is my husband cheating?

Question

he went drinking at lunch with some people from work. he came home drunk and i went shopping and took his phone with me. i got a text from a girl he works with i pretended to be him and texted back a few times to see what she would say she didnt text anything incriminating so i called her and asked her why she was texting my husband[after i told her i would kick her ***] she said that he told her that he was divorced and that he tried to kiss her. she said nothing happened that she has a boyfriend.when i asked him about it he said he doesnt know why she was texting him and that he didnt tell her he was divorced or try to kiss her he said she was a temp worker and she has only been there for a week and he doesnt even know her that well the reason she has his number is explainable im really hurt over all this but want to trust my husband he is not really the cheating type but i have trust issues my ex cheated not sure what to believe please help

Answer 1

The girl is probably just trying to cause trouble for your hubby.

Answer 2

SOMETHING happened but to what extent and why it didn't go further is anyone's guess. If the girl was just trying to get him in trouble she wouldn't have done it the way she did. After all, she didn't know you had your husband's phone. I think you should have a LONG talk with your husband about his behavior. Whether he actually cheated or not, his actions were inappropriate. Perhaps you should look at this girl's texting as a wake up call. Your husband may not have cheated yet, but he is clearly considering it. Understand that there is no such thing as "the cheating kind". If you continue to deny what you know is the truth just because it is heartbreaking to deal with then matters will probably escalate. Find out what you and your husband need to do to get closer. I recommend marriage counseling. Cheating is a symptom of problems in a marriage, not necessarily the cause.

Answer 3

Well she must have got the number from him. Maybe your husband didn't give it to her intentionally- he might've given it to her while he's drunk. You know people do stupid things when they're drunk- even if your husband isn't the cheating type, God knows they could be the type once they have alcohol in their blood.

If this is the only time he's done it you should just try and believe him & put this aside. But beware if it ever happens again. You also have the right to ask him to easy with the drinking, especially during lunch... it just sounds very inappropriate & unprofessional if one must go back to work after lunch. He wouldn't want to get in trouble with his boss would he?

Answer 4

He was just up to no good sweetie and I think the girl was really being honest. She didn't have to say anything about the kiss .....and if she was someone out to distroy him she would have said they did more than that! Go out and have lunch with her and I bet she will be honest about everything. Put a small tape recorder in your purse and record the the conversation for your husband if you need it . It does prove one thing he has it in him to cheat on you. Women like to believe that their men are not the cheating type ....and usually these are the ones that can fool you! I would investigate every detail of it from the girl further untill I was comfortable with all that I found out sweetie.

Answer 5

My wife's 1st husband cheated also and it took her a LONG time to trust me even though we had known each other for 14 years b4 we got married. I think occasionally she still gets these feelings even though I have not and will not cheat on her. She said it was like getting hit in the stomach w/ a baseball bat - being cheated on i mean.
You should prob. give your husband the benefit of the doubt. If he's generally trustworthy, you shouldn't expect him to start lying suddenly.

Answer 6

The fact that you have trust issues isn't his fault or problem. He isn't cheating and you can't trust a word she says. She could easily be hitting on him and since she works at his office can get his phone number without a problem. You have issues to deal with and if you don't you could drive him to cheat.

Answer 7

You got issues! You not only pretended to be him to get her to say something incriminating, but then when she didn't and proved your husband's innocence, you called her and threatened her?? Holy geez!

Do you see how your suspicious nature made you act this way? Get yourself some professional counseling to deal with your trust issues.

Answer 8

While everyone wants to believe their husband. Who has more reason to lie? He does. he was confronted about possibly cheatin. Why would she be lying to you? It IS possible that shes just wanting to cause trouble but does she have a reason to do that?

This is a tough situation. She should NOT be texting him. If its not something he would do in front of you, he shouldnt be doing it. Either way, he shouldnt have a girl sending him text messages.

Answer 9

Someone is lying. It may be the girl. Give him a chance since he is not the cheating type, but watch for other signs. You know him better than anyone on this forum.

Answer 10

The problem here is alcohol. He probably doesn't remember what he said or did. Ask him to quit drinking when he's out with other people. Try to forgive him this once.

Answer 11

Well, a man who is cheating or planning on it will say anything to get his wife off of his back. My ex explained a pair of panties that I found under the seat of his car as he found them in the apartment laundry. Be on your guard!