-06-01 09:11:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 5⤋
Wow... it sounds like you already know what you need to do. Nobody deserves to be treated like that, and the only reason you're probably sticking around is because he makes you feel like you can't do any better. Well, YOU CAN. So pack up the kids, get your stuff, leave him, and don't look back. It's going to be the hardest thing you have ever had to do, but it will be worth it in the long run. Do you really want this guy to be an influence on your children's lives? Break free from whatever hold he has on you and give yourself the chance to be happy.
2007-06-01 09:16:31 · answer #2 · answered by violetmal 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I bet he laughs at you with his buds. I don't understand the question. The real question is, "Why would you live like that?" There is a lot of great guys out there that will take care of YOU and cherish YOU. Don't settle for less than happiness. This guy is every woman's nightmare. Run, don't walk. When he comes home (when he wants to), let him be what he wants to be. . . Single, with a cook, a maid, and a laundry lady that pays his bills. Sweetie wake up!
2007-06-01 09:22:01 · answer #3 · answered by Cookie Lady 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave. This isn't love, it's abuse. Do not go back.
There's an old saying: "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." Why would you tolerate all this horrible abuse? Do you do this so you don't have to get a job and go to work?
Call an attorney and find out your rights. Most initial consultations are free. Call the 1-800 abuse hotline (you can find it on the internet). Or contact one of the many women's crisis centers. If he is hitting you, call the police and FOLLOW THROUGH by pressing charges. Do NOT buy into his 'act' that he will go into such as crying, pleading, and promising to reform as well as "I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I really love you! I love you and the kids!" (sob, sob) That is done simply to placate you for a short time; then he will go right back to what he was doing before (as you have already seen). He thinks that you are a foolish woman, a sucker and naive, and will not follow through. Show him you are empowered and ready to do what is necessary so you and the children do not have to take any more of his unnecessary garbage. Stand firm.
And remember: As the other adult in this relationship, YOU are legally and morally liable for the health and safety of your children as much as he is. For you to continue putting them in harm's way makes you culpable.
2007-06-01 09:20:55 · answer #4 · answered by D 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
How much longer are you going to allow him to disrespect you? seriously.....you should have left him a long time ago. So much for 2nd chances & changes between the both of you. No husband in his right mind will be going out all night, calling you a b i t c h, saying he will hit you "again" then go & believe a woman should pay all the bills & take care of him?! NO WAY. Yup! your marriage is worse than horrible & what are you still doing in it?
take it from me.....HUSBAND OR NOT, this man does NOT love you, he does not care for you or respect you. MOVE ON!
2007-06-01 09:15:24 · answer #5 · answered by sugarBear 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like you are trying to save something that is not there to begin with. You have two children. If he hit you once, he'll do it again. In this case, your kids come first. Bail on the jerk and do not look back.
Until you learn how to take care of yourself, you can't do a good job at taking care of anyone else. My mom taught me that after my father treated her the same way.
Hit the road, your future is waiting.
2007-06-01 09:37:18 · answer #6 · answered by flopsy mopsy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
and this is a question... I think you already have an answer. Ask yourself why you stay with him what keeps you in this relationship these are your (barriers). Once you recognize them it will be easier to address them. Are you afraid of him? Will he hurt you if you leave? If so contact your local battered womens shelter so they can help you with a safety plan. If its your kids know that children learn from what they see not how you treat them so you can give them all the love in the world but when they see you being called names and feeling depressed,scared, etc thats who they will become. Good luck .
2007-06-01 09:19:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh my God woman, so what are u still waiting for? the time he kills u? or the time he gives u two black eyes?. U better start making arrangements to go somewhere with you wonderful kids and start life all over or else state making contribution towards ur coffen because men like that never change, get that!!.
i believe there is someone out there who is willing to treat u with respect and dignity than that idiot
2007-06-01 09:37:07 · answer #8 · answered by asuoonline 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know your "marriage" is horrible and now we know too.... but the ones who matter are those two children.
Your' husband is NOT a man. He's a moocher and a disrespectful boy.
You need to leave or it is a guarantee that you'll raise two children who will end up just like him.
Oh.... and learn from your mistake. Don't leave him and jump into a relationship with another one Just Like Him.
Your children deserve better from you.
2007-06-01 12:42:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh HA HA, bout the part of women taking care of the bills, he's crazy. sweet heart, plz leave him. he is not worth it. i know its extremely difficult bein that u have 2 children with him, but you have to respect urself and protect ur children, cuz lord forbid if he strikes at you, he might hit ur kids too. you have to love urself more girl, this is the rest of ur life we're talkin bout, dont ever let a man do u like that, he's a loser he's the nobody. get out of that. and quickly. u dont need that bull crap. so good luck.
2007-06-01 09:15:46 · answer #10 · answered by Kr@zie♥Be@utiful 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This guy sounds like a real piece of garbage...don't you want someone who will actually love you. The way he treats you, he does not love you. even if he says it - it is not true. You don't hurt someone you love, physically or mentally.
And if my boyfriend ever put his hands on me he'd be in jail. Things will get worse if you take no action. Leave him and call the cops when he gets abusive. If not that night, then the next day.
2007-06-01 09:15:17 · answer #11 · answered by Angel Eyes 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋