Why do men become unstable when it is time to make a commitment?
2007-06-01 03:42:46 · 25 answers · asked by Donna S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Precisely because it is a committment. Look at all that is on the line--the guy must take on a real job, put on a tie and uncomfortable shoes for 8 hours a day for the rest of his life, his days of fun free living are gone forever, if he happens to settle with a bad woman his life is immensely screwed--half of everything he ever earns is hers, and even if things work out beautifully he is on the hook for the wife's expenses, the cost of a house, cars, and like $200,000 per child. It IS a committment and not flying into it is the only sensible course of action. How could anybody possibly look at all of that financial responsibility, plus committing the whole rest of his life to a job he might happen to hate, plus giving up all his fun and independence, and not get scared?
2007-06-01 03:50:05 · answer #1 · answered by jxt299 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Humm great Question!
I would say That I may be among the few and proud who like commitment and stability,
My self esteem and confidence have always been very high
I am very bold and will say anything have quick wits.
been married 26 years, married at 17.5 years old
so commitment is not an issue for me!
most men put on a big show but when the game begins they can't play a lick. to me commitment makes men unstable due to the fact that they are now no longer in full control but are in many ways responsible for the happiness and care of another soul. I think it kinda freaks them out!
I believe they don't fear the commitment but they fear failure in a relationship. men are taught from a very early age not to cry and be strong.
well a woman is the very thing that will knock that right out of you, women are like a flower your scared to touch it because it may hurt it.
Lord fore-bid a woman to cry in front of a man, Guys can't handle it. unstable is an understatement. men don't have a clue at this point- why because we were not suppose to cry but girls can!!!!!
2007-06-01 04:15:52 · answer #2 · answered by kiphyn b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a co-worker who freaks out once he gets past 2 months of dating, but he's been in his job for about 5 years. It's an interesting thing to observe. I think that societally marriage has become seen as the end of a man's time to have any fun in his life, and that would freak anyone out. Also, there is that innate fear that a woman will change into a fire-breathing harpy from hell the second the couple is back from the honeymoon, it's a stigma that has become so wide-spread that it is just "one of those thing" that is seen as the way society works. If you thought you were losing all your freedom, fun, and that the person you love is going to turn into a monster...wouldn't you be afraid to commit too?
2007-06-01 03:48:17 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not always about getting the milk free so why buy a cow. But because they are not ready to settle down, that is get married, have kids, support a family. It is a big commitment and they don't feel in that point in their life they are ready to make such a commitment. Would your rather he make false commitments or be honest? Many women freak out also when a guy proposes them because they are not ready to honestly make that commitment in life.
2007-06-01 03:55:26 · answer #4 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
They are afraid they might be passing up the chance to be with someone better or someone different. They don't want the same thing or person for the rest of their lives. Most of all, they fear being trapped and obligated. It feels like a prison sentence to them.
Some men are capable of making that committment and joyfully sharing their lives. Other men will always fear that loss of freedom and be looking for an escape. Those men should admit it to themselves and anyone they are in a relationship with and they should never marry.
2007-06-01 04:09:24 · answer #5 · answered by friendlyadvice 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are forcing them into an un-natural situation. For several million years men were polygamous. A thousand years ago an upstart religion made mongamy a standard through the possibility of pain and dismemberment. Now you are forcing hin into a situation that goes against the total of his biology. It freaks men out.
2007-06-01 05:47:51 · answer #6 · answered by bocasbeachbum 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For the same reason women become frigid as soon as they make a commitment - the eternal boredom of sameness.
It's not all men, or all women, by the way.
Just most.
2007-06-01 05:14:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nooo! Commitment!? *shudders* burrr I suddenly feel a chill. LOL I guess there is just such a permancy to it...and the whole idea of being with one person for the rest of your life can sometimes be a little frightening. Well the idea is nice but the reality can be scarey. You know its one thing to think it but another to do it, just the fear of the unknown.
2007-06-01 03:49:14 · answer #8 · answered by Joseph 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why are men so unstable when faced with a committment? it goes both ways. i don't think it is fair to sterotype women on this issue. maybe you are picking the wrong women to date or be serious with. i would try to date women that are more stable and sure of themselves, ones that have high self-esteem and secure with themself and know what they want. good luck!
2007-06-01 04:12:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Woman chose when we have sex- Men choose the the commitment.
2007-06-01 04:21:29 · answer #10 · answered by jay 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋